Aware & Aggravated - 38. Influencers & Misplaced Confidence

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Hi friends! So this week I want to talk some shit about social media. I’m gonna

share some realizations and then I’m gonna rant for a minute because I have

some shit going on that’s just pissing me off that I keep seeing on social media.

And one of the realizations I’m gonna share about posting online and like

being online is one of the things that actually helped me move away and change

my life. First off, let’s just jump into the shit. Social media gives people a

false sense of importance. And I’m not talking about people with followers, I’m

talking about people without followers too. Like I have some followers it’s like,

oh cute, fun. But it gives day-to-day normal people a false sense of

importance also because you’re posting shit and you feel like people are

keeping up with you. It’s like you feel like people are watching you. You feel

like people actually give a fuck about you. So you’re like posting your outfit,

you’re posting your dinner, you’re posting your this, posting your that. It’s

like people feel the impulse to post everything they’re doing because they

think people care. Like that’s kind of like the vibe it gives you. Like it makes

you feel like someone’s watching you. Like people give a fuck about you and

they want to know what you’re up to. And this makes you feel better about your

life. It makes you feel good about your life. Even if it’s a life that you don’t

like, you’re getting positively reinforced that like people care about

what you’re doing. So it makes you weirdly like in your mind feel better

about the life that you’re living. And it makes you want to keep posting. Like yes,

some people do look at your page because they want to keep up with you. But a lot

of people don’t. Like the reality is most people get on social media for a

distraction. They just want to like get online and just go play. So like anytime

there’s a void in someone’s day, like you’re waiting at the post office, you’re

fucking driving and the lights red, you just get on your phone real quick and

you just like start scrolling to distract yourself. Or like you’re doing

cardio. Or you get in bed and you’re just like bored and you’re laying there so

you just start scrolling social media. People just scroll social media. They’re

not getting on to look at you. You’re just what pops up when they get online.

Like I’ve had to humble the fuck out of myself. Like people don’t actually give a

fuck what I’m doing. Some people do and I get that. But majority of people, I’m just

what comes up like when they’re on social media. Like they’re looking for a

distraction and I just happen to be there. You know like people are not like

watching my shit and eating it up the way that I think they are. Because like I’ve

noticed I’ve been so like stressed about what I post because I feel like

people give a fuck. They don’t. They fucking don’t. No one is watching my shit

and analyzing it as hard as I am. Like I’m analyzing it and I see every piece

of content that I post and I’m very like perfectionist about it. But I realize

like not everybody sees everything you post and not everybody gives a fuck. Like

genuinely. But the way that this realization helped me change my life and

it’s the reason that I fully moved away is feeling good about yourself on social

media because you posted shit and you shared your dinner. Like let’s just say

you shared a story of your dinner and 300 people watched it or a thousand

people watched it. Whatever it is. It’s like people are watching me. Like it

gives you this sense of like oh my god like people care what I’m up to. They

care what I’m doing. And like you get in this false reality of like thinking

people give a fuck. And I’m not trying to be a negative Nancy and like a Debbie

Downer and be like nobody gives a fuck about you. But social media heightens it

when it shouldn’t. Like a lot of people are not actually doing shit with their

life. Like they’re posting their fucking lemon water in the morning and they

think they have a sense of accomplishment because people are

watching their story. Babe they were swiping because they wanted distraction

and your little lemon water just popped up. Like I’m so sorry to say it but

literally like social media will get you in the mindset that you’re important and

that people care about you. And it’s a weird thing because that distracts you

from the reality of your actual life. And this will give you a false sense of

connection. I think that’s the better way to say it. It’s not that you aren’t

important but you’re going to feel a lot more connected to people than you

actually are. And you’re going to feel like a lot more people are concerned

about you. And this will become addicting and you will get addicted as fuck to

posting online because that’s your sense of connection. That’s your sense of

feeling good. So that’s how I actually got to the point where I was ready to

move. Like I was looking at my social media presence online. I’m like okay I

have followers. Cute. Fun. But what is my actual life? Like when I stopped letting

social media distract me from what my life actually was and how I actually

felt about my life. I was sat square in the reality of it and it wasn’t a

fucking comfortable reality. Like it was like oh shit this is my life. Like take

away the distraction of social media. Take away feeling like people give a

fuck about you. Take away all that. Like turn your phone off and then look at

your life. What the fuck? Literally that’s what came out of my mouth when I

did that. I was like what the literal fuck is my life? Like if I turn my phone

off all my followers disappear. All my content disappears. Like if I just look

at the square reality of what my life is. I was like damn like I’m not actually

doing as good as I thought I was. And that’s the fucking problem. Social media

makes everybody think that they’re doing a lot better than they actually are.

Because it makes you feel like people are watching you and keeping up with you

when they’re fucking not. It’s just the appearance of that. But these social

media platforms have been engineered and set up in a way to make you addicted to

them as a consumer. Like as you’re watching other people and you also get

addicted to posting. Like your whole sense of self is like tied up in it

sometimes. And your sense of feeling good and feeling like important is tied up in

that. That’s a basic need of a human being is to feel important. And these

apps have literally like capitalized on that to make us addicted to them. Because

like everyone posts their story and no one posts with intention anymore. No one

actually like takes time to post like meaningful shit or like anything that

matters to them. It’s like oh they’re just posting their daily routine and

their fucking coffee they had and their random shit. It’s like girl who literally

gives a fuck? Like you know what I mean? Like it’s cute and it’s nice to watch. I

like when people post certain things. I’m not for the fucking lemon water and the

coffee. We get it bitch. But everybody posts it. Like everybody is posting

everything they do in a day. But I was doing the same thing until I broke out

of that. Like I was posting all my random little day-to-day shit thinking that

somebody gave a fuck. And then once I realized like yo what is your life

actually? Stop with the image you’re putting online. Stop with sharing shit

that doesn’t matter. Like take it take it away for a second and look at your

actual life and how you actually feel. And stop trying to feel better about it.

Like get square in the reality what the fuck your life is dude. That was just a

big thing for me because once I looked at my life it became so uncomfortable

and I was like ew like I’m changing it. And literally within a week I moved away

and changed my whole fucking life. Like that realization set me the fuck free.

But now I just look around on social media and I’m like what the fuck is

everybody doing? Like people put so much effort into their posts and I’m like

girl what the fuck? Like I understand it’s most people’s jobs but I’m talking

like normal people. Like people with like a thousand followers that are just

like normal and not trying to have a big presence online. Like what the fuck are

y’all stressing out so hard for? So Betty Bop in the fucking town you grew up in

can look at what you’re doing and it makes people feel a sense of importance

that’s not real. Like this I’m just trying to like break that down for

everybody because it fucked me up for so long. Like I was just living in this

reality of like social media is fun like oh it made me feel better about who I am

and what I’m actually doing. And as soon as I realized social media helped me

feel better about the life I was living I was like oh fuck. Like that’s where the

awareness kicked in and I was like why is it making me feel better? Why is

social media making me feel better about my life? Like that should not be

happening. Like escaping your reality and playing on a little platform should not

make you feel better okay? You should feel good in your normal day-to-day life

as it is. So that let me know that there was like a big disconnect of like I’m

not truly happy in my life. And realizing that made me understand I need to have a

life that I truly enjoy living and then share parts of it. It’s like the trend

now on social media to not live an exciting life. It’s just to make it look

like you’re living an exciting life. Like you’re supposed to have a life

everybody wants and be sharing parts of that. Not just orchestrating it to look

like you have a good life online. Am I making sense or am I just talking

fucking shit? Because I feel like nobody is like worth the shit anymore. Like

everybody just lives for social media. They don’t live and then share it on

social media. And that’s one of the main reasons so many influencers are burning

the fuck out. Like so many people are quitting. So many people are like oh my

god I had to take a mental health break. It’s because they’re orchestrating their

life to look pretty. They don’t actually have a pretty life. Like there’s only

exhaustion when there’s a disconnect between who you actually are and the

image you’re portraying. That’s exhausting to keep up. But if you

actually had a life you liked, you’d just be sharing parts of it casually. I don’t

know where the fuck my voice is going but it’s trying to run away. And one more

part with that I’m gonna get into in a few minutes is trying to just casually

share your life is no longer cool anymore. Like if it’s not like high

production, high quality, people are like stressing the fuck out. So it’s like even

if you just want to share a casual part of your life, so much effort goes into

trying to make it look better and make it look pretty and make it look like

well-produced. Like that’s fucking exhausting and it’s annoying. Like even

if you do have a happy and exciting life, it’s not gonna look that exciting because

everybody else’s image they’re putting on is so fucking fake and it’s so over

the top that where you actually have a life that you’re happy, it doesn’t look

like you’re that happy because these other people are like blowing smoke up

your fucking ass with what they’re posting. It’s just the comparison thing

of like I could be sharing my actual life and how I’m doing good but if I’m

not doing ten times more than what I’m currently doing like Joe Schmoe here on

the side with his fucking Lamborghini, like my life doesn’t look that great. And

I’ve actually fallen into this trap before too. Like you’re trying to create

content, you’re trying to make shit so important but what you need to be trying

to do is make your life worthy of content. Like so it’s easy to just pull

out a fucking camera, record a tidbit of what you’re actually doing, and then

share it. But it’s so backwards now, like it’s so inauthentic. It’s so like I’m

thinking of ideas to make it look like my life is pretty. How do I keep thinking

of more ideas? But people don’t realize motherfucker, make your life better and

it will be easier to film it. And I haven’t figured this out fully, like I’m

still working on it too. But that’s just one of the things I’ve realized recently

and I’m working on implementing that because I’m living a life that like I’m

so busy and doing so much shit but I actually enjoy it. And now I’m at the

point where I’m not recording so much because I’m actually like enjoying my

life and getting shit done. Like it’s the weirdest thing, it’s like I know I’m

saying make a good life so you can share that, but I’d be having fun now. Like I

don’t ever pull out my fucking phone, I’m not that type. Like I always forget to

pull out my phone. I’d be forgetting I’m an influencer. Like I don’t even like to

fucking say that. But like I do have an obligation kind of now to post online

and I let it stress me out for so long and I’m just like no, like if I’m not

doing shit I’m not posting. Or like if I’m just busy working like I’m not

posting, I’m fucking getting my business done. I hope these thoughts are making

sense because it makes sense in my fucking brain. And it’s been the weirdest

thing to watch once I became aware of all this and stopped really like doing

it. Like I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing with my social media, like I want

to change it. I want to fucking delete it all but I can’t because it’s like

everything I do now, like everything I do now is dependent on it. Like I can’t

just fucking shut my shit off. So I’m kind of stuck with it but I really want

to change what I post and how I post. But I’m like what the fuck am I doing even?

You know like I want to post with more intention and get out of the mindset of

like people give a fuck what I’m doing. Like they don’t. They genuinely don’t. So

my social media got very draining. Like posting on social media got draining as

fuck. But now I’m just kind of like being a lot more casual. I’m stopped trying to

be so like perfect and I’m just like fucking around now. Like I’m at the point

I’m literally just like fucking around. Like I just do what I want to post and I

make sure I have fun with it. Because if you don’t have fun with it, it’ll turn

into a task. So now I just post what I want. Like I don’t give a fuck anymore.

I’m just like whatever I’m over it. Like I’ll post little things. I post my little

get ready with me on TikTok and like it did good and I’m just like this is funny

as shit. Like I literally don’t care about social media anymore. Like it’s

annoying. And now I’m gonna start ranting. Okay I got the deep shit out of the way

but now I just want to run my mouth. Like literally everybody now is somebody on

social media. Like everybody is a somebody and I fucking hate it. There’s

so much to unpack with this but typically like people didn’t have like

super good quality content unless they were big or unless they were somebody.

And what I mean by somebody is like you have a lot of followers. Like you’re

somebody big. Like you were given the opportunity to have like super well

produced content because you made it. And now everybody has a nice camera and

everybody has like super good quality shit. Like girl what the fuck is going on?

Like I can’t tell who is a somebody and who’s actually important and who’s not.

Because like Joe Schmoes that go to my gym have like 2,000 followers and they

have like next level like drop 5k on a fucking camera and they have the top of

the top quality for their pictures. And I’m like who is this? It’s too accessible

now. It’s like everybody looks like a somebody because having like really

really well orchestrated content and like pictures and like high quality shit

is so accessible to everyone now. You can’t tell who actually is a somebody

and it’s the biggest mindfuck. Because I’m like oh they must be big. No girl

they got like 2k. I’m like what the fuck are you doing? I have so many followers

and I’m like I don’t even give a shit. Like I literally just like I want to

have the good quality content but like I don’t care. So I’m like how do y’all

care? Can y’all tell me the trick? Because I don’t give a fuck. But the other thing

with that like everything is so mass-produced and I’m fucking sick of it.

Like everything is mass-produced. Like what the fuck? No one is just like making

random ass videos anymore and like everyone is so effort. Like everybody’s

putting so much effort into what they’re posting. I’m like girl let’s just fucking

make it easy. I don’t like to post things that are like difficult to create. Like I

just want easy little things to like throw together and post. I don’t want to

put the effort into it. But like that’s how social media used to be. No one put

effort and it was just random little tidbits of your life. Now everybody is so

fucking orchestrated and perfecting the image that they have on social media. So

now it’s like uncommon to have normal quality content. Like if you don’t have

mass-produced shit you’re looked at like a fucking idiot and like you don’t know

what you’re doing. Like it’s weird. Like it’s so weird. It’s intimidating and I’m

sick of it. Like I don’t like to have to put effort into pictures and shit and

videos. Like literally girl turn your fucking phone off and everything that

you just worked on all day is gone. Like we work so hard and put so much effort

into posting shit online when online doesn’t exist. It’s not a tangible thing.

It’s like a little glass box as our phone. We waste all this time of our

actual life, living our actual being and like being a human. We spend the time

that we have to experience life making fucking content that doesn’t exist

really. Like you literally shut your phone off, you turn off Wi-Fi and

everything you did was for nothing. Like there’s no… Does that make sense? Like I

it’s weird wrapping my mind around like I don’t want to put effort into making

my life look good anymore and like making it look pretty online. I want to

put my effort into having a good life and that’s what I’ve been doing. And but

my social media is like slacking because of it. Cuz like even if I post my

life as it is now it’s fucking great. It’s way better than it’s ever been but

it won’t appear that great because there’s so many other people posting

online that their lives are a hundred times better than they actually are. So

like me living a normal good life is not shit compared to what’s out there. And

it’s like I don’t even care to fucking put the effort into it. Like girl I’m

gonna just do my goddamn thing. Like I said I’m just ranting at this point but

social media has really been pissing me off. Like it’s so weird now and the

biggest thing is like everybody’s a somebody and I can’t get off that. Like I

don’t know why it aggravates the shit out of me. People really are a fucking

nobody but they have their really good camera quality and they’re really like

mass-produced content but like what they’re sharing is actually shit. But one

thing I do think is really fucking funny is when people get pissy when they

aren’t gaining followers. Like everybody thinks the trick is to have perfect

quality content and you’ll grow. But people are spending all this money on

like editors and all these expensive ass cameras. Their quality is fucking

immaculate. It’s 10 out of 10 but they still aren’t growing. Everyone’s trying

to figure out the cheat code and they think that’s it. Like sure high quality

content will help you grow a little bit but now it doesn’t matter if you have

quality content because everybody fucking does. Like it’s not the flex

anymore. Like everybody’s like oh I’ll just go be hot and it’s enough. Everyone’s

bored of that. Everyone’s fucking bored of the perfect content and everybody

being so goddamn fake. Like now in order for you to grow on social media you have

to actually be special and be someone worth the fuck. You can’t just look like

you’re someone worth the fuck because everyone sees through it. Does that make

sense? Like everybody looks like they are somebody so everyone’s becoming

unimpressed by that. Like you actually have to be someone and share good

quality stuff or like actually be funny. Actually have a personality. Actually

share valuable information to get followers and people don’t like that.

People don’t fucking like it and it’s so funny to watch everybody get pissy. I

have one more point I’m gonna make and then I’m gonna talk shit about the gym I

go to Alphaland and all the influencers I’ve been seeing in real life. Y’all I’m

about to burst a little bubbles I’m sorry. But the thing about social media

that’s really been pissing me off is ads are everywhere. Like literally Instagram

the new algorithm is so beyond fucked. I don’t see anyone I actually fucking

follow. I’m sick of it. It’s ugly. Only thing getting posted is reels. Girl I

don’t always want to watch a fucking video. I want to look at pictures too.

Like I understand TikTok was doing good and it’s all videos like Instagram

trying to copy it. What the fuck ever. But ads literally every other fucking video

is a goddamn ad and it pisses me off. Like I’m actually like so aggravated by

it. Like I understand these apps need to make their money. Like Instagram it says

that you need to make your money. I get it. But can you space your fucking ads

out a little bitch or can you give me a fucking thing where I can pay $10 a

month I don’t have to see a goddamn fucking ad because I’m sick of them. Like

YouTube Red or premium whatever it is it’s like 10 bucks a month. I have that

so I don’t have to watch anybody’s stupid fucking ads. Like I hate

advertisements. I fucking hate them and that’s all social media is now. Like even

on Instagram stories like you click two fucking stories and then boom there’s an

ad. Here’s a couch you could buy. Here’s a fucking sweater. Like I’m sick of it.

Like everything is ads and even if it’s not ads like everyone that is creating

content now is creating shit and using their social media to sell something.

Like everything is marketed and I’m like what the fuck dude. Like social media is

no longer fun. Like social media is annoying as shit. It’s so fucking fake

and if it’s not fake as fuck there’s ads everywhere and if it’s not an actual ad

like they paid for the ad it’s someone marketing something. Like it’s actually

the most annoying shit. Like no one just posts on social media to post anymore.

It’s all calculated and it’s all like ew I don’t know how to explain it. Like

everyone’s posting to sell something or posting to feel better about their self

and what they’re actually doing with their little shitty booty life and it’s

like everything is so see-through and when I say awareness is a curse it

fucking is because I can’t enjoy social media anymore. I’m too aware of what’s

going on. Like I can’t enjoy shit. Like reality TV I used to love. I used to eat

it up. I don’t fucking care no more. Like I see through it. I understand so

many elements. I know how to break down everything. It’s like my brain is not

stimulated anymore and it’s scary because all of my life is like on social

media. Girl this really just turned into a fucking rant huh? I literally just get

on social media now to post my shit and get off. Like I watch my own things and I

watch a couple of my friends things but I don’t sit and like consume social

media anymore. You can’t. Like you literally will consume ads. That’s all

you’re gonna fucking consume. Girl I don’t know where I’m going with this. I’m

just kind of going but I do want to talk shit on influencers at the fucking gym

that I go to. Yo you guys have no idea what people look like in real life. Like

there’s so much more that goes into these influencers than you realize. They

are all like two feet tall. I swear to God they’re the smallest little fucking

rugrats I’ve ever seen running around the gym. Like on social media they look

huge. They look massive and then you see them in real life and they’re like the

size of a pack of fucking gum. Like I don’t get it. I literally don’t get it.

And it’s so weird to see someone with so many followers online and they’re so

respected for the person that they are online and then the person they are in

real life is a fucking wacko. Like they’re lame. Like they’re literally lame

as shit. They’re insecure as fuck. You can tell by the way that they walk. Like

that’s one thing. It’s like you see all these influencers but you don’t see the

way that they walk and the way that they carry their self. Like they’re

highly respected in the little world they’ve created online but in real life

they know they’re a fucking dipshit. They know that they’re not shit. Like they

literally just walk around so insecure and like scared and timid and I’m like

what the hell. And then you have the other ones that are like overinflated

sense of fucking ego in public or at the gym or like at clubs and shit. Like

they’re overinflated their sense of self but really like I see you. You’re a

fucking loser. Like you can just tell by the way that they behave y’all. When I

said being aware is a curse it’s also fun because I get to see through people.

Like I know who has followers and who doesn’t by the way that they fucking act

sometimes. You can just spot it. Like I’m very good at that. But there is this one

guy on TikTok that screams like motivational shit. Like he’ll scream at

people get the fuck up and get to the gym and all this and that. And then I saw

him at the gym and I was like girl you be yelling like that? Like sure he’s in

decent shape but like seeing who he was in real life and the way that he walked

and the way he carried himself I was like you’re a laughingstock. You online

are on there screaming at people? Like girl you? I don’t I’m so baffled by it.

Like I’m so baffled. The main reason I’m bringing this up is because I want to

put everybody’s mind at ease and to help everybody be less insecure because the

people you’re judging your life against online like you see these people that

are all cool and they’re all great they’re all this they’re all that and

then you look at your life and you just subconsciously compare it’s not really

them. Like they aren’t like that in real life and I want to set everybody free

from that mentally. Like the people that you idolize online are not this fucking

cool. Like they’re not shit in real life and I hate to sound like I’m just

dogging the fuck out of everybody but I’m very protective of my followers

because I care about all of you and I know how hard it is to be comparing

yourself to people online and how much it will fuck with you and your sense of

value and your sense of self so I just want to protect you all from that and

that’s why I’m revealing this shit. Like these people are not as cool as you

think. They’re not anything to be intimidated by. They’re nothing special.

Like there are some people that are really cool that have really great

content that are like cool ass people in real life but most of them are not this

special and that’s the thing is like when you get online everybody looks

special. You think everybody is special and there’s no way that this many people

are special is all I’m gonna tell you and reassure you of. So you can tell the

ones that are actually special. So many more are just an image online and I

don’t want you all comparing yourself to the shit that you see because it’s not

real. Like this is just what I’m trying to expose in this episode is the reality

of it so that y’all don’t feel so bad about yourself because I don’t want

anything to hurt you guys. I’m exposing it. Like I’m ranting a little and I’m

being a little rough I know but I’m not talking shit. I’m just trying to protect

you all and share some of the things that I wish somebody else would have

shared. Like someone else that was around influencers. I wish someone else would

have posted this a couple years ago before I got into all this because I

felt so bad about myself and like my life and what was online. Like I was so

intimidated by everything online. I was like my life is not shit but I just want

to reassure you guys the norm and like what looks normal online none of these

people are actually experiencing it okay like it’s a very small scale of people

who are actually special who are actually balling like you think and who

are actually living a life that you think that you want. Most of this shit is

so fake so I just want to protect you all mentally and that’s what I’m trying

to accomplish but y’all know I just like to complain and talk shit but that’s my

motive and I just want to make that very clear and girl the fucking tea that

I have about that goddamn gym these influencers none of them like each other

they literally all- I’m gonna get fucking shit on I might get into trouble for

this but none of these fucking influencers are friends none of them

fucking like each other okay they literally get together film content and

fuck off like they literally like some of them don’t like each other at all but

like they’re not friends like it seems like none of these influencers are actually

like bestie boos and especially the fucking drama with the photographers if

you see an influencer with a photographer and then you see the

photographer all of a sudden stop working with them there’s a motherfucking

problem there I’m just gonna let you know I know so much tea and I’m not the

one to ever like rat out people’s business like I like to be someone that

people can talk to because I like to know everything going on I like to know

the tea so I’ll never fully spill it like I’ll never come on here like talking

and like exposing people’s fucking shit but I will say photographers and

influencers if they all of a sudden have a breakup one of them switch the fuck up

okay I’m just gonna let you know some people get too big for their fucking

britches whether it’s the photographer or the influencer but there’s so much

snake shit that goes on and there’s so many weird-ass dynamics but like I said

these people are not friends like the people you see online like oh my god

I’ve seen so many of these collabs be so staged and so fucking fake like I posted

a video of my friend Leslie me and her are actually friends as fuck like she’s

like one of my best friends here I see her at the gym every day I’ve hung out

with her like a month before I ever posted anything online of us like we

were at her pool getting fucking drunk we finished a bottle of tequila together

we talked about all our deepest darkest secrets like she’s a genuine ass bitch

and like before I ever got online with her like we were really good friends and

we developed a really good friendship these people you see online are literally

like they don’t know a fuck thing about each other they meet up for the videos

so they can get clout from each other they make a video and dip and a lot of

them like don’t like each other but they want to get the other person’s followers

and be seen with them so they can grow like it’s so fucking fake and it’s such

bullshit it’s honestly kind of funny like seeing it like I’m I say it’s funny

because I’m so shocked I’m like what the hell like literally moving to Houston

was the my favorite thing I ever did cuz I’m getting like all the tea like I’m

living in it like I’m living in the fucking Mecca of like all this drama and

it is so funny and y’all these people all be fucking each other no fuck that

it’s funny like I think it’s so fucking funny they all be fucking each other for

clout like they fuck each other for clout they fuck each other for videos

and a lot of them just fuck each other like it’s so messy like I just like to

sit back and observe like I just like to watch and know everything going on

and all of them on drugs all of them on fucking drugs I’m telling you steroids

or molly coke ecstasy like party drugs they’re on party drugs or they’re on

fucking steroids most of them are on both but all these people y’all posting

about all this nutrition all this health and wellness all this this is how you

live your lifestyle here’s my lemon water here’s my fat burners they are the

most drug using motherfuckers I’ve ever seen in my life like it’s insane but one

thing that’s so funny to me about molly and ecstasy like that’s a girl drug oh

my god I’m so sorry in my opinion like that’s a fucking girl drug like to roll

like it’s such a bitch thing to do like that’s for the girls in the gays

straight guys that roll well I don’t know why that’s so unattractive to me

but like that’s so pussy fitness people especially they love some molly bitch

they love some fucking ecstasy I just want to say these influences party a lot

and they party hard bitch like you think that they’re not gonna spend the money

that they have like they’re buying fish scale they’re not buying like normal

shit but like they are partying hard as fuck and like a lot of them posts like

oh I went to the club last night but I only had water girl no the fuck you

didn’t you have some ecstasy I don’t know why this is so funny to me this is

just hilarious to me I have a time of this like I just love knowing everything

but the image y’all are seeing online is not these people like it’s not fucking

them at all like everybody posts what they think they need to post everyone is

trying to orchestrate a certain image for like hidden motives and I’m just

like I’m sick of it I can everybody just go back to being like normal and just

like spamming their fucking feed and shit like stop trying to look perfect I

do want to say that anyone you see me posting in a picture with like on my

profiles they’re a genuine ass person and I’ve tested them y’all know I test

everybody but the people that I post with are people that I’ve been friends

with I don’t just take a picture with someone and post them like if I say that

they’re in my life they’re actually in my life I don’t do the whole clout shit

like I post on my Instagram is like my actual friends that’s like the people I

actually have in my life so if you ever see me with someone they’re a good one

if you see me not with someone I don’t know them yet or I’m avoiding them and

one more thing I want to talk about is everybody coming out with a goddamn

brand like everybody’s coming out with their own brand and I’m like cool I get

it like I respect the hustle but y’all are all ordering from the same fucking

manufacturers on Alibaba and fucking getting all this same quality shit and

I’m gonna say it’s shit because that’s what it is like everybody’s ordering the

same poor quality materials and products slapping their name on it and then

trying to sell it like how many more people can come out with brands like this

shit is so done it’s so like washed out like everybody’s fucking done it

everybody’s got a brand everybody’s doing the same thing everybody’s selling

the same products with different fucking labels and it’s annoying like look

there’s nothing to buy no more there’s no business to make anymore that’s a

product based business and there’s no fucking like shit to buy no more it’s

all the fucking same and like all the retailers and everybody like all the

quality of everything is going down this is a separate rant but the one about the

businesses girl these businesses are not making as much money as you think like

people with their little clothing brands the little sunglasses brands or the

little whatever fucking accessories they’ve got like their little brands

they’re not making as much as you think I’m gonna just leave it there cuz I

don’t want something a negative Nelly cuz all I’ve done is like talk shit this

whole time but my whole point I want to reiterate it is I’m not bringing people

down I’m bringing you guys into the awareness of the truth of it because it

will make you feel bad about your life like seeing all this shit going so right

for everybody on social media and all these people able to live these certain

ways I just want to promise you they’re fucking not alright don’t compare your

life to it don’t get stressed out don’t wonder why are you different you’re not

different everybody’s dealing with the same shit people are just choosing what

they post and choosing what they don’t post and I do post this a lot of a time

I always post you’re doing better than you think you are and I want to remind

you of that and I just wanted to share a little bit of the truth of what’s

actually going on in the world and not just like the perfect part that people

show you like this life is not as pretty as people make it seem like the life of

being an influencer like I am one at this point like I’m not that big but I

am at the point where like I’m considered an influencer I don’t

fucking like that term at all but I have to like accept the reality of it but I

just want you all to know the people that are sitting there looking up at

everybody that has more followers than them the life that you see is not as

fucking pretty as they think like my life is great but I’m not focused on

like trying to make my life look perfect like I’ll post on my story when I’m

having a bad fucking day like I’m crying I’m upset like I just binge ate like I’ll

post like my shit and my struggles but a lot of people don’t so just don’t

compare yourself to the people online don’t think that these people that have

followers have perfect lives they’re literally a fucking train wreck like

most of them like social media is so much more of like a mental chess game

than you realize and it fucks people up so much cuz like I said these apps and

these platforms are created to make you addicted to them like people are

addicted to these apps as creators too like people are addicted to watching it

but they’re addicted to posting I’ve fallen into that trap like it’s so nice

when all these people are watching you and you have all these views and all

these likes it’s like oh my god it’s invigorating but it’s so fucking

damaging because like I said it gives you a false sense of importance like

it’s not that you’re not important but it makes you feel like you are a lot

more important than you realize and then when your actual life doesn’t match

that it’s a mind fuck cuz like online you are somebody you’re big you’re this

you’re that but in real life your life sucks and you fucking hate it there’s a

lot to unpack with that but yeah I just wanted to talk my shit a little bit but

with all that being said about how much I hate social media I do like it and if

you do want to follow me and check my shit out my Instagram and tick tocks and

everything will be linked in the description of this podcast if you like

this podcast leave it a 5 star rating whether you’re on Spotify or Apple

podcast tell me you love 5 stars and if you want to hear me talk about any other

topics just send me a DM on Instagram I’m always like adding to my list of

shit I want to talk about but that’s all I got for this episode thank you so much

for listening and I will talk to you next Sunday