Aware & Aggravated - 24. How To Make Friends

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Hi friends, so this episode is all about making you some friends. I’m gonna teach you everything

I fucking know and it’s a whole bunch

I promise and I hope I’m able to share some things that you haven’t heard of before and I really really hope at the end

of this episode you feel a little bit more excited and

prepared and like equipped with the knowledge and ideas to go out and make some goddamn friends because I know exactly how it is to

Feel lonely as shit and these are all the things I’ve learned and I hope they can help you

So I’m gonna start off with a couple tips and just general things and then I’m gonna get straight into

Where to meet motherfuckers and where to actually make friends where to go what to do and how to do it

But the first thing I want to say is like a reassuring thing. You’re not the only one looking for connection

I promise you that you’re not the only one that’s looking for friends

I know it feels like that sometimes but you’re not the only one that wants to make friends and that’s looking for people

To have in their life

It’s a lot more common than you think people just don’t talk about it

Like for some reason it’s weird to want to make friends like there’s just a weird fucking stigma around it

But I want to reassure you that you’re not crazy and you’re not alone and other people are looking for friends, too

It’s not just you

Because the messages I’ve received in the last like six months

I’ve had at least 50 people ask me to make a podcast episode about making friends

Since I started this fucking thing and

I’m not exaggerating like at least 50 at least 50 people have messaged me asking for it. So here it fucking is

So the first thing I really need you to get is that there is a potential for connection all around you all the time


Realized this at the beach the other day

I went to the beach with a couple of my friends and I was just looking around at all the people on the beach

And I was like Leo you literally could walk up to any of these people right now

Start talking to them and maybe become friends with any of them that possibility is there but I’m choosing not to

So I’m choosing to sit here on my little fucking towel and hang out with my little group and not

Go out and find more friends, which is fine

but my whole point of bringing this up is to make it clear that

There’s potential for connection all around you

But you need to realize you’re choosing not to act on it. You’re choosing not to go up to people

I know there’s plenty of reasons why I fucking get it, but we got to realize

What is actually in our control so that we can feel empowered to do something about it?

But that is in our control. I could have gotten up and talked to any fucking buddy

I wanted to but I did it but that was my choice and reminding myself and seeing it as a choice

Is what’s gonna make you feel better about moving forward with everything?

I’m about to say like you have to take accountability first

So go into where to meet friends. You need to get clear with yourself on what kind of friend you want

Do you want a friend that you go to the gym with do you want like a fit friend like a workout friend?

Do you want a business friend someone that’s like an entrepreneur and doing their shit? Do you want successful friends?

Do you want party friends friends to go party with and go get fucked up and like go to clubs and shit?

Is that a type friend you want or do you want a friend that’s just gonna hang out with you in your day-to-day?

and have deep talks and whatever it is like just get clear on what you want a friend for and

What you want your friend to be able to do because I’m just gonna tell you it’s a lot more difficult than you think

to find

Friends with range. I have a couple thank fucking God, but I do a lot of shit like I’m into fitness

I’m into business

I like to party sometimes when it’s not gonna fuck up the rest of the shit that I’m working on

But I like to go to raves and concerts and stuff. I like to travel

I like to have really deep talks as you fucking know

And I’m very like clean with the way that I eat and I’m very conscientious about my health

But I do all of those things and it’s very difficult to find someone with that level of range

Cuz typically the people that party a lot

Don’t take into consideration their health and the people that are fucking fitness nuts are not

Really gonna be down to go out and party with you

So it’s like you got to figure out what you want friends for and then find different friends to fill different slots

So if you want a workout friend and a fit friend focus on finding a fit friend

There’s gonna be different places. You can go to meet these type people

Versus if you want a party friend or a friend that’s gonna travel with you or you want another friend

That’s very into deep talks

so that’s my first step is get clear on what you want a friend for and realize one friend is not enough because

People do not have typically the range


Some people do that are into a lot of things and if you only have one friend that does have range

You’re gonna be fucking lonely when they’re busy. So you need multiple

You need a lot of

resources and people to like

hang out with and do shit with because when one’s busy you got another one and when you have a falling out with one of

Them where you have an argument or whatever

it doesn’t seem like the end of the fucking world and you’re not gonna get too enmeshed or too like

Treating it like a relationship and shit, you know

So when you go to make friends, this is my first fucking tip and it’s a bigger tip than most people realize

What you’re wearing

Says a lot and can help you a lot

So when you go out and you’re in the mood to go like meet new people and have friends

Where what the fuck is gonna make you feel confident?

But also wear something a little weird or something that expresses a certain interest of yours

So some people are in the fucking anime. I don’t fuck with anime

I don’t get it, but some people are into that shit

So wear something fucking anime

So that other people that like anime will see it on you and they’ll see you have something in common and then they’ll feel

Instantly drawn to you. And if you’re not someone that’s very outgoing

That gives someone like me who is outgoing a reason to come up and talk to you

If you look cool or you seem interesting or whatever

It is like give people a reason to come and talk to you. Give them a conversation opener if you’re not very outgoing

Another good idea is having merch for some of your favorite shit like the podcast call her daddy

They have merch and it’s like the daddy gang

So like when you see people out in public that are wearing the call her daddy merch, you know

Their brain works a certain way, you know, they have a certain set of knowledge

You know, they have a certain sense of humor and you know, you’ll get along if you both enjoy listening to that same podcast

so that’ll easily make you feel like

Connected to people but you have to wear shit to let them know that you have something in common

Like don’t do nothing crazy. Don’t be out there with it and don’t be a fucking weirdo about it

But that’s a good way for people to open up conversation or you can open up conversation with other people

about it like mentioning something that they’re wearing that you both have in common and

Also, if you look fucking cute, it gives someone an opportunity to compliment you

So girls trying to make friends that are girls like bitch wear something cute be hot and don’t worry about girls being intimidated by you

You don’t want friends that are intimidated

Anyways, you want friends that are gonna hype you up and tell you you look fucking hot if you look fucking hot

so like dress where you feel confident, but dress like

Complimentable and then wear something that is like letting people know you have something in common like express your interests through what you’re wearing

A little bit. I’m not the motherfucker to ask about that. I wear all black. I don’t like logos. I don’t like branding

I don’t like you to be able to tell like what shit is on me. So I don’t want anyone to know my interests

so I’m not like the one to

Practice what I preach on this one

But this is a really good idea for other people because I’m someone that’s very outgoing and I don’t feel comfortable letting people know things

About me, but people wearing shit that I know of it makes me feel confident and comfortable to go up and talk to them

And open up conversation because if I see someone wearing teal swan merch that she’s a spiritual guru

I fucking love that bitch with my whole heart if I saw someone wearing her merch

I would run up to them immediately and I’m not letting you walk away not being friends with me

Like I’m gonna get your number. We’re gonna fucking hang out. I did that one time

Actually, I saw someone wearing a mask when kovat was like a fucking thing

And I was like, oh my god, it’s a teal swan fucking frequency mask and I went up to the guy and I was like

Yo, I was like, is that a teal swan mask?

And he was like, I don’t know my sister gave it to me like what is that?

And I was like, oh, never mind, but my point is I saw someone

Wearing something that I thought was from someone I was so interested in and I ran up to them immediately

So give people the chance to do that by expressing what the fuck you’re into

Okay, so my next tip is to go places regularly

So if you go to a coffee shop go to the same fucking coffee shop if you go to like a little restaurant

Go to the same places like over and over and become like a familiar face in these places

so there’s a couple reasons I say this and one of them is because if you get along well with the staff and

You start like shooting shit every day or like there’s this bar

I go to downtown and the girl behind the counter her name’s Shania and like we get along so well and we just bullshit

But like we’re friends now because I’ve consistently gone in there

Like she’s fun as fuck and like we just shoot shit back and forth but getting to know the staff at places

Can help you a lot


Another thing with that is like go alone like going out to eat alone if you like your waiter and they’re like all these they

Seem fucking cool. There’s a lot of young people that are waiters and waitresses if you’re young looking for friends

But if you hit it off with a waiter or a waitress

Fucking be like, oh my god, you’re fun as shit. Let’s be friends like at the end like I’m leaving my number

I’m gonna check for you. Let’s be friends like you can just hit it off with people

That’s just kind of an example of like how to meet someone but being consistent as my point on this one is like go to places

Regularly, it’s like the coffee shop go to the same fucking one

Talk to the same people get known by people or even just become a frequent face that people see because when people see you

Consistently they see a familiar face. You’re familiar to them

They’re comfortable with you being there and that opens up the possibility

For them to relax and break the communication barrier if you don’t first, so that’s another point

I’m gonna get into is breaking the communication barrier and I’m gonna teach you some ways to fucking do that

but being a familiar face is more important than you think and especially with

Like more like trendy places

Like there’s this restaurant that I go to called George Bistro and I’ve gone there for a long time

you know my sister and my dad like we fucking love that place and

We’ve gotten to know the waitstaff and my personality

I get along with fucking everybody and if we get along we get the fuck along like if you get my humor bitch

We’re besties. So there’s been multiple times that the staff like they’re cute at that restaurant. They’ll go out together

so like at the end of their shifts on weekends and shit a

Couple of the staff will like go out together

Like go to a bar and go hang out and they’ve invited me a couple of times

I’ve been busy and I really want to go hang out with them because they’re cool as fuck

But that’s just something that is an easy way to make friends

Like if you’re going to eat at these places you become friends with the staff you become like familiar with them

They see your personalities cool you get along

Well, that’s a perfect way to go and meet friends and hang out with people because if you go

With this certain waiter or two waiters waitresses that you really like you’ll meet other ones. You’ll meet friends

You already know you bond. You already know that you’re comfortable with each other. You’re a familiar face. They seem like

Familiar to you because they are so that’s easy fucking gold for making friends. Is that

Okay. So remember when I just talked about breaking the communication barrier

I’m gonna talk about this at the gym because the gym is a great place to meet friends and

Especially if you want someone that’s into fitness and into like a healthy lifestyle and working on their goals and shit

So at the gym, it’s the same kind of thing if you go to the gym at the same time

Relatively every day you’re gonna start seeing the same people that go at that time

They’re gonna start becoming familiar to you. You’re gonna start becoming a familiar face to them now

It’s gonna be a lot easier to break the communication barrier with them. So a big fucking tip I have


Anything anywhere not just at the gym. I cannot tell you how fucking far it goes just to acknowledge

Someone exists if you look at them in their eyes and smile at them

Just smiling at them and looking them in their eyes lets them know that you see them

okay, that’s bigger than you fucking think because everybody’s so busy busy busy go go go and just

Like that’s an acknowledgement as looking them in their eyes and smiling at them. That’s acknowledging them

you can even say hi just fucking saying hi with a smile is

Bigger than you realize you don’t have to like say hi expecting a conversation

You can just say hi like and keep walking or whatever it is or just like get back to whatever you’re doing

That person now feels comfortable with you because this woman did it to me

I don’t know if I’ve talked about this on the podcast yet


This woman did it to me on my flight to Cabo like typically when you get in a plane you just sit down and shut

The fuck up. Well, that’s what I do

but this woman like went and sat down next to me and she just looked at me and smiled real big and was like

Hi, like just a real friendly. Hi, and I was like hi and then she just finished putting her shit away

I went back to like fucking with my air pods and then we just sat there

But I felt so comfortable because there wasn’t that awkward silence of like, oh we haven’t acknowledged each other

It’s like it was broken

She broke that and made it comfortable and then we ended up talking and like I initiated

Conversation because I felt comfortable too because she acknowledged my fucking existence and then we ended up talking a lot throughout the flight and

I fucking miss her and I love her and like we bonded

But just saying hi and acknowledging someone is bigger than you think so, especially at the fucking gym

This is gonna get easier and easier

So for guys and girls, you’re able to like look at each other and smile just a friendly fucking smile

Whatever that’s great smile as as the days go by and you start seeing people more smile at them say hi

Say what’s up? Acknowledge them? Whatever like guys with a little fucking like chin up at each other like what’s up?

That’s very common. So that’s a good thing. That’s acknowledgement

but a couple things you can say at the gym to break the communication barrier is

Tell someone you like their shoes

Ask someone where they got something be like yo, that’s sick

Where did you get that whether whatever the fuck it is?

I don’t care if they have a fucking slim Jim like it just find something about them

You like or something that they’re wearing that you like me like yo, that’s sick

Where’d you get it because you’re gonna make them feel good and you asked where’d you get it?

So you don’t need to have a full fucking conversation

All you need to do when you break the barrier of communication is just break the barrier

So like this guy I told one time at the gym

I was like, yo, your sleeves are sick and he was like, oh, thank you, bro

And I was like, yeah most people with sleeves like the sleeves be wearing them

But you wearing the fuck out of those they look good and I made him laugh and then I like he was like, thanks

And he got like flat our knees cool and whatever and then it’s like I left

I had no intention of having any further conversation

Like I just wanted to let him know that his fucking sleeves were cool break that barrier cuz it’s like when you’re alone in the

Locker room, it’s fucking weird. So I’ll just like speak to you. So like I made him feel good about himself

He likes his tattoos

But now it’s like whenever we see each other at the gym, it’s like what’s up, buddy?

It’s like the barrier was broken and now it’s cool. And now it’s fun

But that’s the point is just fucking speak to them speak at them

Another thing you can ask someone in the gym to break that barrier

You just want to talk to them is walking up to them if they’re on a machine between sets

don’t fucking do it in the middle of their set and

Be like yo, are you using this and point to something next to them and get on it or be like yo

How many sets you got left and then just be like, okay cool. No rush. No worries

Just let it fucking be but you broke that communication, you know

like you fucking talked to them and now you can walk off like you don’t have to

Go into making friends and like have a full fucking conversation with people

You can just acknowledge them break that communication barrier and then see them the next day

So it’s gonna escalate like every day you see them after you break the communication barrier

Just find a way to acknowledge them every day every other day, whatever it is, but it’s just gonna get more and more in-depth

And you never know what’s gonna come of it

Like you literally have no fucking clue because I’ve been invited to shit

I’ve been invited to parties and it’s like girl like thanks, but like fuck no

I don’t go to no strangers parties

but my whole point is you never know where it’s gonna go where it’s gonna lead to and you don’t have to have a

Full conversation when you go to meet somebody that’s a big thing

You’re able to just acknowledge them and keep moving keep on your fucking way. You don’t have to have a full conversation

Let it happen organically

Let it happen naturally if it’s you like you keep seeing people at the same place like the gym now

If you see someone out one time and you know, they’re probably not gonna see them again

you need to like put a little more effort into having more of a conversation but like at the gym you can just like

Bullshit and see where it goes

okay, so my next tip for finding a friend look at what you’re into find your hobbies or your interests or whatever it is because

There’s a couple things that I’ve been wanting to try and I’m like, I know they’re on my list


but making friends is not my priority right now, but a couple things on my list are yoga because I really want to try yoga

And the people that do yoga are usually like with it to a certain extent like awareness wise so or they’re spiritual

So that’s like a good place to meet people like that. I thought about volleyball because I’m I love a volleyball

I’m very competitive like tennis and shit

Um, my town does a run club every Wednesday like they everyone meets downtown at a certain spot and day

Everybody just runs like three miles together girl. I ain’t running no three fucking miles right now

I’m gonna have to fucking work my endurance up before I try and go join some fucking run club

Like who do I think I am?

But that’s a good way to get around people

But to have an activity to do same with cycling classes like if you want to go to a cycle class

You’re around people with an activity so that’s like a really really good and comfortable thing is

When you’re fucking around people, but you have something to do so you have a reason to interact

But that’s not your only reason for talking to them

Like you does that make sense like you have an activity to do and you can talk but talking is not the only reason that

You’re near each other and interacting. It’s like walking up to someone at a bar

It’s like bitch have something to do don’t just come up and talk to me because it’s awkward

I’m talking about people in general. Like if you guys ever recognize me in public come fucking say hi. I don’t care

I don’t give a fuck how weird is it? I’ll buy you a drink. Well if I could take a picture

Don’t ever be scared to come up to me

but make it clear that you know me from like my podcast or tick-tock or something because I’m not approachable in

Like bars or like out in public. So like if you recognize me just if you see me looking like a fucking asshole

That’s just how I am. That’s just my external shell. So if you come up to him like hey, it’s like Leo

I know you from tick-tock or I know you from your podcast or like a whatever

I’ll immediately drop that like facade and I’ll be like, oh my god. Hi

But I have that facade so people leave me the fuck alone. But yeah, that’s just my heads up on that

But yeah, my point with going to all these classes and shit is like that’s that’s plenty of places to meet people

That’s things to do and with finding things to do another thing that kind of goes along with that is

Like finding someone that you can do an activity with so

examples of this are like an acting coach if you want some kind of coach or like

shit for acting or singing or whatever or a fucking trainer at the gym or a

Lash lady a nail lady your barber your hairstylist, whatever it is

it’s like these people that you’re around you’re forced to be around them and

Communicate with them and talk to them and engage and interact it’s so much easier to make a connection off of that

opposed to like I said before of just not having a reason to be around each other because you have a chance to get to

Know each other for a certain amount of time like when I go to my barber

Me and him are cool as fuck me and him are like friends as shit because I’m with you

For an hour every fucking week like we’re gonna hang out

We’re gonna get to know each other and like we haven’t hung out like outside of the chair yet

Like I’m just busy and he catches me at the wrong fucking time and he got a wife and shit and like we’d be partying

in different ways so

Like we try to hang out a lot

it just doesn’t line up but my point is

It’s like get to know the people that you have to be around because it’s like school friends

like you know when you were in school and you all had to be around each other and it was just easy to fucking like

Make friends because you were forced to be around each other use those opportunities

Because that’s how you’re trained to make friends from growing up like being around people at school

You were forced to be around them

So use that to your advantage

Be friends with all the people you have to be around and my other little thing about that is like jobs like your co-workers and shit

You have to be around them might as well make it fucking fun

and if you’ve worked with certain people for a long time and you don’t really know how to like

Bring up hanging out like just throw it in fucking conversation

Like oh my god, we should hang out or like if someone comes to you about gossip like oh bitch the way you talk shit

We need to hang out

We need to get drinks or like say something like that

but also if there’s people at your work that you want to talk to that you’re just like around but

You don’t really how to talk to them

Just fucking find a way to break the communication

Like I said, if you need something if you need to ask them for something do it

but the more you can see them and the more you can like put yourself around them the better and

If there’s just like this unspoken person you want to hang out with and you’ve seen them for a long time be like, yo

You intrigue me for some reason I feel drawn to you. So let’s hang out

I think we meant to be friends like just say some kind of fucking joke or like open it up

Well, I’m gonna come sit by you today like something just something to like get around them

Something I just thought about that is the most bonding experience and is the best way to meet someone new is

Fucking smoking a blunt together

If you’re someone that smokes bitch, that is your way in tell someone you want to smoke with them

Because that is a fat-ass compliment because there’s certain people you just can’t smoke with you know

I mean like you want to be in good company when you’re smoking a fucking blunt and that’s just such a bonding experience

It’s so cutesy and you guys could talk about all kind of shit because your brains both gonna start like tweaking

You’re gonna be thinking all kind of shit. So that’s perfect. Literally just tell someone you want to smoke with them

But if they don’t smoke be like, oh, whatever. Let’s get drinks then and if I say, oh, I don’t drink

Okay, then what do you do? Cuz clearly I’m trying to be a friend. You know what I mean? Like just be funny

So my next piece of advice for people that want to find like business friends. This is what I’ve thought of to do

So, you know how there’s like business seminars and shit and like people will put on big like group events

And you can go like watch people speak and it’s just like little business events and you have to pay

Some of them are like a hundred bucks and some of them are like five thousand bucks to go to I ain’t going to the

Fucking expensive ones. Yeah, like I’m tripping over like 150 all the fucking tickets

But those are great places to go network and meet people that are business minded and are trying to grow their business

Or become an entrepreneur

so that’s something I’ve been looking into recently is finding out where upcoming seminars are gonna be and then planning to travel to them because

Even if you meet people that are in different places than you you never know where they’re from and it’s good to have

Connections everywhere because you never know where you’re gonna end up because right now

I’m in a place where I want to fucking move and I’m thinking Houston, but I’m not sure for sure where I want to move

So it’s like if I go to a seminar and I meet some really fucking cool people and I’m like, where do you live?

and they’re like, oh Chicago or

California I’m like, okay. Well here I come like now I want to move there because now I have people there, you know

So you never know what’s gonna come of it?

So don’t just immediately shut it off in your mind

But that’s a really good place to go to meet business minded people is seminars and little events and shit

And what I said about having connections and meeting people that could be anywhere. That’s where social media will come in

So that’s a great way to make friends is social media

Finding people that have the same interests as you Facebook groups are really fucking underrated thing because there’s local Facebook groups

For all kind of shit like any interest you have is a fucking Facebook group for it

So literally go on any fucking Facebook group that you find an interest in and join it and just talk shit

See who’s in there post some shit like just see who you meet and see you like who catches your attention

But when you immediately have something to bond over you don’t have to fake conversation. You have something to talk about

But there’s also local groups

Like I said, so if you find people that are in your city or in a city nearby

You can fucking travel and see them or like hang out with them if they’re in your city

That’s a great way to make friends

but like also social media like not even just Facebook groups like Instagram tik-tok like there’s plenty of ways to meet people and

Me posting on tik-tok has helped me meet a lot of cool-ass people

like I have a lot of internet friends now because I’ve gotten online and

Posted shit and like revealed my personality and people just like what I have to say and they like me

And it’s made it really easy

Honestly, so even though other people live in different cities when I travel to different cities

We can hang the fuck out like I have people to hang out with

Anywhere I go if I travel somewhere and that’s the best fucking feeling ever like to feel like you have someone somewhere

Anywhere you could go visit like that’s the fucking best shit ever

And even if I didn’t have someone I could make a post like yo who the fuck is in whatever city

Let’s hang out or I’m gonna be here. Let’s hang out

So, yeah

Definitely utilize social media

Put effort into the connections that are with the people that you want or with people that are working towards the same shit as you


One thing I just thought of people are like obsessed with their fucking pets

So take your pet out if you have a dog take your fucking pet out

People have like a weird obsession with like their animals. I love cat. Okay, I love animals

I would never hurt an animal but some people have like a weird fucking fetish for their dog. I don’t get it

I really don’t get it but use that to your advantage if you want to go out and like meet people

That’s a really good way to like break

The tension and break the awkward like people will approach any fucking animal they see and if you’re on the other end of the leash

It’s like boom you instantly have a reason to start talking to them

And if they seem cool, and if they have a dog be like, oh my god

They need to have a playdate like and then just hang out with them and but make it about that fucking dog

You know what? I mean? Like there’s plenty of ways to

convert that into a friendship

But like if you don’t want someone that’s obsessed with their fucking animal

Then probably don’t because I don’t have no goddamn dog

And I don’t want no friends with dogs because I don’t want no friends what responsibilities holding them down like that

You know, it’s like people with kids like people my age with kids

I don’t have friends that have kids like we don’t hang out

Like I know people and I’m not mean to people just because they have a kid but that does not mesh with my lifestyle

I’m not someone that wants the responsibility of oh

I need to remember to go home and take my fucking dog out so we can go piss or I have a whole

Ass baby at home. I can’t do XYZ

I like the freedom of being able to get the fuck up and run away any moment

I want and I can’t do that if I have a child or if I have a dog or like some animal that I cannot just

Throw in a little fucking carrier and run away cuz cat can come with me

She’s very low maintenance and I love it

But does that make sense like if you want a friend you need to find out who’s compatible with you as a friend because if

You’re someone that’s 24 and you meet some other bitch. That’s 24 and she has a child like you’re on very different pages

She’s got a lot more to take into consideration

It is not gonna be able to do as much as you could do

So they could be a good friend to have but they might not be your like closest friend and that’s okay

And another thing about being picky with the friends that you have

You need to make a list of like non-negotiables or like shit that you are

Looking for and shit that you would not put up with and a friend

The types of friends that I stay away from now are people that are constantly partying or

Drinking on weekdays, like why the fuck are you drinking on weekdays that are not Friday?

You know what?

I mean

Like I I’m too busy and doing too much shit to have like my mental state altered or to feel hungover

Like on a weekday like sure two years ago, and I was going through a lot of shit. I was like drinking non-stop. I was

Entertaining extracurricular things. I don’t know what the fuck to call it

Like I’m free to I have like free speech on my podcast, right?

I don’t know like doing drugs bitch. So like there was a time in my life where I was going through so much shit

I just had to escape my reality and cope through it. It’s the only way I felt like I could do it

Like I was like drinking and drugging like every fucking weekend and it would like bleed into the weekdays sometimes

But the friends I made that I was doing that with are no longer the friends that I have

I no longer hang out with them because I’ve changed and I want more for my life and I’m now

Incompatible to those people because I don’t drink and drug every weekend

I drink like every other weekend maybe but I don’t get drunk like I used to and don’t do drugs often

Like I don’t do Molly and coke and shit. Like it’s not my fucking thing. It stresses me the fuck out

I don’t like it. Like I’ve stopped doing it at festivals and shit too

Like I’ll do mushrooms or I’ll do like acid, but I’m not doing like crazy fucking shit anymore

Like I’m just over it

But my whole point behind that is the friends that you make when you’re doing that type shit when you want more from life

You’re gonna have to make new friends and that’s what I’ve had to do

Now I believe in balance. Okay, cuz I still do certain things. I still drink. I still party. I still have fun

I do raves, but I also prioritize what the fuck I’m doing and I want people around me that also are able to do that

But yeah

I had a big period where I was fucking alone with nobody because all the friends I had

Were just party friends and they didn’t know how to like

Not be under the influence of something

So like when I tried to get my shit together and when I started like making

Different decisions and I started trying to make a business and grow my social media

It’s like I didn’t have time to do those things anymore

So that’s one of my non-negotiables now is like I don’t want friends that

Drink every fucking day or do drugs and a very frequent basis. Like I don’t want that shit

I want people that are like level-headed and driven and working towards shit like I am but will let loose when they want to you


Another thing like I said is kids like someone that has kids

I’m not gonna not be friends with you because you have a kid but you’re not gonna be a very close close friend to me

That I hang out with all the time because kids are fucking inconvenient for the lifestyle that I want to live

That’s why I don’t have one

Like I want fucking kids so bad

But I know the way that I want to live and I know what I need to put my energy into right now

So finding friends on the same page as you and finding friends that want to invest their time and energy into the same things as

You with like similar priorities is your best bet. So find the ones

That are on the same fucking path as you because if you don’t and you try and force

Friendships with people that are not working towards the same thing. You are they’re gonna snatch you away from what you want to do

It’s just how it goes. It’s not gonna seem like obvious but

Skipping what you’re wanting to do to go out and party or whatever

It’s only gonna happen so many times before it starts like really fucking with your progress and like holding you back from what you want

but another non-negotiable for me is someone who only fucking works out and is a health nut like

if you can’t have fun and like let loose and do shit with me if you’re always just gonna be uptight and boring and

You can’t go to a fucking restaurant because you have to like weigh your fucking meals

Oh my god, bro

Like I have to fucking eat only four ounces of chicken

Like no, I’m not I don’t fucking hang out with people like that like a little perfectionist

No, I like to actually feel like it’s okay to be human and being around people like that. It ain’t fun

That’s like a non-negotiable for me too. Like I’m very fucking picky with my friends, but there’s nothing wrong with it

Nothing wrong with it at all because I’m gonna encourage you to be the same way

Because friends really have the potential to hold you back or help you move forward

So it’s very very important that you fucking choose wisely

so my next tip is

Go to shit you’re invited to and even if you seem like oh my god

I really just don’t want to fucking go to this you never know who you’re gonna meet and you never know what’s gonna happen

So start saying yes to shit. Okay. I mean if you really are just like no

This is not gonna go anywhere good and you just like resent it and you really do not want to do it

Then don’t go but if you’re just like

Then make yourself go because you never know who you’re gonna fucking meet and that’s one of my best tips for like

Going out and doing shit, even if you have a friend that you’re not like super close with

like kind of use them to

Get you out and about so whenever I’m out in public by myself. I’m a lot more

Hesitant to talk to people than I am when I’m with someone so like when I feel safe and comfortable

Like I have someone with me

I’m a lot more outgoing and willing to talk and shoot shit and like engage in conversation and start up conversation

I don’t know why that is

but if you’re the same way

use a friend that you have to go be social in other settings and like to go do things like I

Call it having a home base. Like when I go out, I like to have the people

I know I’m gonna be out with

But then I’ll like go frolic around and like meet new people

Flirt fuck around and like I’ll just do my thing like I’ll just like social butterfly my ass around

But I feel comfortable to do that because I have my home base of the people. I know I’m out with

But do that

So like even if you don’t want to go to this fucking event or you don’t want to go to this thing or whatever it

Is if you have one friend that you know, that’s going then go with them because they’re gonna be your little home base

For when you’re there

You’ll feel comfortable to just talk to other people that are there and shoot shit and you don’t know who you’re gonna meet

so you never know the connections you’re gonna make fucking go because the nights that I’ve met people that I’m like

the tightest with are

The nights where I’m like, I really just don’t feel like I fit in

I don’t feel like I fucking belong and I’ve met some really cool fucking people

So that’s my biggest tip is use the fucking friends you got and go to the shit. You’re invited to

so this next tip is

My biggest one after you make a connection with somebody you need to fucking hang out with them very soon

After like next day two days later

You need to fucking set up some time for you to hang out again

If you meet someone out partying or whatever schedule a fucking like let’s hang out tomorrow or let’s hang out in two days

Let’s go grab lunch. Whatever the fuck it is find a way to

Stay connected to them and stay like on their mind and like I swear just hang out fucking quick because if you don’t hang out

Quick right after you meet them. You’re not gonna fucking hang out. I don’t know what it is

It’s this weird fucking like cosmic thing, but you don’t meet someone and then hang out a month later

That doesn’t happen

If you don’t hang out with them relatively quickly after you met them for the first time and establish that connection

You’re gonna lose it. I’m just gonna go ahead and warn you. I’ve been through that shit too many fucking times and

also, if you’re gonna meet someone that’s out like

Partying or whatever and they’re drunk and they talk about hanging out and it’s like if you make an effort to hang out with them

When they’re not drunk and they kind of blow it off. Let it go. Let it fucking go

Do not try and force it because a lot of people talk shit and run their fucking mouth

About hanging out when they’re drunk

So if you’re gonna make plans make them when you’re sober and make them when other people are sober. Oh

another tip remember when I said about

Wearing something cool and wearing something that you can like relate to people with or something that people could talk to you about

Look at people’s fucking tattoos because if someone got something tattooed on them, it’s very important to them

So make sure you like look at people’s tattoos and take an interest in them

That’s something a lot of people don’t do is you can like ask people about their tattoos what they are

What they mean if you recognize something that you like see that you both have something in common great

That means it’s very important to them

That’s your fucking shoe in with them have how to open up conversation how to talk to them

Whatever it is or like walk up to someone with a tattoo like yo, is that XYZ?

What I like an anime fucking shit is the best example like yo, is that fucking I don’t even know animation

It’s even give me an example

But like you get what I mean

If it’s like a symbol that you fucking recognize or whatever like yo, is that that and they’ll be like, yeah

and then most people will like go into a story or go into something about it and they’ll keep the

Conversation going or you can just be like, yo, it’s fucking sick

I love XYZ to or be like, I know that’s how your coolest shit. We need to be friends and be like, here’s my number

Let’s hang out. You literally have to just fucking go for it

It’s not as fucking awkward as you think and people are just as excited as you are

When you’re talking to them about something that they’re interested in because like if someone came up to me about

One of my tattoos I have no tattoos, honestly

But like if I had some spiritual shit tattooed on me and someone came up to me and recognized what it was

I would be like, oh my fucking god, like I would be so excited that someone just recognized it

So that’s my reassurance to you is like when you’re talking to someone or you’re noticing something about them

You’re instantly gonna feel close and bonded and like drawn to each other for it. I promise you just gotta fucking do it

But another thing with that is like how I said, let’s be friends

Like you have to tell people like yo, like let’s be fucking friends. You’re cool as shit

You have to express that you want to be friends

I know that’s scary and it’s risky

But like I said with the whole familiar thing if you keep seeing people and you get more comfortable and familiar with them

It’s a lot easier to say that but if you just throw the word friend in you’re good

And if you’re interested in talking further express that if you’re interested in hanging out again

Express that but yo, let’s get lunch. You seem cool as shit

I want to keep talking but let them know that you’re

Interested in getting to know them better and be friends or whatever it is people love that shit

Like if someone fucking said that to me like I instantly fucking love you

You know, like oh my god, you like me the fact that people like me makes me like them

And that’s how everybody is. It’s human psychology. So remember that

so I have a couple more tips, but a really really big one is

Be your fucking self

Do not try to be

What you think people would like or what other people would want you to be don’t try to be that

Be fucking you because when you meet people

That’s what you want them to meet you want them to like you for who you are and the way you show up

Genuinely not for some image you’re putting on that’s creates distance

You’re never gonna feel close to people like that and

It will speed up the full process of you finding friends that actually will be like good friends to you and will like you for


Like it will make it so much easier for you to make friends and find friends because the people that like you for you are

Getting to experience you right off the bat. So the people that like who you truly are are gonna be drawn to you

Immediately, so you’re fucking good, you know

And when you meet new people

it’s so much easier to set up boundaries with them than it is to set up boundaries with people that

Already know you or like you have a past with because they just it’s it’s harder to like go back and act different than what?

They know

Versus setting something up from the get-go of like these are my boundaries. This is what I like

This is what I don’t like it’s easier to do that with new people

Like out the gate so they know what to expect and they know what they’re getting into

They know how to treat you from the fucking get-go. That’s great

That’s very important and it’s easy to do when someone’s meeting you for the first time

So when I say be you be you set your fucking boundaries be clear about what you do and don’t like don’t be fucking mean

But like just give people the chance to get to know the actual you and see if the true

You is who they want to be friends with and you have to do the same to them

Like you want them to show you them?

So you can see if you actually want to be friends or not, like don’t fucking catfish them

So if you’re worried about rejection and shit, this is something that happened to me the other day when I was at the beach

So there were these volleyball nets and I wanted to play volleyball so fucking bad and like me and my friends were walking up to

Go to the bathroom and order drinks and shit and we had to walk past the volleyball court and there was four guys

Playing so two on each side and when I walked by I was like, yo

if you guys find a third like I want to play so they all looked at me and

Didn’t say a fucking word and I just kept walking

Like they literally like blew me the fuck off. Like I didn’t just say shit, but I expressed my interest in playing

It doesn’t always mean you’re gonna line up with people that are gonna be receptive to that or will be nice to you

Like they didn’t acknowledge me, but I don’t give a fuck that says more about them than it says about me like, okay

I’ll go ask the next fucking group to play volleyball suck my dick, you know

But just because someone doesn’t like return the favor, it doesn’t fucking mean anything like it’s not a big deal

Like you guys are just little shits like fuck you

Like I really like I genuinely didn’t care like I just thought to myself. Okay, you fucking dumb fucks

I think I said that out loud, but I didn’t say where they could hear it

But like I just kept walking going about my fucking day

Like I wasn’t like fucked up by it or hurt by it. Like I was just like, oh like


But one day those boys are gonna get to a place where they’re looking for connection

And then they’re gonna have to go and try to find people to be friends with

They’re gonna have to go try to put their selves out there and then they’re gonna be faced with exactly what they fucking did to

Me because that is how the universe works. You learn through fucking contrast. So the way that people treat you

They’re gonna line up with the same shit. So just know that and just fucking keep your little ass moving. Don’t get upset

Don’t get insecure. Don’t freak out if someone doesn’t want to be friends with you

Don’t freak out if someone is like rude to you or whatever or just like doesn’t acknowledge you like fuck you

Then like fuck you and just keep walking. You know, I mean, it’s literally a numbers game

It’s a fucking numbers game of how many people you can talk to I swear to God

Like if you just commit to talking to five new people a day like smiling and just like looking at someone in their eyes

You don’t have to talk to them or you could just say hi if you just commit to

Every day saying hi and smiling at five different people every day

It’s only a matter of time

Before one of those smiles leads to something so much more if you want to make it ten people a fucking day

Then make it ten people. But if you’re just playing the numbers game

It’s eventually gonna flip like something’s gonna change but not acknowledging people not talking to people not doing anything

It’s gonna keep getting you what you’ve been getting. So if you just say I’m gonna smile at fucking five people every day

Just see what happens and trust me

You’ll be more shocked than you think but I guarantee you someone out of this group of people is

Going to like that about you that you just smiled at them and probably will say something and speak to you and you never know

Where it’s gonna go. You never know where that initial

Acknowledgement of someone is going to lead

So just keep taking the fucking chance and literally every day just smile at five new people

I swear to God just fucking do it and see what happens because if you keep track for like a month

That’s a hundred fifty fuck of people you just engaged with in one month and I guarantee you

More than you expect will talk to you and you might end up with a couple of friends at the end of the month

You never fucking know. So just give it the goddamn chance, but I promise you it’s a numbers game

So increase your odds increase your chances and you’re fucking good. Like it’s gonna happen. It’s a fucking numbers game

It’s like if you go to the casino and you just keep playing you’re gonna hit eventually

You just gotta keep hitting the button

so keep smiling keep acknowledging people and just fucking take the chances that you can and

Do it and eventually one of them is gonna hit and I promise you it fucking will

Okay, my last thing this is what I’m gonna leave y’all off on because this podcast long as fuck

Go to a local therapist or counselor or whoever like just start talking to them about your little friend issue and

See if they have any ideas for what the fuck you could do places

You can go events you could attend just see cuz they’re local don’t know what’s going on in the area

That’s something my counselor helped me with like she thought of some new ideas of shit back in the day

That helped me and it like it’s just a new perspective. It’s new ideas

That’s new thoughts and it’s someone that’s local

so they know what the fuck is going on and they probably can give you some more insight than I could because it’s gonna be

Specific to your area. So go see a fucking counselor or a therapist or whatever it is

even if it’s just once go in there and talk to them about wanting to make friends and ask them their ideas of what you

Could do how to do it and then just see where the fuck it leads

But you got this. I promise I hope you take something away from this episode

And I hope you feel a little bit more like ready and prepared to go meet some fucking friends, bitch

Cuz you got this like it’s literally a numbers game

I promise you got this so much and if you’re listening to me you got

Personality and even if you don’t just fucking copy some shit that I said and make people laugh

If you like this podcast, I just have one request and it’s that you go leave me a five-star rating

Thank you so much

If you want to keep up with me all of my social media will be linked in the description of this podcast

Also, if you are interested in one-on-one coaching with me I have now created an application process

So it’s no longer just free to schedule. I’m doing applications now to keep up with the demand because it just got too high

So now I’m screening people

Basically to see who’s a good fit and who’s not because I want to work with action takers

I want to work with people that are serious about transforming their life because the shit that I say y’all know

That’s what it’s for and where I specialize is with the people that have been looking for answers

They can’t find and the people that have been trying shit, and it’s just not working

I’m the person that those people can go to

So if you’re interested in that I will put the link to the application in the description box also

And I want to make it very clear that

You’ve already got what it takes to get through what you’re dealing with or to improve your life or to reach your goals

And I’ll help you see that and it’s gonna be a lot easier when you got me in your corner because that’s exactly how

I want it to feel I want it to feel like you have someone that has your back and like I’m in your corner because

That’s what it is. Like I’m there for you, and I’m there to do shit with you

But anyways, thank you so much for listening. Please stay safe and take care of yourself, and I will talk to you next Sunday