Aware & Aggravated - 47. Wanting To Change Yourself & How To Actually Do It

🎁Amazon Prime 📖Kindle Unlimited 🎧Audible Plus 🎵Amazon Music Unlimited 🌿iHerb 💰Binance

I just hit that so pussy. I’m not gonna show my zazae.

Hi friends, so I’m real stressed right now. I don’t know fucking know why, but I’m like

real anxious. I’m giving anxiety, but I want to talk about wanting to change yourself in

this week’s episode because there’s such a stigma around wanting to change yourself and

like the self-development community and everybody’s like you need to accept yourself and love

yourself the way that you are. No, bitch. I don’t want to fucking accept myself how

I am. So I want to break some shit down and then give you my advice on how to actually

change yourself. And then a lot of people have trouble with trusting their own judgment

if they should change something or not. Like, oh, am I going to regret it? Am I not? So

I’m going to tell you all the ways that I go about knowing if I actually need to change

something or if I’m like bugging. So all my cheat codes are coming. Just keep listening

to this episode. But I do want to start off with that fucking stigma and I’m going to

shove a stick up its ass because I’m sick of everybody saying that shit of like you

have to accept yourself. Like stop trying to change yourself. Girl, human beings are

meant to change. We’re meant to evolve. We’re meant to constantly be changing. Like I said

in my hookups episode, human beings like progression. We’re never going to feel comfortable staying

the same. It goes back to like the whole desires thing. As soon as you have a new desire, you’re

going to have to start changing shit. It’s like once you reach a certain goal, a new

one is always going to arise. So you meet a desire, you’re always going to have another

one. It’s a never ending cycle. You can’t get rid of it. To even want to not have desires

is a desire, babe. So you’re stuck with that. And the whole self love journey shit, you’re

allowed to want to change yourself. I give you permission. You’re fully allowed to want

to change shit. That’s totally fine. It’s not self hating for you to want to change.

Not at all. So I’ve said this before. I’m someone that changes nonstop. Like I feel

like a whole brand new person every three months. Every three months it’s a new Leo.

Every fucking three months. It’s exhausting. It’s draining. I get sick and tired of it.

All I want is to just like have some stability and be consistent. But like I said in the

beginning of this, that’s not how human beings work. It’s not how we are. So as bad as I

want to just like be the same, I can’t. When you have like a heightened level of awareness,

good luck bitch. You’re not going to be able to stay the same. But with going on a self

development journey and starting to grow, you’re going to make a lot of mindset shifts.

And that’s one of the biggest things that my podcast provides to people is new perspectives,

new lenses for life and really big mindset shifts. So the biggest thing that I’ve noticed

is like whenever I make an internal mindset shift, like I drop a limiting belief or I

want to start something new or I just see things completely different. When you make

a mindset shift, you’re going to feel like you’ve leveled up inside internally. And when

you’re operating from a whole new mindset, being in the same body, doing the same shit,

having the same external is going to start to get like uncomfortable and feel weird.

Like your, your life’s going to feel like a gaslight because internally you’re so much

different, but your external is the fucking same. And that’s where I’m saying you have

to make changes. It’s totally fine to do that because you’re not changing yourself.

You’re helping your external match your new internal. So that’s my biggest thing is like

with a new mindset shift, changes are going to come that are physical. And if you don’t

make changes, it will drive you fucking insane. Just try it. Just try it, bitch. Just try

and have all the mindset shifts that you can make, level yourself up mentally so much,

and then see how comfortable you feel staying the same way that you are. You’re not, it’s

going to feel like a contradiction. It’s going to feel like something’s just off. So

the way that I like to look at making changes in my external, whether it’s my body or my

environment is making it a match to my new mindset and who I am inside. I like these

things to match or else I feel very uncomfortable, very fucking weird. I don’t have my pinky

ring on. Hang on. Let me get it. Oh my God. I knew I felt naked. Okay. We’re back. So

getting back on track, the more you shift internally, the more of a disconnect you’re

going to feel from your external. So wanting to change shit is normal, babe. It’s not self

hate. It’s not mean. It’s not fucked up. It’s not weird. You’re going to naturally just

want to change shit as you level up inside. And that’s something I carried a lot of guilt

for for so long. Cause like everybody preaches the same fucking shit. Like when I was going

through it and I was trying to like learn from people online, everybody’s on about,

you have to accept yourself. You’re perfect the way that you are. No bitch. Cause when

I was fat, I felt fat. I felt ugly. I felt not cute. And I felt ugly for more reasons

than just being overweight. I just didn’t look good. So for someone to say you’re perfect

the way that you are, I could not accept those words because I did not feel it. Like I couldn’t

accept accepting myself. I couldn’t fucking do it because I didn’t like how I looked.

I didn’t like how I felt. I didn’t like any of that shit. So I wanted to change it. So

in order for me to feel like I could truly be happy with how I was and who I was, I needed

to change some shit because what I felt internally was not what reflected. I didn’t feel like

a fat piece of shit inside. I didn’t feel ugly inside. So I had to put my ass into it

and like make my external cute. But a big thing that also played into the way that I

look and like wanting to change my appearance was the way that I was eating and the way

that I was living by not exercising and like eating like shit. I had new awareness in my

mind about how I wanted to present and how I felt about the way I had been living. And

I made a really big mindset shift that allowed me to truly change the way that I looked because

I had changed the way that I looked before, but it was never consistent. So until I like

truly shifted myself mentally, it just stayed the same. But I had a lot of realizations,

a lot of awareness and a lot of things that went into me finally changing the way that

I look and looking the way that I look now, which I’m very proud of. But the whole thing

with acceptance, let me just hit it real quick. With trying to accept yourself when you don’t

like yourself, a lot of people try and push you have to love yourself where you are. No,

you can love yourself as you progress and as you level up and as you make your external

a match to your internal, you will start to naturally be able to accept yourself. As soon

as you start making changes, just just sit still in a place and in a body that you don’t

like and try to force yourself to appreciate it and love yourself. Good luck, bitch. I

tried it. It’s literally like trapping yourself in a cage of being like, be happy with being

in the cage. Motherfucker, I could just get out. So my thing with acceptance is you do

have to accept where you’re currently at. You do not have to accept yourself and like

just take that and be like, ah, it’s good enough. Don’t try to make where you’re at

good enough. My whole thing with acceptance is you have to accept where you are in order

to be able to move forward or make a change. But you can’t just like cover your eyes and

be like, no, I’m perfect. I’m great where I am. When internally you feel like you don’t

fucking like it. You have to face where you’re truly at and it’s going to reveal all of the

shit that you want to change. So that’s where my next step comes in is stop like comforting

yourself when you don’t like where you are. Stop doing it. Stop trying to force yourself

to love yourself where you are. Use your discomfort with where you are and what you look like

to put a fire under your fucking ass to change it. Because a lot of people talk about motivation

and they struggle with motivation, but the true fucking motivation, you’re not going

to need it because once you face the reality of where you are and you stop telling yourself,

I’m perfect how I am when you do not feel it, you’re naturally just going to get a boost

and like a desire to go change shit because you’re no longer comforting yourself with

being uncomfortable. You’re allowing yourself to be uncomfortable and using that to motivate

you. But like I said, as soon as you stop comforting yourself and like trying to convince

yourself you’re perfect how you are and you should love yourself the way you are, it’s

going to reveal all the things you aren’t happy with. So when I did this, I was not

happy with my body. I was not happy with what I was doing for a living. I was not happy

with my financial situation. I was not happy with where I lived, the city or the house

bitch. Like I had to shift everything. But the whole thing with comfort, like when you’re

comforting yourself, when you’re unhappy, as soon as you stop comforting yourself, it’s

going to be a lot harder to not make changes. So it’s going to feel bad to not change things

because you’re now extremely uncomfortable. So this is my whole little spiel about like

here’s a little motivation for you. But now let’s jump into trusting yourself to make

changes and trusting yourself to make the right decision about what you want to do and

what you want to shift because it’s very overwhelming. It’s very, very scary to be like, okay, I’m

uncomfortable and unhappy with all this shit. But what now? Like a lot of people are too

scared to make the changes. So I get why everybody’s stuck and the whole like comfort

yourself and like try to accept where you are. But I’m going to teach you the opposite

because trying to comfort yourself when you’re stuck where you are is going to limit you.

But the first thing you’re going to do is evaluate what you want to change. Like get

clear on all the things you want to change and then you’re going to look at why do you

want to change them? Like get very clear with your why because a lot of people get

stuck in trying to change shit so other people will approve of them and it’s like a subconscious

thing. So like you’re scared to change something cause you’re like, is it actually what I want

or am I doing it for other people or like people don’t know why they want certain things.

So that’s why I’m saying you have to look at the why when you find out what you want

to change. But I have a couple of things listed for the what for like what you want to change.

So I got physical appearance which also includes your style. So your body and your style. You

want to change that. Totally fine. Your hair. I’m going to talk about why I shaved my fucking

head in a minute and how I got the balls to do it. Second is like mannerisms. The way

you walk, the way you move, like shit like that. Your personality, the way you talk,

the way you interact with other people, the way you communicate. That’s something a lot

of people need to fucking change. Your intellect. Like how much you know cause you can always

learn more but you need to know what you want to learn more of. So that’s something you

can change is like your mental capacity and also like your intelligence. You can also

want to change your job or what you do and your environment. Like where you live, where

you spend your time, your house, you know. There’s a lot of things that you can want

to change. So like I just want to throw some examples of like the what because I’ve changed

everything about myself. I’ve changed the way that I walk, the way that I talk, the

way that I move. Like my hands, my mannerisms. I’ve put tattoos on myself. I’ve cut my hair.

I’ve changed my style. I’ve moved to a new city. I’ve moved to a different place. Like

I’ve moved to plenty of places but I have changed everything you can possibly change.

So I know how to be sure and how to figure out what to change and what not to change

and why I truly want to change it. So that’s what I’m going to try and teach you with these

next couple of steps. But if you want help sorting this out and you want help with this

one-on-one with me, you can schedule a call to work with me. I’ll add the link in the

description of this episode. It’s going to take you to the link on my website which

is where you can put in an application to work with me one-on-one and we’ll do Zoom

calls because I need to be able to see you. I like that. But my biggest thing with making

changes is you have to look at the why behind it. And I’m going to give you an example

of like why I want to change certain things and when my desire to change things kind of

comes about. So when I decided to start doing one-on-one coaching, I felt a desire to do

a new thing. But who I was at the time, I did not feel confident to do it as how I was.

So a lot of you guys have noticed that I used to wear a snapback in a lot of my videos like

a hat, like a backwards hat. But when I decided I wanted to position myself to work with people

one-on-one, I was like, I need to be taken more serious. I can’t be over here looking

like a fuck boy. So me wanting to be taken more serious is why I decided to stop wearing

my hat. Deciding to change that made me feel more confident to do what I decided to do.

Deciding to stop wearing the hat made me feel more confident with transitioning into working

with people one-on-one and becoming a coach. That’s something that made me feel better.

It made me feel boosted. It made me feel supported. It made me feel more confident. So that’s

just a small example of changing something about your physical appearance to better match

and line up with how you want to be portrayed. Because for me to get on here with my snapback,

it’s like, cool, it doesn’t change what’s coming out of my mouth, right? Like I share

good ass shit, but when you have my backwards hat on, it’s like in the wife beater and all

my jewelry and shit, bitch, I look like a fuck boy. I look like, what the fuck is he

about to teach me? He’s about to talk about getting bitches and shit. No, like it doesn’t

negate what’s coming out of my mouth because I share really good awareness and I know the

skills that I have and the way that I’m able to help people and like completely change

their fucking life. But I needed the package to match the message, if that makes sense.

So deciding to change my physical appearance to match that, also getting in way better

shape allowed me to feel more confident to step into working with people one-on-one.

So I didn’t look at it like I’m not wearing my hat because other people don’t want me

to. I know people would be fine with me wearing my hat. Y’all have been fine with it since

the fucking beginning. But in order for me to feel more confident, I did it for myself.

I did it for the way that I felt to feel more presentable and to feel better about

the package that I’m delivering my information from, if that makes sense.

So the couple of changes that I made with stepping into becoming a one-on-one coach,

all they were was to help me align with how I wanted to feel to do it. So that’s an example

of making changes in support of yourself. But now I want to jump into a couple of questions

that you can ask yourself for a sense of certainty if you want to make a change. Because a lot

of people would be like, no, Leo, you didn’t have to stop wearing your hat. That’s so fucking

stupid. Oh my God. A lot of people would be like, no, Leo, you don’t have to change yourself.

You don’t have to stop wearing your hat. We accept you. We support you. We love you. Everybody

would be supportive. They wouldn’t want me to change myself for what I wanted to do.

But I felt more confident by changing things. So I get that you guys would accept me. And

thank you. I appreciate that a lot. But in order for me to feel more confident doing

what I wanted to do, I made the changes that allowed me to feel that because looking like

a fuck boy on TikTok and looking like a fuck boy in my videos was like not cutting it.

Like I just felt a little bit insecure about trying to be taken seriously when I don’t

look like I take myself seriously, if that makes sense. Okay. So for the questions, my

first one is duh. Why do you want to change something? What’s the ultimate goal behind

making a certain change? What’s it going to accomplish? So if you want a new body, if

you want more money, if you want a new wardrobe, what are these things going to accomplish

for you? Like what’s the true motive and the true goal behind them? If it’s in line with

what you want, you know, it’s the right decision to make. Do you feel like the new change will

help you feel represented better? Do you feel like the change will represent what you

feel inside and what you want inside? Do you feel like it’s going to be an external representation?

Do you feel like it will be more accurate? That’s a good way to figure out if you should

change something or not. The next thing is, will it make you feel more comfortable? Like

will changing whatever it is that you want to change, make you feel more comfortable

with who you are and what you want to do. If you realize that you want to change something

so that you can be more accepted, that’s a tricky thing to navigate. It’s like the

acceptance thing. You want people to like you. It’s like that is where I’d say watch

it. But if you see that making a change will make you feel like a better version of yourself,

make it. That’s the change to fucking make. But you have to get very clear on your why.

Why you want to change certain shit girl? Like what, what is the real motive behind

why you want to change it? Is it going to make you feel more comfortable or not? Are

you doing it for acceptance or are you doing it to help you turn into the most ultimate

version of yourself that you want to become? Does it feel like the change you’re going

to make is more you or more of like a facade or a fake representation so people like you?

So the next question is kind of like the thing with my hat. Will making this certain change

make me feel more confident? Whether it’s in what I’m doing or how I am and who I am

and how I present. Just will it make me more confident? Yes or no? Because if it’s yes,

then that’s the decision to make. But also look at that with the why. Why will it make

you feel more confident? Is it the facade thing? Like I feel like people will like this

better so I’m more confident in the image that I’m putting up or am I going to be more

confident in the actual image of who I am? Okay, so my last question is what made me

shave my fucking head. All right. So is the change you want to make going to make things

more convenient for you? Because girl, I can’t tell you how much easier it is not to

shave my fucking head. But shaving my head, let me take you to the decision making process

that I went through, okay? Because I was literally standing in my fucking bathroom with the shaver

in my hand and I was like, should I? But I literally decided within like 20 minutes.

I had thought it through. I’m very strategic. I’m very calculated. I don’t make any rash

decision. But my ability to make decisions has sped up a lot. So when I had the first

thought I was like, should I shave my fucking head? I was looking at the pros and cons.

I had just moved to Houston and I was going to have to start looking for a new barber.

And I was like, I really don’t want to try and find a new barber because I’m very picky

with who touches my motherfucking head. All right. I’m very picky about haircuts because

if you fuck my hair up, you fuck me up. It will ruin you to have a bad haircut. So I

was like kind of having to look for a new barber and I was like shit. And then I was

like trying to save money when I first moved here. I was like tight on money. I was worried

I was concerned. I was like, that’s 50 bucks a week that I’d be saving if I just shave

my shit. So I also looked at, I’m doing one-on-one calls now. So I’m going to have to make a

break like during one day for like two hours to go get my fucking haircut. So I was like,

all right, it’s going to save me money to shave my own head. It’s going to save me time

two hours once a week. Cause I would get my haircut once a week. I’m very anal about it.

Like I shave my own shit once a week. And then I also looked at, it will make me look

more clean cut. Cause bitch, my hairline is fucking taken off running. So when I had my

long hair, I was so insecure about my hairline and like the way that it looked in TikToks.

And that’s a big reason why I wore hats all the time. It’s cause I don’t like to hear

people’s little fucking rat mouths. You think I don’t see my hairline, bitch. You think

I don’t fucking see it. You’re dumb. You’re a fucking bozo. It’s like telling me that

my skin is white. No shit girl. I fucking see it. My eyes are Brown. Duh. Like what

the fuck? Yeah. I don’t understand when people like point shit out. Like I don’t fucking

notice it already. Girl, I’m aware that my hairline’s fucked up, but what y’all aren’t

fucking aware of and y’all little rats run in your fucking mouth is I started losing

my hair at 21 because of what I was going through. A normal person does not start losing

their hair at 21. What I was going through put my body under such an extreme amount of

stress. It started to deteriorate. One of the things was my hair. There was a lot of

things that were fucking up with me. When you are in an extreme level of stress, your

body’s going to break the fuck down. It cannot withstand it. So what I was going through,

y’all have no fucking clue and you would crumble under what the fuck I went through. So you

want to talk shit about my hairline? Go ahead. You couldn’t handle what I went through. So

I don’t give a fuck. I literally don’t give a shit about my hairline. Whatever. I’d like

to have full hair, but I’m like, really? I don’t give a fuck. Who gives a shit? Literally,

who cares? Who actually cares? It’s not that big of a fucking deal. I’m 24. I got receiving

hair. Whatever, bitch. Who cares? There’s worse shit going on in the world. I’m six

foot seven. I have muscles. I’m kind of cute. I have nice teeth. What the fuck? Who cares

about my hairline? Literally, it’s fleece to my worries. But shaving my head solved

the problem a little bit. It made me more confident to just shave my fucking head than

to look like I’m trying to hold on to my hair. So that also went into my decision to shave

it. Also, it looks a lot more clean cut. It’s very, very fitting. I love it. I feel like

it looks more like me. It has that edge to it that I have to my personality. I feel like

this hair represents me more and feels more accurate than my long fucking hair. I feel

like I just look very immature and messy. Because I would do my hair messy because I’m

trying to hide my motherfucking forehead. It’s big as it is. Then the hairline’s receding.

But also waking up in the morning and having to do one-on-one calls, having to do my fucking

hair and make sure it looked okay, it’s very inconvenient. Now I can literally wake up

out of fucking bed and my hair looks fine. It looks totally normal. I might have a piece

of lint, but I’ll get it out. Then I’m ready to go. It’s just very convenient for me to

shave my head. You just heard all of the reasons why I shaved my head. So I decided to fucking

do it. Also, it grows back, girl. I’ll be just fine. If I hated it, I would have just

grown it back out and been like, whatever. But there was so many upsides to me shaving

my head that I was like, fuck it, we’re doing it. I just fucking buzzed it at home. Now

I buzz it every week. That’s where I say, ask yourself if the change that you want to

make is going to make things more convenient. It’s so much more convenient for me to just

buzz my damn head. To try and go through all the hassle, fuck it. You heard it all. I’m

really okay, bitch. I’m not trying to go through all that. I’m fucking busy. I have

too much shit to do to be worried about some fucking hair. All right. Okay, now I want

to hit on style for a second because a lot of people are confused about their style and

a lot of y’all are like, what the fuck when it comes to mine? Because I only wear black

and y’all know that black and gold. I’ve tried to change my style so many times. I have dressed

in all black since 12th grade, senior year of high school. Like I was like 17 when I

started wearing black because it just felt more comfortable. It felt more me. It felt

more like, I don’t know how to explain it. I just feel like myself when I have my little

black Timberlands on and my black clothes and my gold jewelry. I just feel glee. Okay.

But also my family wears all black. Like all the cars we have are all black. It’s like

black is just our fucking thing. We’re Albanian too. So it’s like, it’s just fitting. It just

looks good. It just feels the most me, but I know how I’ve always wanted to dress. Okay.

I one didn’t feel confident in my body a long time ago. Like I would wear t-shirts

instead of like wife beaters, but I knew how I wanted to look and I tried so many times

to wear color. I’ve had so many people try and force me to wear color and I’ve tried

it and every time I put on anything other than black, I feel uncomfortable. Like it

might look good, but it does not feel right. Like something just feels off. One, I can’t

fucking spill anything. I have to like watch what I do. It’s like, girl, fuck that. It’s

too much of a headache. It’s convenient to wear black. One, two, it just feels like more

of me. And three, like trying to go change my whole fucking wardrobe to incorporate color.

Like I like when people wear color, I can appreciate it on other people, but black is

just it bitch. It’s just me. Like I can’t describe it. Like I just feel so off, uncomfortable.

I don’t feel confident when I’m wearing anything other than black. Like it’s just, I’m really

okay. I’ll just do my own goddamn thing. But my point of bringing this up as I tried so

many times to dress, to appeal to others. Like I see other people with cute outfits,

so I’d buy colored shit and I never fucking wear it because it just feels weird. And anytime

I would wear it, I just didn’t like it. I’ve tried so hard to appeal to other people and

I just, I’m no longer willing to appeal to others by making myself uncomfortable. Like

if you don’t like the way that I dress, I don’t give a fuck. I feel more comfortable.

I know I look cool. I know I look good. Fuck you. But go ahead with your little fucking

colored shit. I don’t mind. I don’t give a fuck that you wear color. So you shouldn’t

give a fuck that I wear black. Mind your goddamn business. But my whole point is you

know what you feel most confident in. So wear it. Stop trying to look a certain way. I don’t

dress like with the trends or I don’t buy shit because it’s trendy. I buy shit because

I like it and I keep in mind what am I going to feel comfortable in because I’ll be fucked

if I spend any more money in this life on some fucking clothes I don’t feel confident

in. Like I’ve wasted so much money and so much time trying to change my style. Literally

just fucking wear what you know you like. Not because other people like it, but because

it feels like an accurate representation of yourself. What do you feel most confident

in and then wear that. And if it feels more confident to change your style into something

that’s more like representative of what you feel like inside, do it. And don’t feel sorry

for it. But that’s the whole thing is dress the way that feels accurate to you and makes

you feel confident. Don’t dress to what other people like because I don’t wear a lot of

shit that normal people wear. I just don’t like it. One more thing I want to bring up

about like changing things, especially with style, is there’s a difference between something

being uncomfortable because it’s something new and something being uncomfortable because

it’s just fucking uncomfortable and it feels wrong. So anytime you switch your style you’re

going to feel uncomfortable. It’s going to be new. Like you’re going to feel confident

in it but it’s going to feel a little off because it’s different to what you’re used

to. So just pay attention to does it feel weird because it’s new or does it feel weird

because it feels wrong and it makes you less confident. There’s two different feeling states

but pay attention to that. And if you wear something for a certain period of time and

you still feel really uncomfortable it’s probably not because it’s just new anymore.

So you know what’s a good idea to change it to what would make you feel more confident.

So now let’s jump into what would Leo do. That’s where you guys write in and ask for

advice and I give you what I would do in your situation and I also give you kind of advice

on how to handle it. But these are all going to be about wanting to change yourself. It’s

fitting for the episode but I do want to let you guys know if you want to be featured in

what would Leo do I’m going to leave a link in the description of where you can go and

fill out your submission. It’s going to be completely anonymous but I was having you

guys DM me on Instagram but the shit’s just too overwhelming. I need it all in one place.

So I’m going to put a link in the description of where you can submit your situation for

what would Leo do. So our first situation is a girl who wants to get plastic surgery.

She wants to get her boobs done. So I love plastic surgery. I’m all for like changing

and altering shit but be careful god damn it. But she wants to get her boobs done but

she’s hesitating and she wants like help kind of like weeding out how to stop hesitating

and how to know if she only wants her boobs done because guys like big boobs or because

she wants big boobs. So what I would do in your situation is ask myself first do I want

bigger boobs? Is getting bigger boobs going to make you feel more confident in your own

body? Like if you sit there and you visualize like having bigger tits like are you going

to feel more confident like yeah. Are you going to feel better about being in your own

body just if no one’s around. If no one is around you are you just going to feel more

confident with bigger boobs because that’s going to weed out like yeah I’ll feel more

confident because guys will look at me. Pretend no one’s around. Would you still feel more

confident in your body if your breasts was bigger? I do want to reassure you that it’s

okay to have small boobs. It’s totally fine to have like normal boobs. I want to make

sure you know that’s not weird. Like I want to give you that reassurance but you’re allowed

to want to change them. You’re allowed to want smaller boobs or bigger boobs. Like you’re

totally allowed to want either. And like the trends are going to come and go. So like big

boobs in a BBL was like the thing to have in like 2016. Now it’s to look like fucking

Bella Hadid with like a tiny waist, a decent ass and like little tits. Like the trends

are going to come and go. So I want you to make a decision based off of what’s going

to make you feel more confident in your own body and not what would make you more appealing

to others. Like having bigger tits is going to make you more appealing to certain men

which is like a plus. But that’s not the reason that you get them. Unless they’re paying for

them. The next thing I would look at is why you want them. Like is there any personal

reason that you want bigger boobs? That’ll help you kind of like make the decision. But

also you can always get them smaller. Like if you get your boobs done and you don’t like

it, you can always reverse it. You can always get smaller boobs. Like I mean you’re going

to have to go back into surgery which sucks and it’s always a risk going under anesthesia.

But it’s not like a life or death fucking thing. Okay? Like you can get them smaller.

You can get them bigger. Like you can flip it back and forth. But just base your decision

off of what you want and what would make you feel more confident and what would make you

feel more comfortable. But the biggest point I want to make with plastic surgery to anyone

who’s considering anything. Plastic surgery is the number one place you do not take a

chance with your fucking body. Do not try and find a fucking deal. Do not try and coupon.

Bitch, cough it up. Pay the fucking money for the good surgeon, for the good doctor,

for the good shit. All right? That’s the one thing that I never skimp on is food and plastic

surgery or anything like you’re going to alter your body. Do not buy the cheap shit. Do not

try and find no fucking coupon. Suck it up. Save the extra money and go fucking get it

done right. One, so you don’t fuck your body up. And two, for your own safety. Because

there’s a lot of fucking horror stories about people getting infections and having shit

fucked up or having boobs be crooked. Like you don’t want to fuck anything up with your

body because something might be irreparable. So just remember me saying your body is the

number one place you do not take a fucking chance trying to save money. Now coupon as

much as you want with other shit. Clothes, wanting to get alcohol cheaper like drinking

in the car before you go to the bar. Fine. I do that. But do not skimp when it comes

to plastic surgery. Do your fucking research. Find the good doctors and go to them. Trust

me. It’s for your own peace of mind and also increasing your chances of better results

and also your safety. Like it’s the biggest thing. So the next person asked, how can I

be more decisive when I’m shopping for clothes? You mentioned your style and you’re confident

with it and what you wear, even if it’s not trendy. How do I find my style? I’m going

to take you through my decision making process for when I’m buying shit. Cause I told you

I’ve made a lot of mistakes and I’ve wasted a lot of fucking money. But like I said before,

you want to buy shit that makes you feel more confident and that makes you feel more you.

But a couple of the questions that I wrote for like what I go through mentally when I’m

trying to decide to buy something or not buy it is will it take effort for me to wear it?

Like if I’m looking at a certain shirt or like a bag or some shoes, will it take effort

for me to have to style this thing or wear this thing? I’m someone that operates kind

of like a uniform. I got wife beaters, I got black tees, I got black jeans, black sweatpants

and black shoes. I do have a pair of white shoes that I’ve been wearing recently, but

they’re very easy to style. So look at with something that you’re considering buying.

Is it easy to style? Is it something that you already wear? Like will it replace something

that you already use daily? Will it take like a lot of effort for you to fucking like incorporate

it into what you’re wearing? Don’t buy it because if it takes effort to wear it, you

ain’t gonna fucking wear it. It’s gonna sit in a goddamn closet. Trust me, I have so much

shit in my closet that I do not fucking wear because it’s too hard to style. I need things

I can just throw and go and just know that they’re going to look good. That’s another

benefit of only wearing black is it fucking matches. I can put on anything in my closet

and it fucking matches. It works. And I’m going to give you an example of trying to

replace something that you already wear. Let me go grab these fucking bags because I’m

going to tell you the mistake that I made and how you can avoid it. If you’re listening

to the audio version of this and you’re not watching it on YouTube, bitch, come to YouTube,

but you’re not going to understand what I’m going to try and describe it. So I’m holding

up a black bag, a black messenger bag with a golden Medusa head on it. It’s a little

Versace bag. This fucking bag is my favorite bag. I wear it constantly. I love it to death.

I had an itch to get a new bag for whatever fucking reason. I have a fetish for bags.

I just wanted to buy a new bag. So I was trying to go through my decision making process of

like Leo, what can it replace? Like I wear this nonstop. So I want to get something that

I can grab as easily as I grab this because it goes with fucking everything. It’s cute.

If it’s my gun, like it’s the perfect fucking bag. So I was like, all right, if I’m going

to buy a bag, it’s going to be something that I can use to like alternate this out with

like as effortlessly as I could just grab this and go. I want my other bag to be like

that. Now I’m going to show you the bag that I bought and when I show it to you, shut the

fuck up. Don’t fucking be mean. For those of you on the audio version, I’m holding up

a white Versace bag. It’s like the same shape. It’s a little bit bigger than the black one,

but it’s the same fucking thing as the black one, but it’s just white leather instead of

black. Like it’s a white messenger bag. Okay. Now the shape, everything fine. If this bag

was black, I would wear it all the fucking time, but I decided I wanted to try something

new and like go out of my style a little bit. I wore this bag one fucking time. I don’t

wear this because it’s not me. Like don’t waste your fucking time trying to be different

because what do I use now, bitch? This still, I don’t fucking use this. I’m going to list

this for sale soon. Like it’s literally like basically brand fucking. I used it one time.

I didn’t set it down nowhere. Like it was just on my body. This is the prime example

of how you can still fuck up and don’t do it. Like just listen to me. Trust me. If you

know you have something that you like, just fucking stick with it. Unless you have something

that is like you love it and you can’t leave the fucking store without it. Do not buy it

because like I said, this is something like that. I thought I could alternate with that,

but when the fuck do I wear white? This was a lapse in judgment for me. Okay. And like

I said, I’ve worn it once, so it was a fucking like waste. Like it did teach me how to be

more decisive and like solidify that I need to be fucking picky with like what I wear

and like what I know I won’t wear. But like in the moment I was so excited about this.

I loved it so much, but then I’m like trying to style it and it’s taking a lot of effort

to style it. And when I put on an outfit, when I put on the black one, it just feels

more me. It just like fits. It looks better. Like, but when I put this on, I have not found

an outfit where this looks better than the black one. So it just pisses me the fuck off

that I even bought it. I’m upset about it and I’m going to fucking sell it. All right.

But just learn from me and my mistake and buy shit that’s easy for you to style something

that already goes into your wardrobe. Now, if I wore a lot of white, I’m sure it would

be cute. I don’t wear white. My desk is white and that’s it. So our next situation is someone

wrote in and asked, basically they put like a long description, but I’m just going to

sum it up. They basically asked, how do I get people to think that I’m cool? And I kind

of went through this. Like I told you guys, I’ve changed everything about myself as many

times as you could fucking think of to get people to like me. But if you want to look

more cool, what I would do is switch my focus from trying to look cool and put my effort

into trying to be cool. Like don’t waste your time trying to look cool because you’re going

to feel imposter syndrome. You’re going to feel like a fucking wacko. You’re gonna feel

like fake and people will be able to feel it. People can tell when you’re trying and

when you’re like faking it. But don’t try to look cool. Try to be cool. And the way

that you can be cool is by doing cool shit. Like do interesting things. Spend time doing

interesting things. Do fun things. Do fun shit. And the biggest thing with being cool

is don’t go with the flow just because it’s what everybody else does. Don’t do shit that

everybody else is doing. Do things that you want to do. If it happens to be things that

other people do, do it. But don’t only do things just because other people do them.

Check in with yourself with what you like and what you want to do and then do that also.

Because this is what will draw people to you. It will make them want to be around you. Spend

time with you. They’ll look at you like, oh my god, they’re the coolest fucking person

ever. They’re doing all this shit. People don’t have the balls usually to go outside

the box and do what they want to do. So for you to go do what you want to do and be confident

in it and fucking do it because you enjoy it, people are going to be envious and they’re

going to like it and it’s going to make you seem a lot more cool because you are going

to be cool. You’re doing what you fucking like even if other people think it’s fucking

weird. But doing what everybody else does is like not cool. The only people who are

going to think that you’re cool if you’re doing normal shit is other people who do normal

shit. Like actual cool people don’t think that normal Joe Schmo ass people are cool.

The only people that are going to think you’re cool if you do Joe Schmo shit are Joe Schmos.

Like that’s not actually being cool. That’s looking cool to people but it’s not actually

being cool. Is this making sense? And the other way I kind of look at this is like if

I think something is lame, I’m not going to do it. But I don’t look at things like oh,

that’s what people think is lame so I’m not going to do it. I don’t not do things that

I want to do because other people will think that they’re lame. If I want to do something,

I’ll fucking do it. Like I roller skate. Like I grew up roller skating like with little

quads like little like what’s the skates with the four? That’s quads. Like the four wheels.

Like one, two, three, four. And like you just like skate around. I grew up skating

and I fucking always loved it. But I thought it was weird for like my big ass to go around

skating and then I met a friend who also likes to skate. So like me and her used to go skate

around town and shit. And it’s like it’s just so much fun. It’s a little exercise. Fine.

Good time. Put on a little music. But other people would look at that and be like oh that’s

fucking lame. But I don’t give a shit. Like I think it’s fun. I like it so I do it. But

if you think skating is lame or you’re just not interested in it then don’t do it. But

don’t do things just because you’re scared they might look lame to other people. Do it

regardless if you want to do it. Like I want to go to a trampoline park so bad. Like the

indoor like buildings with like all the trampolines. It’s like for kids and shit. But I love shit

like that. Like I want to go play on a fucking trampoline so bad. Like I’m trying to like

yell at my friends like hey can we go? Like I’m not going to go alone. Like I’m going

to make them go with me. Because I’m going to eat them up with the flips and shit. Because

I can do flips. The fuck? So like I’m so excited to go do that. But other people would look

at that and be like that’s fucking lame. And I look at it like no it’s fun. Like I

get why it would be perceived as lame. It’s a little weird. But I want to fucking do it.

And the biggest thing with looking cool and like being cool is doing shit regardless of

what other people think. Like having a different opinion is cool. Having something that you

like and then doing it regardless is cool as fuck. People wish that they could do that.

People are so driven by society and being accepted and all that shit. It’s like they’re

going to look at you like you’re over here fucking skating you fucking loser. But like

inside they’re going to be like ugh I wish I had the balls to like go do something I

wanted to do. You see? Also if there’s a conversation going on or you’re in a conversation and it’s

lame as fuck or you’re bored. Like walk away. Like just literally leave it. And I’m not

saying like if it’s a one on one conversation. Like switch the conversation to something

more like enjoyable. But if you’re in a conversation with multiple people and it’s boring. Fucking

walk out of it. Like walk away from it. Don’t just sit there and like be bored as shit in

a conversation just to look like you’re in conversation. Like go find something more

important to do. Go have fun. What the hell? Like if I’m at a party or something and people

are boring I’ll walk away. Like I’m going to go find some fun. I’ll go be the fun if

I have to go be the fun. But I don’t play around with like lame shit. Like if I’m in

a conversation and I’m like bored I’m not going to hang out in it. And like if it’s

a one on one thing I’m just going to like change the topic. Like very sly and very like

slick to be something that I actually like to talk about or like am interested by. And

this will give you the allure of like you care about your time and people will respect

that. It’s like when you go to a party or an after party or some shit and you know when

to call it a fucking night or like you go out and it gets like boring. You know when

to call it a fucking night and leave. People are going to know you don’t like doing shit

just for the like fact of doing it. Like you have to be stimulated. You have to have fun.

It has to be enjoyable or you’re not doing it. That is cool. That’s cool as fuck. It’s

people who know when to call it a night because they hate going out with people who are like

partying in someone’s kitchen at like 5am. No I don’t do that no more. When I was going

the fuck through it that was me. No more bitch. If it’s not fun I’m leaving. If it’s boring

I’m not there. I’m going to go be the fun. But the biggest thing with that is like people

are going to respect you and respect your time because they know you’re not going to

hang out in something that’s not like fun for you that you don’t like. That is going

to make people think you’re cool as fuck and that’s what’s actually going to make you

cool. If you like this podcast episode leave this video a thumbs up. Leave me a comment

too on this video about anything that you learned from it or anything you liked about

it. Give me your feedback. I’d love to hear it. Also send this episode to anyone that

you think it would help because I like to spread awareness you know so help me on that.

Also if you have any ideas for future podcast episodes or anything you want to hear me talk

about you can leave a comment in the description and also for what would Leo do if you want

to be on it. The link is in the description like I said. You just go in there and put

in Leo’s situation and I got you. And also if you’re listening to the audio version of

this podcast give me five stars. Also the link will be in the description if you want

to work with me one on one and if you want to follow me on Instagram because why not?

My Instagram is theleoskeppy but I will also link it in the description too. So that’s

all I got for this episode. I hope you learned something from it but everybody stay safe.

Take care of your goddamn self and I will see you next Sunday.