Aware & Aggravated - 23. Realities People Like To Hide

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Hi friends, I don’t know where this episode is gonna go, but I’m gonna just stand here

and run my mouth and see what happens.

So the thing I want to talk about is people being a lot more intentional about what they’re

doing than you think.

I’ve kind of touched on this in other episodes, but I’ve never like really went into it.

I’ve said people are trying more than you think, putting more effort into things, but

people are a lot more intentional behind the shit that they’re doing.

And the reason I want to make a whole episode about it is because everyone makes it seem

like shit happens to them by accident.

So success, if someone’s very successful, if someone’s famous, if someone has a lot

of money, if someone has a really cool outfit, if someone has a really good body, they act

like it’s all just a fucking accident and like it just happened.

And they oh my god, they’re like a deer in headlights, like just a ditz.

Oh my god, how did this happen?

I don’t know why that’s so common and why that’s like the trend is to act like you fucking

have no clue how you got where you are and how you have what you have.

But people behaving like this and people hiding their true intentions behind what they’re

doing fucks a lot of people up in the head.

So like everybody pretends like they’re not actually trying and they’re not actually intentional

behind their actions like, oh, I just don’t know how it happened.

And that sends the narrative that shit happens by accident.

Success does not happen by accident.

Making money does not happen by accident.

Having a really good body does not happen by fucking accident.

So I want to go into a lot of these things and kind of deconstruct some shit.

And I’m going to hit like every area I can think of, really, like, no, there’s not that


There’s like six or seven.

So there’s seven areas I want to like deconstruct and shed some light on because I know what

it’s like to be working towards shit.

And okay, this is something that I’ve noticed there’s a void of in like social media spaces.

So it seems like there are people that are wanting to start working toward their goals

and like they have their little routine and they’re like doing their shit.

And then you have people who are already successful.

So you have the people that are starting on their success journey or you have people

that are already fucking successful telling you how to get there.

But you don’t see anyone in the middle struggling and failing and busting their fucking ass

and keeps getting shit thrown in their face.

So I’ve noticed there’s a void in the market basically for someone that’s climbing the

ladder but is also sharing all the trials and tribulations and all the hard shit that

comes with it.

That’s why I’ve opened up so much about some of the things that I’m facing and I’m dealing

with on my road to trying to fucking make some goddamn money.

Like honestly, it’s so frustrating and I feel so isolated and alone with it because I only

see people who are already successful.

That’s not where I’m at.

They’re ahead of me.

And then I see people who are doing their basic little fucking daily routines with their

lemon water and making their bed thinking that’s going to fucking do something.

I’m going to do a whole video about morning routines and having a routine in your day

and how it’s actually fucking you and holding you back.

But that’s a separate episode.

But my point is there’s people that are ahead of me or people that I feel are behind me.

I have no one to relate to right now.

Like where’s the people struggling their fucking ass off?

Where’s the people that are like failing?

Where the fuck are y’all?

You’re sitting there fucking being quiet and not posting shit and that’s making other people

like you and me feel alone because nobody wants to post that.

Nobody wants to fucking post how they’re so goddamn frustrated or how they just lost a

certain amount of money or how shit’s just not working out for them.

No one wants to post that.

But it’s important that we start posting it because I really need to relate to someone

right now.

I need to feel like someone fucking gets it.

Like I feel like I’m struggling and like as Gary Vee said, eating shit.

I feel like I’m…

I hate that motherfucker, okay?

He pisses me off.

But I feel like I’m like sucking fucking wind and I’m struggling and the only people I have

to turn to are people that are ahead of me that are already at the other end of success

or people that are just having the idea and starting and doing their little routine.

Like, you know, I have no one that’s actually like made shit, started shit, done shit and

like it’s failing.

Like honestly, where the fuck are y’all at?

Like connect with me, be friends with me, be friends with me so we can be there for

each other and fucking help each other through this shit because it’s hard.

I need someone to lean on, but not just someone that is there.

Like I want someone that I can relate to.

I want someone that’s like going through it with me.

Human beings suffer less when we suffer together.

So it’s not going to seem so fucking bad if we fail together.

So let’s do that.

But I’m also not the type that gets like jealous.

So like if we’re both working on something and your shit takes off and mine doesn’t,

I don’t give a fuck.

I’m going to be just as excited for you.

I’m not going to be intimidated.

I’m not going to be mad.

You’re going to like push me to work harder.

Like I’m going to be like, okay, it can happen.

Look, it just happened.

It worked.

Like I can do it too.

I’m going to feel encouraged, not intimidated.

So if somebody goddamn come be friends with me that’s on their little entrepreneur journey

and is struggling because I feel very alone and I’m upset.

But anyway, let’s get into my fucking seven topics of where I’m about to expose these


All right.

So success.

That’s my first one.

People that are successful, it doesn’t happen by accident.

I wish it goddamn fucking did.

I wish it just happened by chance and I wish it was just fucking easy.

Like success does not just happen to people.

Even if they’re not busting their ass, they’re doing a lot more than you think.

So an example is Kylie Jenner.

Like, yeah, she was born into it.


But so much more went into her being famous than people even fucking realize.

Like, yeah, you have the fame of the name, but that bitch became one of the most famous

people in the world because she was marketed.

She put what she needed to put out on social media and yeah, all these big managers and

shit are telling her what to post, telling her what to do, but she’s still having to

do the work and post the shit so that she can become famous.

She’s still having to do a lot of things.

And there’s so much more calculated action than everyone fucking realizes behind that.

Because if you look at her Instagram, she’s just a pretty bitch that does nothing.

She has some skincare, she has some makeup, but like, she’s just a pretty fucking girl.

That’s it.

Like that’s all she contributes through her fucking Instagram is some cool pictures to

look at.

That’s why I’m saying everything is so much more calculated than you realize.

Literally every fucking thing about people’s social media is calculated and thought through

and take so much more effort than you think.

I guarantee you there’s 10 fucking people that run Kylie’s Instagram and she’s just

the one that takes the fucking pictures or has the pictures taken of her.

But there’s 10 different fucking people analyzing shit, thinking of shit, scheduling shit, telling

her when, where, what, how, and all that.

It’s not just her running the fucking Instagram, I promise, but we don’t see any of that.

We don’t see any of the planning and the preparation that goes into any famous person’s Instagram

or anyone that has an Instagram with like a decent amount of followers.

Because as much as like my Instagram is a shit show and I just throw random shit up,

sometimes I think it through and I calculate it a little bit.

Like I had to take into consideration the way that my grid looks because I have brands

that are like looking at my shit and I have to make it like look pretty, you know?

But you don’t get to know that.

You don’t get to know that these people are planning all this shit and putting all this

effort into it.

All you see is that they post a little story or they post a little Instagram picture.

They just make it look so effortless.

It’s like, oh, I just took this and threw it up.

Look at me.

Look how cute I am.


Like that’s all it seems like it is.

But there’s 20 times more the fucking intention, effort, and strategy behind it.

Look at fucking Rob Kardashian.

He ain’t shit.

He has basically the same opportunity being related to the family and he’s a fucking flop.

He didn’t do shit with it.

Like Kylie tried and like has done a lot more to have the fame that she has and the success

that she has.

Like I get it.

A lot of people want to say it was fucking handed to her.

Kris Jenner is a goddamn genius.

I’ve said this before and I will give credit where credit is due.

I fucking love her.

They both have the same opportunity.

And why did Kylie skyrocket?

Because she fucking did more.

I can guarantee it to you.

But she was a lot more intentional with trying to gain an audience than Rob is.

Rob is like, okay, whatever.

I’m a little famous.



Like he’s his intention is probably to make money.

He did that.

And Kylie’s intention is to be famous.

So she’s gone after that and done that.

But the success of that is like, there’s so much more that went into it.

Even with like goals and shit to meet a goal, people are doing so much more than you realize.

I’m overlapping because I’m about to get to that shit because like all these things are

goals really.

I have gotten so off track with this shit and I’m frustrated with myself, but I’m talking

about success.


I keep overlapping points, but success, it is not fucking easy.

It’s not, I shouldn’t say it’s not easy.

It’s not simple.

It’s not simple by any fucking means.

It takes a lot more action than you think.

It takes a lot more intention than you think.

And I say then you think, because everybody’s posting that it’s easy fucking peasy.

Like, Oh my God, you just drink your lemon water in the morning and you make your bed

and you meditate and your journal is successful.

No bitch, that’s not fucking success at all.

None of those things lead to success.

None of those actions directly lead you to success or having a business or owning shit

or making money.

Sorry, none of those actions that everybody keeps posting about are going to make you

a fuck thing.

This is just my reassurance to you.

If you’re trying to start something or you’re trying to be successful and you’re like running

into a lot of shit, nothing’s gone wrong, babe.

Nothing’s gone wrong.

I swear the more you become aware, Oh my God, look at me rhyming.

I swear the more you become aware you’re going to see that all the things that you’re facing

other people have faced too.

You’re not like the odd one out.

Like everybody has to go through a lot of shit and like put a lot of intentional effort

behind things and like this whole manifestation shit bro with the whole like you just think

a thought and it’s going to create your reality.

No bitch, intentional action is going to create your reality.

So if you want success, you got to work for it.

You got to do things.

You got to take action.

So just think anyone that you know that has a business has had to go through the process

of doing the paperwork for a sole proprietorship or LLC or whatever paperwork they did to establish

the business.


People have done so much more than you realize for their fucking business and you’re never

going to realize that until you try and start one.

You’re going to be like, God damn, all these people were doing all this or like they hired

an attorney to do their paperwork, but like, damn, like I, they had to do all this.

You’re going to realize as you start to create something, fuck like a lot more went into




So my next point is going to be about fame.

That one was about success, but I got some shit to say about fame.

People that are posting on Tik TOK myself included, we’re a lot more intentional about

what we’re posting than we lead on.

Like I schedule, not schedule because you can’t schedule tech talks, but I plan out

when I’m going to post certain things, what I’m going to do certain things.

I record videos and I never post them.

Like I have over 400 drafts because I’m so calculated about what I want out there and

how I want to represent myself on my Tik TOK accounts, both of them.

So I record a lot of fucking videos.

I do a lot of shit, but I’m very picky with what I post.

Like I’m a lot more intentional behind blowing up on Tik TOK than it might seem like.


There are videos where I am just effortless and I’m like, whatever, I don’t give a fuck

if this one blows up.

But some of them I’m like, God damn, I hope that one does good, you know?

But it’s always the ones that you don’t expect to blow up that blow up.

Because my Cabo video of me taking shots in my hotel room, that was just a for fuck video.

That’s like a for fun video.

And it got like 10 million views.

And I was like, huh?

Like that’s my most popular video.

And it still shocks the shit out of me.

But my point is, I’m a lot more intentional behind my Tik TOKs and everyone is so much

more intentional behind what they’re posting than you fucking realize.

Everyone is worried about what time they’re posting.

They’re worried about their fucking caption.

They’re worried about the way their pictures look on Instagram, whatever it is.

People are so much more intentional behind it.

It’s not a fucking accident.

It’s not an accident that people look the way that they do and post what they post.

It is all very much intentional.

People say the shit that they do and behave the way that they do online for a reason.

There’s a reason that everybody behaves a certain way.

Now my shit is my personality.

Like that’s just how I fucking am.

Like you know, like the people that know me know me because my podcast reflects exactly

the same as my Tik TOKs and shit.

Like I’m the same fucking person, but a lot of people construct like who they are and

how they behave.

But they do that for a reason.

Like that fucking dumb bitch that is like a Trump, like she’s the Trump bitch that goes

to the college campuses and her name is Caitlin or whatever the fuck.

And she’ll go to like campuses and like harass people and just like fuck with them and try

and start controversy.

Like she goes around with her little microphone, you know, I carry, right?

Like shut the fuck up.

You dumb cunt.

You dumb fucking cunt.

You Oh my God.

I just wish I could run across the bitch like that so I could put her in her fucking place.

Oh my God.

I would eat her the fuck alive with my words because she’s a girl so I wouldn’t hit her.

But when she said, I can’t, you know, I carry, right?

Yeah, I do too bitch.

I want about it.

Oh my God.

But you don’t need to run around and fucking say that.

You don’t need to run around and be like, I have a gun.

Shut up.

Shut the fuck up.

I’m not even talking about that.

Leo, get onto something else.

Get onto your point.

But my point behind that bitch is like, she knows what the fuck she’s doing.

She knows she’s starting controversy.

She knows what she’s saying is causing people to want to watch her videos.

They like to watch the conflict.

It’s so fucking funny.

But she behaves that way on purpose.

It’s very much calculated.

Like that’s just, that’s not just the dumb bitch.

Like she knows what she’s doing.

But like with videos, if you just would take a second and ask yourself what went into this,

you’re going to fucking get disgusted.

Like if you look at someone like Vinnie Hacker for the people that know Vinnie Hacker, I’m

about to eat this little boy alive.


So like any thirst trapper.

So like Vinnie Hacker is just a man who comes to mind.

But if you look at all of these people that make like thirst trap videos, if you just

imagine, okay, what went into this video, you’re going to get the ick.

Because if you imagine these people like setting up their ring light, putting their fucking

phone on it, setting their phone up, making sure that they’re in frame and then like making

sure that their abs look good and like moving their pants around.

Like when they, when you like imagine them trying to perfect their self for the fucking

camera or like the ones where they stick their arm out and record their self.

Like imagine Vinnie Hacker laying in his bed with his arms stuck out trying to be like

sexy to his phone.

Like bitch, as soon as you imagine it from the other end of the phone and you’re like

observing them making the video, you’re going to get the fucking ick and you’re going to

be like, ew, like that’s embarrassing.

Like even with my shit, sometimes I’m like, you literally like can imagine me like walking

up, setting my phone down, making sure I look okay.

And then running my mouth about some stupid ass shit or like making a fucking cooking


Like if you just picture what went into this becoming a thing, that’s when you’re going

to start realizing like, oh my God, there’s like 45 fucking things I didn’t even think

about that like made this video a thing.

And the whole thing I want to like bring to light in this and my whole intention behind

making this podcast episode is for people that want these things.

Like when these people are posting and making it seem like it’s so easy to achieve these

things and it just happens by accident.

When you go out and try to do it too, you think it’s going to be easy or you think that

you’re going to get really good results because you’re doing what everybody else is doing.

They’re doing 12 times more than what they’re fucking showing you that they’re doing.

So when you try to do it and it’s really hard for you, you’re going to think something has

gone wrong.

You’re going to be like, what the fuck?

Or you’re going to get really discouraged.

And I’m here to make this episode to reassure you nothing’s gone wrong.

It’s hard for fucking everyone.

Like they’re just making it seem like it’s no big deal.

But all the effort that you’re having to put in, yeah, bitch, they all are.

I promise.

Like don’t get discouraged, please just keep going.

Keep working towards what you want to work on and just realize that everyone is more

intentional with a lot of fucking things than you even would consider.

And I’m going to get into more like personal things in a second.

But next thing is money.

People are a lot more intentional about making money than you think.

Everyone has a bill of some sort or rent or whatever they have to do.

And even the people that don’t, like I live at home with my dad right now and I’m living

for free because I don’t have to pay rent.

So I’m staying here to bank up some fucking money while I decide where I want to move


I’m moving out in the next couple of months.

And the whole rationale behind that is like, I’m not going to pay to live in Pensacola.

If I’m going to pay to live somewhere, I’m leaving.

So like I’m when I move out, it’s I’m moving away.

I’m not just moving out.

So I’m trying to like, figure my shit out with that.

But yeah, people are a lot more intentional about making money and having an income than

they let on.

Like money is such a like a taboo fucking topic.

And nobody talks about it.

And nobody like tells the truth about their intentions with it.

Like everybody wants to make fucking money.

Everybody’s goal is to make money.

We need it to fucking survive.

Like, at the end of the day, I know I have the whole episode about money where I said

you did it.

Like we all want it because it makes things very, very easy as a tool.

So who doesn’t want more tools in their fucking toolbox, everybody.

So I just want to like make that clear.

People are a lot more intentional about fucking money than we think.

And one thing I kind of want to bring up about that is like, when you see influencers online

with their fucking paid posts and shit, you do not realize how much work goes into that.

So you don’t see the hours of communication back and forth between the influencer and

the brand.

And then you don’t see the contract they send over.

And then you don’t see how long it took for them to create the content, whether it’s take

a picture or make a video for the brand, then they have to send it to the brand for approval.

And if the brand says no, we want something different, you have to redo it.

And then you post it.

But all the viewer sees is you just took an effortless looking picture and threw it up

and made $20,000.

That’s not the fucking case, okay?

It’s so much more complex and so much more difficult than you think.

And the intentional behind money thing, the reason I’m bringing that up is because there’s

nothing wrong with wanting to go for more money.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to make more money.

Everybody fucking does.

So there’s just a narrative that’s pushed where it’s like, no, you’re not supposed to

want more money.

You’re not supposed to nothing.

And if you do want more money, you’re not allowed to talk about it.

You’re only allowed to suffer and struggle in silence.

Like you have to fucking just deal with it and then you can make the money, but don’t

brag about it.

Like there’s such a weird fucking like connotation around money and like the whole thing.

But everybody’s more intentional with it than you think.

And I’ve said that like 25 fucking times now, Leo, shut up.

You see all these people spending all this fucking money online.

It’s like they have to be intentional about making it.

And even people that are like born into really rich families and they have the money there,

they’re fucking stressed about it.

They’re not just like, ooh, carefree, like it seems like everybody has a concern around

money and stresses about money.

The people that fucking go and are spending all this shit.

It’s like they’re stressed too.

All you see is them being happy.

Oh my God, just being carefree and spending all this money.

It’s like, no bitch, they’re stressed the fuck out too.

And even if they’re not like stressed like we get because we’re normal people, um, they’re

at least like taking it into consideration and being like, Oh fuck for a second.

You know, like everybody has that kind of worry.

It doesn’t matter what fucking tax bracket you’re in.

Everybody has money stress and everybody deals with that shit and people are more geared

toward making more money than you’d think.

So like even these little trust fundy people, like they know they’re okay right now, but

I guarantee you they’re fucking stressed about their future.

They’re like, okay, I’m going to enjoy myself.

I’m just going to ignore it.

I’m going to go party and have fun, but I’m just going to ignore this feeling that’s coming

up of like, Oh my God, what am I going to do?

What if my money runs out?

What did I piss my parent off and they cut me off like that’s all going through their

fucking head.


Next one is a little bit more personal.

So what people prioritize, they are a lot more intentional about, I swear to God.

So when people prioritize relationships or trying to talk to certain people, they’re

a lot more intentional than you think.

If someone likes you, they will prioritize talking to you.

And I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but if someone makes an excuse for why they

can’t be with you, understand that it’s an excuse.

I don’t care if they’re like, I need to go work on my mental health.

I’m not in the place right now for a relationship.

I’m worried.

I’m really stressed.

I’m yada yada.

Everything that they say is a fucking excuse because I’m more busy than I’ve ever been

in my entire fucking life right now.

And my mind is pulled in like 45 different fucking directions.

But if Mr. Right came and plopped down in my lap, you best believe him and make it fucking

work because I’d want him.

Like if I found Mr. Right, I would do what it took to keep him and have him in my life.

So if someone truly likes you and truly cares about you, they will be intentional about

prioritizing you.

Don’t let no one give you no fucking excuse on why they can’t be with you, but they still

want to be friends or like, Oh, I can’t date you, but I still want to be friends with benefits.

Fuck that.

They’re telling you they don’t care about you enough to date you.

But yes, this is reassurance that people know what the fuck they’re doing and there are

a lot more intentional about what they choose to prioritize than you’d think.

But like friendships too.

If your friend is going to hang out with other people, they’re prioritizing that.

They’re choosing that.

Like people choose who they want to hang out with.

People choose who they want to be close to.

People put the effort, the intentional effort into who they want to put it into based off

who they like and who they care about.

People are not as oblivious as you’d think.

I swear.

I really promise they’re not.

Like if you voice something to someone and they just act oblivious to how they just don’t

know how you feel so neglected and they just don’t understand how you feel like unwanted

as a friend and not prioritized, no, they fucking know.

They know exactly what they’re doing.

They’re prioritizing other shit.

They just don’t want to say it to you.

Like just if when someone does that, just let them do that and go fucking do something


Like don’t let someone just like play around with you like that.

They’re clearly not okay with communicating their true feelings and intentions.

Uh, well one, you got to ask, but two, if you ask and then they give you some bullshit

excuse, they don’t want to fucking hang out with you.

And that’s that.

And the same goes for dating someone.

Like if they give you a bullshit fucking excuse or any excuse, like I said, it’s an excuse,


And I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but people are intentional about spending

their energy and time on things they want.

If they don’t do that, it’s because they don’t want it.

Oh my God.

The next thing on my list, like I’m annoyed just fucking looking at it.

People’s appearance.


And I’m about to like unravel some thoughts on this shit cause we’re going to get to tattoos

in a minute.

Oh my God.

It fucking makes my ass itch.

People and their fucking tattoos nowadays.

But we’re talking about looks and appearance first.

So people are a lot more intentional behind the way that they fucking look.

People are a lot more intentional about the vibe that they put on and the clothes that

they wear and the certain like style they have.

People are a lot more fucking intentional behind it.

Then you realize they’re fucking outfits, their style.

Like everybody’s going for a certain look.

All these boys on fucking Instagram and tick tock that are trying to look like they’re

being effortless.

Like they’re putting, they’re laying that shit out the day before.

Like they’re spending an hour every night thinking of what they’re going to wear the

next day.

Like they’re laying their outfit out to go to the fucking coffee shop in the morning.

Like they’re fucking going to school.

They’re picking their outfits.

They’re laying their little fit out like their first day of school outfit.

They be putting that level of energy into every day’s outfit to look effortless, air

quote effortless bitch and ain’t fucking effortless.

They’re trying so much harder than you realize.

And they’re not just going to thrift stores and finding all this great shit.

I promise you, I fucking promise you these little thrifters online.

They’re not fucking finding all this cool ass shit at thrift shops.

There’s a lot of places that make vintage looking things and they just sell them at

on on online shops.

Like they’re very much mass produced.

They’re very much not vintage.

There might be a couple of things people find that are ventures that are cool, like from

thrift shops or wherever, but not as much like no one is wearing a full fucking thrifted

outfit and look in the way that these people look.

You’d look raggedy as fuck or shit just ain’t going to fit you right.

So like a lot of people get their shit tailored and that’s something that people need to take

into consideration.

These people are not going to these thrift stores and just finding things that fit their

body perfectly.

They’re fucking getting shit altered so that it does fit them perfectly, but they don’t

show you that.

They just show, Oh my God, I went to Goodwill and I found 500 fucking things and they all

fit me perfect.

Look, I have a whole outfit look for $12 but you’re not going to say you spent 150 on getting

it tailored.


Oh, that’s the shit that irks me.

People just are so fake about what they’re fucking doing and they hide so many details

and it’s like, yo, so like when I go to the thrift store and I don’t find a fuck thing

that fits me.

So I go to 12 more stores and I don’t find a single fucking thing that fits me good or

looks cute.

Like where are y’all finding y’all shit, you know?

That makes me think something’s wrong with me.

Ain’t shit wrong with me.

There’s something wrong with y’all lying about what the fuck you’re really doing.

I also am six foot seven, so I will take that into consideration.

So I’m not going to find much that fits me very Alfie, so I will throw, I’ll put that

one to, I’ll put that one to rest.

Okay, let’s get into tattoos.

So when people get tattoos, they know what they’re getting.

They’re choosing what they’re getting.

They know how it’s about to fucking look.

They know the vibe they’re about to have.


And that’s something that irks the living shit out of me about tattoos nowadays is every

fucking little Joe Schmo fruit loop has them and they try to get them to look all tough

stuff like there’s these little 18 year old boys on tick tock, be bopping around doing

their little dances with dope ass tattoos on like some tough stuff as shit.

And like, you can’t tell who’s with it anymore.

Like you can’t tell who actually will fuck your shit up or won’t anymore.

Like every normal ass person has tattoos now.

It’s like the people that used to have tattoos and used to fit a certain image.

We’re like, okay, we need to watch out for them or like, Oh, let’s be friends with them.

They’re with the shit, you know?

That’s how like you could like tell.

But nowadays everybody has tattoos.

These fucking no good, can’t even fight soft as a marshmallow motherfuckers are covered

in tattoos.

Vinny Hacker, what are you fucking doing kid?

Like he has some cool ass tattoos, but like girl, you trying to look all grunge and tough

stuff and you over here living in a goddamn fucking mansion and you over here making thirst

shots for a living.

It’s very contradictory.

Like people want to look a vibe, but they don’t want to be the vibe.

Oh my God.

I just fucking figured it out.

That’s it.

There’s so many losers with these goddamn tattoos trying to look a certain vibe, but

they are not that vibe.

Like these are the type of people to like try to look tough stuff and then get their

fucking shit smashed in because they’re a fucking pussy y’all.

You could tell I’m aggravated by this because there’s so many people that have like a false

sense of confidence and a false sense of superiority because they have some fucking tattoos.

If you’re a fucking loser and you have tattoos, all you are now is a loser with tattoos.

You’re still a fucking bozo.

Your skin might look a little cooler, but you’re still a fucking pussy at heart.

I think that’s another really big contributor to everybody being so fucking confused is

because nobody is what they portray.

Like everybody’s intentionally getting these tattoos to look a certain vibe, but they know

that ain’t them.

They know that their personality does not match that shit.

Like I saw this one boy on Tik Tok, I think he was like 17 and he had like knuckle tattoos

like how biker gangs get them and he had hand tattoos like skulls and shit with flames.

Like he had some really, really well done tattoos and I fucking loved them.

But he’s this little fucking teeny bopper that like you ain’t been through a fuck thing.

Why are you dressed like that?

Like why are you dressing your skin like that to put on this image that you’re tough stuff

when like you grew up in suburbia and your parents love you and babied you and you have

a fucking horse.

Like what?

You don’t get to have those tattoos.

Okay, y’all know what I mean?

Like do you get what I’m saying?

Like you fucking people, you are not allowed to have these type tattoos.

Like you look so fucking stupid.

Like these people are covered in tattoos and they’re too scared to go ask for fucking ketchup

at a restaurant.

Like oh, I’m in my villain era.

No you’re a pussy.

Sit down.

Your fucking sleeve is cool, but you’re a fucking little care bear.

All right, I need to stop being so mean and dissing everybody.

I need to cool it.

I need to drink a little water.

Oh, fucking chill out.

But yeah, people are a lot more intentional behind the vibe they’re trying to put on.

I wish people would put more intention behind trying to be what they’re trying to look like.

Like actually embody it and actually become it than just fucking look like it.

But unfortunately that’s not the case because looking a certain way online gets you certain


So you don’t actually have to be that thing.

You can just look like it.

And everyone will still love you and think you’re great.

So a lot of people can control the way that they’re perceived online and they can shine

a better light on their self or like a tougher light on their self than is actually there.

Like these bitches that look witchy and they dress like very like hippie and they try and

look like witches.

They’re trying to do that.

Like I love those girls, but like they don’t just wake up with a wardrobe of fucking pentagram

necklaces and goddamn scarves and robes and shit that they wear.

Like no, like they’re intentionally trying to do that.

People’s style does not just happen.

Like they’re trying to look a certain way.

Okay, onto my next point because that just fucking derailed.

Like I really like that y’all like to hear me ramble because that’s one thing about me

is I’m a motherfucking ramble.

I’m gonna get off on a tangent and I’m gonna get off my point.

I always come back to it in a way.

Next thing I want to talk about is people’s bodies.

Like it goes with the appearance thing, but people’s bodies, like if someone is in really

good fucking shape, babe, it’s not by accident.

It’s not by fucking accident.

I promise you, I promise it’s not by accident.

They’re trying their ass off to look the way that they look like me.

I don’t even look that fucking great and you have no idea how much effort I put into looking

the way that I do.

So these people that look 10 times better than me, girl, I can’t even fucking imagine.

I cannot imagine how much more strict and like intentional they are with every fucking

move they make.

Like they probably jerk off at a certain speed so they can burn a certain amount of calories.

Like God damn, a lot of them don’t go out and a lot of them don’t drink and party and

do shit like that.

Like people, oh my God, the hot ones are so nuts.

Like the ones that have really, really good bodies are like muscular or like people that

are just in really, really good shape and they’re very fit.

Like y’all, they’re like the fucking, they’re a weird breed.


I really want to be like that, but I’m fucking busy.

I have too much shit to do to be like worried about every fucking micro detail of like how

I look like y’all.

I ain’t talking shit because if I was bored and had nothing to do, girl, sure shit, sure


I’d be the most perfect looking motherfucker you’ve ever seen in your life.

One day I’m going to get there.

One day I’m going to be so like tired of working on shit because I want to write a book now.

That’s like an X on my journey, but I’m going to be so tired of working on shit that I’m

going to just make myself my own like trophy husband.

Like I’m going to pay my own shit and be my own shit, but like, I’m just going to worry

about looking cute and going to branch and drinking Xanax smoothies.

Like there’s going to be a point in my life where all I focus on is my appearance, but

maybe, I don’t fucking know.

I think I’m just too like, my brain is too high maintenance for that.

I need more stimulation than just like eating, cleaning, working out, but people that work

out babe, they’re so much more intentional about it than you fucking think.

When I tell you every meal is counted for and what I mean by counted for is they’ll

eat like five, six meals a day and they will weigh out every single thing they eat.

I have to do this too, but these people with really, really like perfect bodies and are

in super good shape, they have to do this like 10 times more strict than I do it.

So I’ll like fuck around and weigh my rice and weigh my chicken and I just try to make

sure I eat like four to five times a day, make sure I get my protein in, but no, these

people want their fucking numbers hit and they will do what it takes to make sure they

hit their goddamn numbers.

Like they don’t fuck around.

They don’t take chances.

They don’t go out to eat.

They like do not fuck with that shit and if they do have a cheat day, it’s once in a goddamn


If you see really fit people that you see online posing with a cheeseburger or posing

with a pizza or like something, it’s like bitch half the time they don’t even eat it.

I’m sorry to say it.

Half the time they don’t even fucking eat the bad food that they’re showing.

They just take the picture with it because they want to like be cute and be trendy.

But even if they do eat it, they’re not eating it every day.

And let me tell you, when they go home, they are freaking the fuck out mentally because

they just had a piece of pizza.

They are like beating themselves up.

They’re going on the Stairmaster for the next fucking week and they’re fucking freaking


Oh my God, I ate a piece of pizza, I’m gonna fucking kill myself.

Like they literally like are next level with the shit and all their meals are calculated

and planned.

What they eat is planned.

How they work out is planned.

They all got their little fucking notebook journal shit at the gym or they got the notes

in their phone.

Like every move they make is calculated and that is such a draining fucking life to live

because I tried to live it and I fucking hated it.

Like I have a balance.

So like I’m very calculated with most things that I eat, but like I give myself a little

bit of freedom, you know, like I make sure I hit what I need to hit for like my protein

goal and my calories, but like I’m not as strict as these people.

So like, yeah, I look like I just have fun and I do whatever and I drink because I post

a lot of like shit with me drinking alcohol.

Y’all, when I drink, I make sure that I can and I make sure it’s not going to throw off

my fucking calories.

So I know that one shot of tequila because I only drink tequila.

One shot of tequila is a hundred calories.

So I know that going into the shit.

So I do not order sugary drinks.

I don’t order anything that’s like a drink.

I rarely order a drink, but if I do, it’s tequila soda with lime because that’s fucking

zero calories of like the liquid.

It’s just the hundred from the tequila, a hundred calories from the tequila.

So if I know I like to have between eight to 10 shots throughout the night because I’m

very big, it takes a lot to get me drunk and I have a tolerance like a motherfucker.

Sometimes it’s more than that, but that’s 800 to a thousand calories I know I’m going

to spend from drinking.

So I will do extra cardio at the gym and I will eat a little bit less throughout the


So like I’ll do 500 calories of cardio after my workout, 400, 500, whatever.

And then I’ll eat a little bit less throughout the day so that I know when I go out that

night, I’m not fucking up my calories and I’m not going to wake up fucking fat.

But I’m serious.

Like I take that into consideration of like my goals.

But other people that work out really, really hard and have these perfect fucking bodies,

take it to the next level.

Like they’re like, I’m not even going to drink tonight because I don’t want it to ruin my

workout tomorrow because tomorrow I’m not going to feel as energized.

I’m not going to sleep as good tonight, so I’m not going to have as good of a workout


If I feel hungover, I’m going to fuck up like what I’m going to do tomorrow.

Like these people don’t even go out and if they do, they have one or two drinks.

They don’t get drunk.

They have like the slightest little buzz, but like that’s it because they don’t want

to fuck their shit up, which is totally like respectable.

And I love that people have that level of self-discipline, but they don’t show that.

They don’t fucking show that online.

They don’t show how strict they’re actually being and they pretend that they like their


They’ll show a couple of meals, they’ll show a couple of things, but they don’t show anything

else that goes into it.

They don’t show the mental side of it.

They don’t show how they have to sacrifice having fun and going to restaurants and going

out and having friends and having a fucking social life.

They don’t show that.

They literally show their self eating their fucking meals, going to the gym and watching


Boring, but like that’s very respectable, but that’s the price that comes with having

a perfect body like that.

And then there are some people that have really, really good bodies that party a lot.

And let me fucking tell you, they are a lot more calculated about it than you think.

So just how I said, I’ll do the cardio, they will too.

Or they won’t eat that fucking day because you’ll get drunker faster on an empty stomach.

So I used to have a friend that was super muscular and she was in such good fucking

shape and I was like, bitch, how the fuck are you in such good shape?

Like you don’t fucking eat barely and you drink all weekend and she would eat very clean

throughout the week.

Very, very, very clean.

Her fucking chicken, she would eat high protein, but on the weekends she wouldn’t eat much

so that the alcohol would hit her harder so she could get to the same level of drunk with

half the calories.

But then she wasn’t even eating the calories like she was still in a negative even though

she was drinking.

So she was able to drink Saturday, Friday and Saturday and be fine.

You know what I mean?

Like there are a lot more calculated than you fucking think.

And you don’t know every micro detail of people’s lives, bro.

Like there’s so much more that goes into these people with the perfect fucking bodies

than you realize.

But a lot of them just make it seem like it’s accident or like they, you don’t know.

It’s so much harder than you think because as soon as you get on your fitness journey

or you try and start counting a macro or a calorie, you’re going to realize, God damn

this is annoying.

This is fucking annoying.

I’m tired of this.

I’m tired of this grandpa.

But literally that’s where I’m at.

Like I’m, I’ve done it so long.

I’ve done it since I’m 14 and I’ve just like had a general understanding of like what the

fuck’s going on.

But I’m not going to commit my life to being like miserable.

Like I’d rather prioritize looking not in perfect shape and still enjoy living my life,

you know, but some people looking in perfect shape is their enjoyment.

So it’s all subjective and it’s up to you.

But my whole point about all this fucking shit is that people don’t get muscular and

get in good shape by accident.

They’re training their fucking ass off and they’re being very, very calculated about

what they eat, when they eat, how they exercise.

There’s so much more that goes into it and it’s a lot harder than they’re going to fucking

warn you for.

And that’s why so many people fall off the wagon because they ain’t prepared for what’s


Like you think that you just need to hop on a wagon and keep rolling.

Really bitch, you got to hop on a train.

Like you got to fucking, you got to elevate and like it’s so much more.

It’s not a wagon, it’s a train babe.

So hop the fuck on the right one.

So one more idea that just popped into my head, okay, this one is like off the cuff,

but my last one is coming up next.

But this one is like another example of all this shit is like studying when you’re in


I dealt with this shit a lot where everybody just seemed to do so good on the tests.

And I was like, what the fuck, how?

Like there was a couple of people that always got A’s and I’m like, how the motherfuck are

you getting an A?

Like I studied my ass off for this and I got a C, what?

Like when you get into nursing school, there’s a whole, it’s a whole different way of like

taking tests.

Like you have to completely change the way that you answer questions and go about taking

a test because every answer is right, but it’s about which one’s the most right.

But that’s besides the point.

So after tests and shit, like I would go around to the people that made A’s and I would ask

them like, what the fuck are you studying?

Because I studied my ass off and I’m still doing bad.

And they would just be like so aloof about it.

Like, oh, I read the PowerPoints.

I studied the PowerPoints and I’m like, okay.

So like, huh, I did too.

So what do you mean you studied the PowerPoints and you read a little bit in the textbook?

Like I fucking did that too, but they didn’t tell me how long they read the PowerPoints

and how long and how many times they read the textbook because I stopped asking people

for advice and I just decided I’m going to figure this fucking shit out on my own because

what was working for everybody else was not working for me.

Typical how my fucking life goes.

So I cracked down and I was like, you know what?

I’m about to study these motherfucking PowerPoints for my next test.

And I sat down and I read the PowerPoints every single day, three times a day.

So I was spending around four hours a day reading these fucking PowerPoints basically

and studying for my tests for like the week before.

Like bitch, when I tell you I studied, I studied and then I made a fucking A because yeah,

all they told me was they read the PowerPoints.

But what I had to learn for myself was how many times.

Like I memorized the fucking PowerPoints by reading them three times a day for a week,

but it took me four hours a day to do that shit.

So like they just say I read the PowerPoints, but it’s a lot harder than you think.

It takes a lot more of, it’s like more than just reading the PowerPoints.

It’s studying the PowerPoints.

It’s fucking memorizing them.

Like when I went to real estate school and I took my real estate exam, I passed it on

the first try because I knew about studying, like going through nursing school.

I learned like, yeah, you might be studying the right thing, but you’re not like learning

it enough.

Like you need to like drill that shit into your brain.

So when I went into real estate school, I knew how to study and I was the only person

in my real estate class that passed the exam the first time because I read my entire textbook

again before I took the test.

So I sat down for a weekend for three days and I did nothing but read my fucking textbook

cover to cover and made sure I understood everything in that fucking book.

And I did that because I knew that’s what it takes to pass a fucking test.

Like if I really wanted to prepare and make sure I didn’t have to take it twice, I did

what it took.

But most people were not willing to put in the three days of effort that I did to reading

that fucking textbook.

Who wants to read a textbook?

Nobody, you know?

But when people would ask me, what did I do?

I could have just said, Oh, I read over my textbook and they would have thought, Oh,


I could have just like go scan over a couple of things and read a couple of sections.

They wouldn’t think that I read over the entire textbook.

You know what I mean?

So like people that are really smart and making A’s in class are doing a lot more work than

you fucking think.

They’re a lot more intentional with it.

And I hate when they hide their fucking secrets and they hide what they’re doing.

Like motherfucker, if you’re studying four hours a day, tell me, tell me that so I can

go do that.

So the last thing I want to talk about, people are more intentional about than you realize

is being positive and having a positive mindset.

So someone like me, I take a lot of time to look into things and journal about things.

And I take a lot of time looking into other perspectives.

Like my brain doesn’t just work the way it does.

And I don’t just automatically see the bright side of shit.

That’s not how our brains are wired one, but two, it seems so effortless with me.

Like, yeah, I vent.

Yeah, I rant.

But like, I always have a good point.

I always have a positive note to end on.

And that’s not just how I am.

That’s what I’ve had to teach myself to be and what I’ve had to like, work toward.

Because I get sad a lot.

And I go into the way that I feel.

I spend a lot more time with my emotions and in my head than people realize.

And my outlook on life was earned.

It was grown.

I achieved this like it’s not something that just happened to me like, oh, he’s just he

was just born smart.

No, I didn’t know shit when I was born.

I was a fucking little neck and mole rat.

Basically, that’s what babies are.

Like I just I didn’t know shit.

Like I had to learn it.

But people that are positive are a lot more intentional about being positive than you

think like they’re they’re intentionally looking for other perspectives.

They’re looking for other viewpoints.

They’re looking for other ways to see a situation so that they can feel better about it.

They don’t just automatically feel good about everything all the time.

People that are very positive, and that are able to stay motivated and keep going and

just have a like better mood, I guess they’re intentional about that.

They put a lot of fucking effort and work into that.

So if you’re someone that’s like, Okay, I want to feel better.

And I want to change the way that I think, bitch, buckle up, that shit’s hard.

You’re gonna fill up journals like every fucking couple weeks with shit that you just pour

out of your brain.

Like all the negative shit has to come out all the old perspectives that you hold have

to come out.

And then you have to question yourself for the new perspectives.

And those will fill your fucking journal up.

You have to be intentional about seeing different perspectives and experiencing different shit,

because your experiences come from your perception.

So if you change your perception of how you’re looking at something, it will change the way

you feel about it 100%.

But that’s a very intentional process.

It becomes easier as you do it more, but it’s still very much intentional.

You have to check yourself, you have to choose to think in certain directions, and about

certain things and in certain ways.

Like people that are just positive Polly’s are not positive Polly is just fucking because

like, oh, that’s just how they are.


And you’re not negative Nancy, just because she was born like that.

Like you, it takes effort to be the opposite.

So that’s where I’m gonna leave this off.

I have yelled at you guys enough.

I hope you guys like this episode.

If you like this podcast, I just have one request.

And it’s that you go leave me a five star rating.

Thank you so much.

If you want to keep up with me all of my social media will be linked in the description of

this podcast.

Also, if you are interested in one on one coaching with me, I have now created an application

process so it’s no longer just free to schedule.

I’m doing applications now to keep up with the demand because it just got too high.

So now I’m screening people basically to see who’s a good fit and who’s not.

Because I want to work with action takers.

I want to work with people that are serious about transforming their life.

Because the shit that I say y’all know, that’s what it’s for.

And where I specialize is with the people that have been looking for answers they can’t

find and the people that have been trying shit and it’s just not working.

I’m the person that those people can go to.

So if you’re interested in that, I will put the link to the application in the description

box also.

And I want to make it very clear that you’ve already got what it takes to get through what

you’re dealing with or to improve your life or to reach your goals.

And I’ll help you see that.

And it’s going to be a lot easier when you got me in your corner because that’s exactly

how I want it to feel.

I want it to feel like you have someone that has your back and like I’m in your corner

because that’s what it is.

Like I’m there for you and I’m there to do shit with you.

But anyways, thank you so much for listening.

Please stay safe and take care of yourself.

And I will talk to you next Sunday.