Aware & Aggravated - 56. Everything I Wish I Knew Before Starting A Business

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Hi friends, today we’re talking all things business.

This is going to be everything that I wish someone fucking told me before I started my

business and lost a lot of money.

Because I’ve started a few now and I’ve probably lost close to like 35-ish thousand dollars

and I’m going to go through everything mentally, how to set up and prepare for shit and then

just some tips about how to like navigate things and save yourself some money because

if someone’s going to learn something from it, let it be you.

Don’t make the same mistakes I did and don’t let your mind get in the way of shit, okay?

And then I’m going to leave you off with a message at the end of how to know if you’re

cut out for it and I’m going to tell you if you have what it takes or not, how to tell.

Or go work your ass at a normal fucking job.

So we have a lot to cover.

I have a giant list in front of me but let’s just jump into it.

So the first thing with mindset and my biggest heartbreak with business that I want to prevent

you from because it crippled my ass is you need to disconnect the thought of being a

good person and having a good heart from being successful.

It doesn’t fucking matter if you have a good heart.

It doesn’t fucking matter how helpful you want to be and how good your intentions are

and how pure you are.

It doesn’t fucking matter.

Business is strategy.

That’s rule fucking number one to get, okay?

Don’t go through the heartbreak that I did.

The universe is not going to back you.

God himself is not going to back you.

Business is strategy.

It is not heart.

Take your fucking heart out of it.

It’s good to have good intentions.

It’s good to have a pure heart.

You have to have something that’s going to like burn inside you to keep you going with

the business because it’s a lot.

But what I’m saying is having a good heart and having a good intentions does not lead

to success.

It does not lead to you making money.

It does not lead to you doing right and doing well.

Or else the world would look a lot fucking different.

Business is about your skills, not your heart, okay?

Remember me yelling this at you because I needed someone to hit me upside the fucking

head with it.

Everything is about your skills and business is a skill.

Becoming business minded is a skill and you need to learn it and you need to invest all

your time and energy into your skills, not your heart and daydreaming and thinking about

all these good things that make you feel good.

You got to get down in the fucking square reality of life, not this spiritual shit that

people talk about.

I’m also going to talk about not following your fucking purpose.

That’s a crock of shit in a few minutes.

But my biggest point with this is do not expect having a good heart to get you far or guarantee

you anything.

Having a good heart and being successful don’t go together.

They don’t coincide.

One does not stack on the other.

Sure, it’s good to have a good heart.

It’s good to have good intentions.

But if you go into a business and creating anything with just focusing on your sole intention

of like I want to help people.

I want to do this thing.

I want to whatever because I have good intentions.

You’re going to be heartbroken.

Life is going to knock you upside the fucking head and knock you on your ass.

And you’re going to be left in that pit of hopelessness that I was in.

So go ahead and disconnect that out of your brain right now.

Having a good heart does not mean you’re going to be successful.


There’s so many more things that play into it.

But with that, let’s jump into the next thing.

I’m going to talk about self-doubt for a second because a lot of people deal with not feeling

good enough.

That’s one of the number one things I see come across my coaching applications is like

every single person.

I don’t care if they’re a millionaire or someone that’s struggling financially.

Every single one of these people that apply to work with me, all right in their fucking

application, they deal with not feeling good enough and they want help with it.

That’s something that’s always going to come up.

But the biggest thing that helped me with not feeling good enough is you have to understand

what you’re doing when you have a business.

If you’re offering a service or a product, it’s not about you.

It’s not about you not feeling good enough.

This is about what you can do for others, what value is being given.

It’s not about the person usually.

I’m speaking real vague and real big.

But the thing that’s going to help you with self-doubt is it’s not in you and what’s going

on with you.

It’s in your skills and your abilities.

Your business is your ability or your product or whatever it is.

But an example from my life with my coaching business, I have been in periods where like

my life is a fucking wreck and I’m having to coach myself on the side and also coach

other people.

And a lot of people would get insecure and be like, Oh my God, no, if my life isn’t perfect,

I’m not qualified to help.

And that’s where I’m going to say it does not matter what your life is like while you’re

helping other people.

If you can still provide the service, if you can still provide the value and if I can properly

coach other people, even while I’m dealing with my own shit, that’s perfectly fine.

You’re not a fuck up.

You’re not backwards.

You’re not an imposter.

You’re not a fake.

Life is going to throw shit at you.

And with that example, it’s kind of specific, but a lot of people deal with insecurities.

So that’s one way to nix it.

It’s not about you and your life and what’s going on with you and how you feel and all

of a sudden that you could be breaking down, crying yourself to sleep and then wake up

in the morning and go coach someone and be on your fucking a game.

Like that’s just how things go.

It’s not about yourself.

So remove yourself from that and you’ll be a lot less insecure.

Focus on your abilities and what you’re providing through your business.

That’s what people care about.

And honestly, it takes a really fucking strong and capable person to do the shit that I do.

Like to position as a mentor or any kind of coach, that’s a big role to step into.

And even when my life is falling apart, I was very good at this when I was a nurse too,

is like, it doesn’t matter what’s going on in my life.

When I step in that patient’s room, when I get on the call with one of my clients, I’m

in their world.

I get out of mine and help them navigate theirs.

My abilities don’t go away because I’m dealing with shit and like certain circumstances in

my life.

Like that doesn’t take away from your abilities.

You can still exercise them.

It doesn’t make you any less qualified or capable.

So just focus on that.

It’s about your ability or whatever your product is.

So the next thing that stunted me a lot and held me back a lot is not moving fast.

Bitch, move as fast as fucking possible.

Do not wait.

Do not sit on ideas.

If you have an idea, put your fucking ass behind it quickly.

And there’s a spiritual explanation and then a not spiritual one.

The spiritual explanation is ideas visit you.

They’re not here to hang around all the time.

Ideas are energy that wants to be manifested and actualized.

So this energy has its own consciousness and it will visit people and it’s just taking

a chance visiting different people that it thinks could help manifest it.

So if you have an idea for something and you don’t act on it, the idea is going to

leave you.

So you need to act on shit when you have the idea.

It’s a piece of consciousness that wants to be actualized through you.

So you don’t have long and you need to fucking act on shit while you have it.

Like I said, it’s a visitor.

Ideas visit you.

They’ll fucking leave too.

And they’ll jump to the next person who will actualize them and then it’s too late for


You lost your shot.

So if you have an idea and you have something that’s like burning inside of you, fucking

act on it.

And if there’s something that you’ve had an idea about for a long time and you just never

acted on it and it hasn’t left you, get to it.

That idea wants to be actualized through you in specific, okay?

But it’s not going to hang around for long.

So if you got something that you’ve always wanted to do, fucking do it.

Trust me, just do it.

So also with moving fast, here’s like the real life shit because that was like a little

spiritual example.

But with real life, move fucking quick, bitch.

Get on it.

Stop waiting for things to be perfect and do not paralyze yourself by trying to think

of all the things that can go wrong.

Like you’re going to think of things that can go wrong because that’s how your brain

is wired.

It’s like you’re wired to spot unsafety and things that could hurt you.

And if you’re considering starting a business and you have to get to step one to start it,

if you’re just sitting here behind the start line looking at everything that could go wrong

in the future and not stepping forward, you’re never going to fucking go anywhere.

So that’s something that paralyzed me for a long time was trying to think 10 steps in

advance about things that could possibly go wrong.

Don’t fucking waste your time.

Just do it.

You’re not going to know how to handle shit until you face it, until it’s an actual reality.

So don’t spend time thinking about things that are potentials.

Do things to prepare.


Be smart.

Be calculated.

Be very strategic.

But do not get paralyzed by the thought of like things that haven’t happened yet.

Face them as they happen.

Stop like catastrophizing about shit and just jump into it.

And it’s like with my dad when I was little, I didn’t know how to swim, okay?

So he took me and threw me in the deep end of the pool and he said, sink or swim.

Learn to swim, fucker.

And what did I do?

Learn to swim.

Now, if I sat on the side of the pool and was just sitting there like, okay, I’m going

to learn how to swim and then I’m going to jump in when I feel ready.

You’re going to waste so much fucking time sitting on the side of that pool.

You would learn to swim in about 15 seconds if you just jumped in that bitch.

But sitting on the sideline, you could sit there for a full fucking day and watch YouTube

videos and read things and practice stroking before you’re ever in the water.

Motherfucker, just jump in.

You’ll learn so much faster.

Like everything, speed, remember?

Everything’s fast.

Everything is fast, fast, fast.

Like get up and fucking do it.

Stop waiting on the sidelines.

Stop trying to prepare.

Stop catastrophizing.

Jump in that shit.

If there’s a shark in the water, we’ll deal with it.

But you deal with it once you’re in, bitch.

That’s the thing.

Stop trying to deal with shit and worry and waste time thinking about it before it happens.

I’m not saying with everything, but with most things, you’re just holding yourself back

in your fucking brain.

Okay, so now I want to talk about choosing what to do because there’s so many fucking

things that you can start or like choose to try.

And I want you to walk through the thought process of choose whatever thing that you

can live with the worst case scenario.

Make that be your first goal or like jump.

Make that your first risk.

So any of your options, if there’s a lot of options where the worst case scenario would

be like devastating and you couldn’t handle it, don’t do it.

For your first thing you’re going to try, do the thing that you can actually live with

the worst case scenario.

Like, all right, it would fucking suck ass, but like I would make it or I could figure

it out and I’d be okay.

Try that first.

And the first thing that you pick is not what you have to stick with.

I’m always talking about pick and stick, but with business, you have to be very, very open

and ready to change and shift on like the drop of a hat.

Like everything can shift like in one hour, okay?

From personal experience, be on your fucking toes and be ready, be on your A game.

But don’t get overwhelmed thinking, oh, if I pick this one thing, it’s like, oh, I have

to do only that.

You can literally switch at any minute.

So just literally pick a pool to jump in, jump, learn to swim.

And then when you’re swimming in that pool, think, okay, is there another pool I want

to go try out?

Learn the skills from the first thing first that you feel is manageable.

It’s like if you’re thinking of jumping in a kiddie pool versus jumping in the ocean,

jump in the fucking kiddie pool first, learn the skills, learn what you need to know.

And then you can handle the fucking ocean way easier.

But if you do try to just jump straight for the ocean, a lot of people like you’ll learn

how to fucking swim and you’ll grow so much faster.

But a lot of people get so stuck facing that big ocean, that big scary thing that they’re

not fucking prepared for, they’ll never jump in.

So if you’re at a place where you have this giant vision and this huge thing you want

to do, but you’re too scared to do it, you can’t figure out a way, it’s like whatever

it is, just jump in the kiddie pool first.

Jump at the smaller option, the smaller opportunity, get your fucking feet wet until you feel confident

and you can jump in the ocean or just jump in the fucking ocean.

Literally that’s what I fucking did.

I’ve sunk and I fucking got beat the fuck up and it was rough, rough time.

But like I’m so much further ahead than so many people at 24 years old.

Like the amount I know about life itself, please, and then the amount that I now know

about business is because I took the huge risks.

I jumped into the big shit first.

But I’m saying something’s better than nothing.

So jump in your kiddie pool if you need to or jump in the fucking ocean and figure it


I kind of got off track with that.

But with choosing what to do, look at the advantages you already have.

Like if you have something, what is something that you already have a lot of skills in?

You already have a lot of knowledge about or you’ve already spent a lot of time doing

that you don’t fucking hate.

Like when I chose to make the switch from nursing to all the things that I’m doing,

I’m about to make a clothing line.

I was thinking about making merch, but I have too many designs and I’ve always wanted a

clothing line and I can’t wait to make like everything that I’m going to wear.

Like I just want to replace my wardrobe, you know, but I’m in the middle of making a clothing


But when I made the switch from nursing into trying to start businesses, like that was

a whole different fucking world.

So I understand if you absolutely hate the thing that you’re doing and you want no part

of it, like the medical field can eat my ass.

I don’t want nothing to do with it.

But just know if you choose to do something that you already have experience in, it will

be a lot easier.

It will go a lot faster.

It will be a lot smoother versus if you try something new like I did and you completely

have no fucking clue what you’re doing.

That’s going to take a lot longer.

It’s going to drag the fuck out because you’re starting from like ground zero versus like

ground 50.

If I would have done something in the medical field, like if I got into like medical sales

or created a product or like done something medical wise, I would have been able to execute

a lot faster.

But I chose a different route because the medical field makes me want to kill myself.

So I understand that.

And I relate to that.

A lot of people that preach like business shit, they completely discard the fact that

you have feelings and you have to enjoy your life.

And that’s a good way to navigate that.

Do something you’re already like good at and you already have experience with and you already

have like an upper hand.

Think of the areas or the things where you already have the upper hand.

How do you already have more than most?

How are you already 10 steps ahead with something?

You can choose to go down that route or you can choose to try something completely different.

But I’m just saying if your main concern is money, go down the one that you already know

first and then like I said, you can switch later.

Now I want to talk about following your fucking purpose because all these spiritual shitheads

get on here talking about if you follow your purpose, abundance will follow.

Fuck you personally and individually.

Fuck every single one of you who’s preaching that horse shit because no, no, there’s so

much more to it.

I believe I am in my purpose, but the absolute shit show that’s come with it, they need to

give you a heads up.

If you follow your purpose, abundance will follow, but it is literally going to fucking

ruin you.

It’s going to be so difficult because if you follow something that is like your purpose

and something that you are very emotionally invested in, you’re 10 times more attached

to an outcome.

So when things don’t work, they’re 10 times more devastating.

You’re going to question yourself so much more.

You’re going to question your purpose.

You’re going to quit.

Oh my God, don’t even fucking bother.

If you’re not absolutely 100% clear on your purpose, don’t even fucking bother trying

to start something and find it because you’re going to sit there and be like, I want to

start this business.

I want to start these things, but I have to know my purpose first.

And you’re going to spend all this fucking time wasting, trying to figure out what your

purpose is so you can make the right business.

Fuck that.

If you were like driven about business and you want to create your own thing or you just

have any interest in it and you want to start your own business, fucking start something


Make money, get your fucking shit together, learn some skills, and then take everything

that you learn and invest that and switch.

Like I said, and pivot and choose the thing that makes you feel good and makes you happy

and feels like your purpose.

You can fully shift and you shouldn’t be worrying about finding your fucking purpose until you

got a little money under your belt and you got some skills to apply to following your


Because if you just blindly follow your fucking purpose, you’re fucked.

You literally have to take so much more into consideration.

It sounds so nice to be all spiritual.

Oh my God, I’m going to follow my purpose.

Abundance is just going to follow.

No bitch, you got to set that up.

You have to teach it how to flow in.

It’s not a just magically or like universally orchestrated thing that happens.

I’m sorry to burst your bubble, but I don’t want you to go through the heartbreak that

I fucking went through with all of this.

So literally, don’t fucking worry about your purpose for now.

It will find you.

You can’t not actualize it.

You know, like it’s going to fucking come up.

It’s going to show if you have something that you think is your purpose and you’re

not clear about it, start anything and it will become more and more clear because even

if you go down the wrong road or an opposite direction of your purpose, if you have an

experience where you realize, okay, this is not where I want to go, what are you going

to do?

Turn around off that road and go back in the direction of something else, which could be

your purpose.

You might go down 12 different fucking roads and have to keep turning around.

But if you just stood still and never followed anything, you would be all those 10 roads.

Those are all steps back.

You wouldn’t be closer to your purpose.

Your purpose is not going to be like a pretty direct thing.

You’re going to be like mind fucked and like bounced over all these different things.

Literally do not worry about following your purpose until you’ve made fucking money and

you can follow it.

Don’t worry about enjoying business until you’ve made money and you have the luxury

to choose to follow what you enjoy.

That’s one thing a lot of people fuck up and misguided me on.

I don’t like that shit and I will never steer you guys in the wrong direction.

Shit’s got to get rough for a minute.

You got some things to learn.

It’s easier to learn those things when you’re not following the thing that you’re just so

like, oh my God, emotionally invested in.

Because like I said, every single setback is going to feel like a dagger to the fucking

heart and I don’t want you to deal with that.

I could teach you how to get through it, but I really, really think if you don’t know anything

about business, do not follow how you feel first.

You have a lot of skills to learn and I’m talking to young people now.

If you’re older than me and you’re a lot more in touch with yourself and you have more experience

to draw from, go for it.

You fucking know yourself and if you’re young and you’re like 100% like, yes, I just need

to do this one thing.

I have no interest in anything else.

Fucking do it.

Just take this as a precaution.

Prepare for everything and all of your emotions to be wrapped up in that fucking bitch and

when things seem very devastating, I promise they’re not that bad.

Get back organized and focused, like factual, strategic and analytical.

Get analytical with your purpose if you’re going to try and make it into a business so

it doesn’t get so messy.

Also one more thing with deciding what to do.

Stick to your fucking values because I have so many opportunities at money and I’m not

taking them.

Like I have a lot of brand deals and people reach out to me and offer me like 10 grand,

12 grand.

I’m working on a deal right now for like 15 but that’s what the brand I actually like

but there are a lot of brands that reach out to me and I don’t like their products.

I don’t genuinely like their products so I’m not going to take their money to fucking talk

about it.

I have to turn down money all the time.

Try your best to stick to your values.

It’s going to be hard.

It’s going to be difficult but your self-respect is all you have.

Your character is all you have.

If you lose that to some money, you’re fucking worthless.

That was rough.

That was real rough.

Don’t let money sway you.

And I’m not saying in situations where you like have a choice because a lot of people

don’t have a choice.

Like there are, I’m friends with some strippers and they don’t have a choice.

Like they have to take care of their entire family.

None of them have fucking money so they have to go work.

Do they want to be stripping?

Fuck no.

Do I want to make an OnlyFans?

That is my plan Z.

Okay not even my plan B, C, D. That’s my plan Z.

If everything goes to shit and I have to take care of my family or if I have a situation

where I’m like my livelihood’s at stake, I’m going to exhaust every option and then I’ll

go to that if I have to.

But let me not be so fucking harsh about that because I understand there’s so many things.

Like when I was used to like, can I say this online?

Like when I used to like serve, not as a waiter.

How do I say this?

Like how do I make it clear?

Like when I used to deal cards.

Did I want to be doing that?


Did I have bills to pay?

Did I have a life to fucking maintain?


There are things you have to do and I understand that fully.

I’ve been through a lot of experiences with that.

But hold yourself and your self-respect as high as you can if the situation and the circumstances

allow it.


Don’t just sacrifice your fucking values and shit because things got difficult.

Like if it’s a dire situation, do it.


I’m going to just shut up there because I’m getting heated.


So now I want to talk about do not get legal before you start making money in your business.

I don’t give a fuck if that’s bad business advice.

I wasted so much fucking money and time trying to get legal.

So like with my app, I hired an attorney to trademark it and then I hired that attorney

again to make contracts for me to go hire a developer, an NDA and a work for hire agreement.

So NDA is a nondisclosure.

So any ideas I share, anything that we talk about can’t be disclosed with anyone.

And then I had the work for hire agreement that anything that they make for me is legally


They can’t hold shit.

Once I pay them and they make me something, I own it.

I own every part of it.

I had these contracts made and it was a fucking waste because if these businesses, like I’m

up against the big digital like marketing agency and software development company.

So if I were to try and like act on any of those contracts, let’s say they did make something

for me.

They stole my idea and they took that shit and my money.

What the fuck am I supposed to do?

You have to go hire an attorney to sue them for your contract to even matter.

You can’t just walk in with a contract and be like, you didn’t do what you said.

No bitch.

You got to take them to court.

And probably $100,000 is a fucking lawsuit shit.

You can only act on a contract if you have the money to fight in court.

Don’t fucking worry about a contract.

People are going to fuck you.

People are going to try and like play with you and like everyone in business is looking

out for their own ass.

So I want you to remember that number one.

And it is not wrong for you to look out for your own ass in business.

If you don’t look out for yourself, no one else will.

Remember me saying this.

And again, trust no one till the fucking day I die.

It’s tattooed on me forever unless I lose my hand.

But opening all these companies like an LLC or like a sole proprietorship, anything you

want to open, don’t get fucking legal until you make money.

You need a way to process payment and accept money.

That’s it.

You don’t fucking need all this legal bullshit.

You can get that as you start making money.

But that’s what I’m also going to say.

Don’t spend stupid fucking money.

You don’t need to literally don’t buy shit that is not necessary.

You don’t need all this fancy flashy fucking shit.

What your focus needs to be if you’re starting a business is a way to accept money.

That’s it.

That’s number one.

That’s your first thing.

Not an LLC, not a fucking contract, not a fucking trademark.

Don’t waste your time.

Do not get legal.

Do not invest money into that shit until you are making money.

Trust me, that would have saved me $20,000 fucking dollars.

Okay, so here’s some tips for once you do get legal and you start working with a team,

you hire a company or you start getting legal with anything like you start meeting up with

lawyers, attorneys, anything like that.

These are some tips for that.

So number one is you want to do Zoom meetings or in-person meetings.

You want them to see your fucking face because it is a lot easier to deceive someone, lie

to someone, cheat someone, and fuck someone over that you cannot humanify.



That’s the word.

You can’t personify them.

You don’t look at them as a real human being.

A voice on a phone?

Who the fuck is that?

Could be anything.

Could be anyone.

If they can see you and experience you and you make yourself a real person to them, that’s

kind of a manipulation tactic to solidify.

A lot of businessmen are corrupt as fuck and they’ll fuck you anyway.

They’ll literally watch your whole family dying in front of you and they’ll just stand

there like, well, a lot of business people are cold, it’s very cutthroat.

But my point with that is just a little psychology trick.

People can’t lie as easy when you’re face to face and if they do lie, you can pick up

on it.

It’s hard to tell in just someone’s voice, but if you can watch them, their mannerisms,

if you can get a baseline read of how they usually are and then you see a change in that

behavior that’s usually a lie or some kind of deceit.

Read some fucking books on body language and learn how to read people.

But the biggest thing is talk to them face to fucking face.

If possible.

If not, Zoom meetings.

See your goddamn face.

And read back.

Literally read back.

Every single thing.

You guys agree on or talk about.

That’s a nursing skill that I use and implement all the time with this shit.

It will clear up so many miscommunications.

So when someone says something to you and they agree to something or you’re talking

about ideas.


Let me read this back to you.

Make sure I got it right.

You read back what you just perceived from them saying something.

So you are on the same page at all times.

And if you are at step one and there’s already a miscommunication, you clear it up before

you go to step two.

Trust me.

Read back will save your fucking ass.

Next thing.

If you’re concerned about something.

Say it.

Voice it.

Communicate it.

I don’t give a fuck how stupid it seems.

How insecure.

How childish.

Voice that shit.

Voice anything you are concerned about to anyone that you’re paying or anyone that you’re

working with.

One hundred percent.


If you have any questions, ask.

Do not get off a call or leave an interaction with someone that you are fucking paying without

absolute clarity.

And that’s around anything you have questions on, what they’re expected to do, what you’re

expected to do, what the agreement is, what the timeframe is.

Everything needs to be crystal fucking clear.

And I want you to record all fucking phone calls and write shit down.

Get everything sent in words via their email.

Everything needs to be agreed upon in writing and have auditory recordings of shit.

Because a lot of people try and go back on like things that they’ve said to me.

Like with my development team, it’s like there was a lot of miscommunication and they said

one thing and then when I thought it was one way and I clarified that, they said, no, we

didn’t say that.

Record that fucking shit.

Record every fucking call you have.

Because people like to go back on their word, especially if they get in a pinch.

Like I said, everyone’s out for their own fucking ass.

Clock them.

Prevent that shit.

And with that, I want to say, do not hire a fucking company to do shit.

Like when I created Positive Focus, my app, I hired a really big company because that’s

what I wanted because it made me feel like more stable and more like secure with having

my app created and developed.

I felt more official and I felt like it was more organized.

No bitch, it costs 10 times fucking more and they’re just as unorganized as other people.

Find a student.

Find a student for anything that you’re wanting to start, whether it’s creating websites,

designing apps, making brochures, photography, anything.

Go find fucking students at a university.

Go find people on Fiverr.

Go find people anywhere you fucking can before you go to a big business.

Trust me.

Because they’re going to be a lot fucking cheaper and they’re going to be a little bit

more invested in the result because they’re still trying to learn and prove themselves

and they need the money most of the time versus a big business.

They’re just going to take your money and then they don’t give a fuck.

They want the invoice paid and then once they give you something, they don’t care if

it fails or fucking does good.

They’re literally only concern is the invoice and they don’t give a fuck.

Their concern is making more money and if they can charge you again and fuck you, they


So that’s what you’re dealing with with a bigger company.

So find students, find people you can hire, find people that are cheaper, okay?

Like they’re going to care a lot more and just trust me on that.

I had someone give me that advice of hire a student to develop my app and I considered

it, but I just didn’t feel like I was good.

I didn’t feel confident in it.

Like I didn’t think it was like a good idea until I saw how fucking poor of a job this

giant company like did.

It’s not that they were bad, but like the experience of it, shit, literally what the


Like it’s basic as my app is.

Oh my God.

I had one of my friends that I was like one of my party friends who was an app developer.

I had two, but each of them said they could do it for me or from like three to $5,000

and it should take like a month max with all the other work that they’re doing.

But I did not feel confident when I saw these people behave.

They didn’t take shit serious.

They were not business oriented.

They did not keep their word.

They would talk a lot of shit and not follow through with it.

And I was also in a smaller town in Pensacola, Florida when I was starting my app and I wanted

someone that I could see face to face.

And that’s where I’m going to get into where my trust issues kind of fucked me.


I just realized I’ve had this fucking laptop stand sitting here this whole time.

Oh my God.


And I just had to plug my laptop in.

So now we got a cord.

We’re a mess today, but who gives a shit?

So I wanted someone that I could see face to face because if anything went wrong, if

they tried to fuck me, I wanted to be able to get my hands on them.

And I made that very clear.

But my biggest thing was trying to find people in my area.

Don’t fucking waste your time.

Literally you can work with fucking anybody.


Don’t be like me.

Don’t be too paranoid because it’ll probably bite you in the ass like it did me.

But when I started working with this big company, they were like in this bougie ass bank.

They were at the top floor.

And when I went to our first meeting with the owner, I was like meeting with the whole

team and I was like, okay, just to be clear, you know who you’re dealing with.

I have these contracts.

Everything’s in place.

It’s fine.

We all know about contracts.

But if you guys try and fuck me, I’ll light this fucking building on fire.

And I just want y’all to know, like I’m very prepared for shit to go south and I have nothing

to fucking lose.

So like I was already suicidal at the point.

Like I was like, this app is the last little bit of fucking anything.

Like I’m here to like make this app and kill myself was my fucking plan.

I was going to like make it, hope it like blew up and did something cool and then kill

myself so I could leave behind like something, you know?

But I literally was like, I have nothing to fucking lose and I will light y’all shit

on fire.

Like you can play with me in business, but I want you to be aware of who you’re going

to play with.

So you think smart.

You think twice.

And I instilled a little fear into them and I was dead ass fucking serious.

And all of them were scared.

And that was the relationship we had and I was taken very serious.

I don’t recommend doing this.

I would not do that again.

Like just let them find out.

Don’t warn someone if you’re going to attack them or fuck them up.

Just fucking do it.


Don’t talk about it.

Just be prepared.

Catch them off guard if you’re going to do that.

Anyway, my whole thing with that was trying to hire a company.

Let that be your last option.

Let that be your last fucking option because it will save you probably like five times

the amount versus hiring a student, maybe even 10 times, honestly.

And you’re going to get a lot better results and a lot better work ethic from the student.




So now I want to talk about advertising, bitch.

Learn advertising before you put money into it.

Literally read as many books as you can, take some courses, do everything that you can to

learn about advertising, ads, sales, everything about that before you start dumping money

into it.

Because I’ve wasted a few thousand dollars on Facebook ads.

I thought it’s easy.

I thought you just log in and fucking put some money in and you just put some keywords

and boom, it’s done and you make a million dollars.


Here’s the reason people charge so much fucking money to run their Facebook ads.

Just learn as much as you can first.

Hire someone if you have to, but you’re capable of a lot more than you think and you can learn

a lot more than you fucking think before you hire someone.

But just remember me saying before you pay to advertise, learn everything you fucking

can because that’s money you can’t get back.

You will learn a lot of lessons.

You’ll learn a lot of what not to do, but if you’re starting a business and you’re tight

on funds, don’t dump money into something that you don’t fucking know about.

Just trust me.

Oh my God.

I could have bought a few bags with the amount that I fucking lost on Facebook.

And the next thing with that is get clear on your target audience.

Like okay, I want to help people.

A lot of people say that.


Get clear on who?

Get clear on your target audience, your target person that you’re trying to sell something

to or the person you’re trying to help.

Who would benefit from what you have to offer?

Be very clear on your target audience.

And one of the best books, because I’m talking about learn as much as you can, I’ve read

a lot of books on this shit and I’ve taken a few courses.

I don’t want to talk about people’s courses that have been shitty, but a lot of them are

fucking shitty.

But one of the best books that I’ve ever fucking found is a hundred million dollar offers by

Alex Ramosi.

I have two physical copies of the book.

I have a hardback, a paperback, and they’re each like 22, 23 bucks.

They should be a thousand fucking dollars each as good as they are.

But they also have a digital download version that’s 99 cents.

None of this is sponsored.

I’m just telling you straight the fuck up.

That’s one of the books that shifted everything in my brain, got me comfortable with sales

and wrapped it all up in one pretty nice little fucking book.


The next thing I want to warn you for is get prepared for your life and everything in it

to come second.

Your business is its own thing.

It’s its own entity.

It’s its own everything.

And prepare for your life to come second.

And my example with this, and a couple of tips I have that are going to come out in

this story, my mom was like deathly fucking ill and I had to rush her to the emergency

room one day and I had a call scheduled with my app development team and I was in the middle

of the ER and I made sure my mom was okay.

Made sure she was all good, stable, she was fine.

I told her I was going to go outside and I went and I sat in the car and I had my fucking

business conference in the car while my mom was in the hospital, sick as fuck, throwing

up about to die.

Not really.

But it was bad.

Like I was so emotional and like worried and concerned, but I had to switch it off, get

into business mode and do my fucking conference.

I could have easily rescheduled, but I don’t like to fuck around with a whole team like


Like waste everybody’s time.

I don’t like that shit.

It’s not one of my values, my character traits.

Like I respect everyone’s time.

I expect mine to be respected.

So I’m going to give you the same courtesy.

I went my ass outside, got in the car and had my conference call on zoom in the fucking


I told the team what was happening, but I showed I was committed to my business and

having the fucking call and we had it.

And the other thing I’m going to say with that is be prepared to speak, present, talk,

recall things with nothing.

I didn’t have a notebook.

I didn’t have my laptop.

I didn’t have anything.

And I still had to navigate that entire fucking meeting.

And you need to be able to do this if you’re going to have a business.

You can’t rely on your fucking little notebook and your computer and your fucking little


Like you have to be able to speak, be efficient, be strategic and be organized with no resources.

You have your brain in your mouth, figure it the fuck out.

Like it’s going to take time.

It’s going to take practice, but there’s so many skills and like character development

things that need to happen for you to be able to run a business.

So it’s very serious and that’s a huge thing that will help you.

You have to be able to adapt.

You have to be able to control your emotions to a point you can switch them off.

Like when I was walking out of the hospital, I had to switch them off.

Like I had to go from panicked and upset and worried to get your fucking ass in business

mode, stand the fuck up and lead this fucking conference.

Like so I did.

But that’s something that a lot of people struggle with.

If you can’t separate your emotions and what needs to be done, you’re not going to make it.

Alright, I’ve got a couple other tidbits of like information I want to throw at you.

So the biggest thing with productivity is setting limits on yourself and constraints

to get shit done.

And when you set a limit for yourself, it’s not up for discussion.

It’s to be taken serious and you get your ass on it.

You do it.

Anytime I’ve started something new or created something, switched my business around, anything

like that, I gave myself a time frame.

I’m like, oh, I could do this probably in like two weeks.

Nah, I want it done by the weekend.

I give myself such tight constraints.

I will be so fucking stressed out.

So worried.

I don’t know how I’m going to do it.

Ah, like I’m going to have to neglect other areas of my life.

But you know what happens when you set a time constraint, you squirm and you get it the

fuck done.

And even if you don’t get it all done, you get so much more done than you thought.

I do have a whole podcast episode about motivation, discipline, productivity.

Those are three different episodes.

You can go listen to them.

But you can accomplish a lot more than you think in a short amount of time.

You just have to put that cap on yourself and make yourself squirm.

You need to give yourself that stress of a time cap.

And the time cap is to be respected.

Like I said, your business is your own separate thing.

It’s not you you’re letting down.

You need to look at it like it’s its own separate entity because it is.

And when you make a promise to that, you fucking fulfill it.

You hold up to it.

It’s not you that’s suffering.

It’s your business that’s going to suffer.

So get your shit together.

Okay, the next piece of advice I have is take responsibility for everything.

I don’t care what the situation is, what the circumstance is.

Everything is your fault.

If you’re starting a business or you have a business.

Every single thing is your fault.

I don’t care who, what, when, where, why fucked up.

It’s your fault.

You have to go in it with that mindset because you own the business.

If something goes wrong in the business, who deals with the consequences?


There’s no one else to deal with it.

No one is going to help you, especially if you run something on your own like I do.

There’s no one to blame.

And even if there is someone to blame, cool, you blamed them.

But who’s dealing with the consequences?

You bitch.

You have to take responsibility for everything because you’re the one that has the consequences.

Who gives a fuck whose fault it is?

It’s yours.

Now, there’s a couple of questions that I ask myself when things go wrong.

If I like hire a team or like I’m working with someone on something.

There’s a couple of questions I ask myself when things go wrong or I have situations

like fuck up with my businesses.

So the first one is, what do I know now?

Because it’ll pull you out of like focusing on what’s happened and pull you into the moment.

Okay, what do I know now?

At this given point in time, it puts you back in reality, like right here, right now in

the present.

You reflect on what you’ve learned and then get clear on how this situation can be prevented

in the future.

What can I do to prevent this in the future?

Not what can so-and-so do that lets you down.

What can I do to prevent this in the future?

Like I said, everything is your fault.

Everything is your responsibility.

Take that shit.

If you can’t handle that responsibility, if you can’t handle that pressure, don’t start

a business.

But getting clear on what you know now and how you’re going to prevent this in the future

will make you feel a lot better about the situation and you’ll feel a lot more prepared

and less scared because you have a way to solve this from happening again.

You won’t have to worry about it anymore.

It’ll just be something that happened.

You got through it.

You learned and it’s not happening again.

And these are the moments where you learn so much.

Business is a lousy fucking teacher.

When you fail and when things fuck up is when you learn the skills, the ideas, the perspectives,

the thought processes, and resources.

These are the times where you can connect to different resources you didn’t know that

you had to help you handle shit.

Like, oh my god, it’s the best thing.

When things fuck up and go wrong, they suck, sure, but that’s where the growth is.

That’s where everything that you need that’s going to propel you forward is going to come


So get clear on those moments, what you learned.

What do I know now?

Okay, so the next thing I want to talk about is something that a lot of people post and

it’s that your new life will cost you your old one.

And that’s very true.

When you have a desire for something or do you want to change something about your life

or start something new, whatever it is, your new life and your new thing that you want,

your new reality is going to cost you your current one.

And what people don’t tell you about that is the next version of you who can handle

the reality you want and the next version of you who is experiencing what it is that

you want is going to cost you who you are now.

And that is where you’re going to get fucked up.

Like building a business, you’re building yourself too.

Because when you start a business, every single insecurity you have will flare up.

Everything you’re worried about, every fear, every quirk, everything wrong with you will

come up and you have to face it.

Like it’s going to break you the fuck down because you’re meant to rebuild yourself.

And you have to rebuild yourself into the person who can build a business.

You’re not just building a business, you’re building yourself with it.

And when you lose your current life, you lose your current self too.

Because everything you face, every challenge you go through, it’s breaking down who you


This is a very painful thing to go through and it’s very disorienting and confusing and

scary as fuck.

And I can do a whole podcast episode about it.

But just remember me saying, your entire reality is going to break.

Who you are now has to break to get to where you want to get to.

That’s just the way it fucking goes.

So get prepared for a lot of uncomfortable shit.

And like I’ve said before in other episodes, commit to figuring it out and you will.

Don’t look for a way out, look for a way through.

You got it.

Okay, so our last talking point for this video is about how to know if you should start a

business or not.

And I’m going to tell you a couple things.

I’m not meaning to hurt your feelings.

I’m just telling you from someone who sees what it takes and does what it takes.

It’s like if you can’t even just do these couple of things, you ain’t ready for the

big shit of actually owning a business.

So if you can’t make yourself do the small shit, don’t start a business.

You don’t have what it takes.

If you need motivation to do basic little bullshit and daily tasks, don’t even fucking


Literally, it’s going to be too much and too overwhelming.

If you constantly rely on motivation and you can’t just be disciplined and fucking do what

needs to be done, give it up.

Go get a normal job.

That’s what they’re there for.

And the other thing is uncertainty.

You have to get very, very comfortable with living in uncertainty.

Nothing is guaranteed when you start your own business.

The way that society is set up is school, get a job.

Okay, you go to college, you get a degree, you go get a job and going to college guarantees

you you’re going to get that job because you get your little piece of paper, you get your

little degree.

That’s the safe route.

That’s the route with stability.

That’s the route with certainty.

There is no certainty.

There is no stability in creating your own business or starting anything on your fucking


You don’t know if it’s going to fucking work.

So if you’re not willing to choose into a life that is shaky for a while until you can

create that stability for yourself, don’t even bother.

That’s enough to break a lot of people.

And entrepreneurship and starting businesses is not for everyone.

Not everyone’s cut out for it.

So that’s what I’m saying.

Like if you have to go work a normal job, that’s totally fine.

You don’t have to do it.

Like that’s what makes the world go round.

And even if you have to go work a job while you’re starting your business so you still

feel a sense of stability and like you’re okay, you’re not like fully in fight or flight

mode every day like I fucking was.

That’s understandable too.

And I’m not talking down on you for any of that.

I’m just saying if you can’t make yourself just do the small shit, if you aren’t okay

with uncertainty, if you can’t manage your emotions, if you’re not okay with doing bitch

work, go experience more.

Don’t even entertain the idea of starting a business.

You need to go experience more things until you develop these skills to start the business

if that’s something that you want to do.

You’re not ready for it yet.

And like I said before, you can just jump into it like the ocean.

Like I was talking about with the kiddie pool in the ocean.

You can just go jump in the fucking ocean and figure it out.

It’s going to be a lot harder if you’re not disciplined.

So go do some shit to learn some discipline.

But you can figure it out.

You absolutely can.

I’m not doubting you.

You just got to make sure you are one stubborn motherfucker and you’re going to make it work

because it’s going to get bad.

And your head ain’t going to come up out of water for a long time.

You’re going to think you’re fucking drowning.

One thing people don’t talk about when they start their own businesses is how they constantly

are daydreaming about going back to a nine to five because that’s something I did for

a while.

I would always do when things got hard or I stressed out or things just got really difficult,

I would just think back to going to a certain like job like you get structure, you get stability,

you get routine, you get all of that.

You get a clear, definite work this amount of hours and you clock out when you have your

own business.

Ain’t no clock out, babe.


Put your seatbelt on because you’re going to fucking eat, breathe and sleep your business

or good luck.

A lot of people think nine to fives are more work.

Absolutely the fuck not.

Oh my God.

But my whole thing with saying you’re going to entertain the idea and you’re going to

consider going back to a nine to five when you’re thinking about going back to a nine

to five and it feels like relief.

Pay attention to what you’re feeling.

You’re feeling unstable.

You’re feeling uncertain.

You’re feeling overwhelmed.

You feel hopeless.

There’s a lot of things that you’re feeling if you’re dealing with your own business that

are going to cause you to entertain that thought.

It’s like my episode about missing people.

You’re not missing the job.

You don’t actually want that job.

You miss the way you feel inside it.

So your brain is just going to remember the last time you felt stable, consistent, secure,

all of that.

It’s going to make you think you missed that job.

It’s going to make you think you want a normal job again, but it’s not a normal job that

you want.

It’s to feel safe.

It’s to feel secure.

It’s to feel stable.

It’s to want a sense of routine.

It’s to feel like your actions are for something because in a business for a long time, you’re

going to be doing a lot of shit and a lot of bitch work when you see no results.

You see nothing.

There’s no ROI on it for a long time.

And when you are constantly exhausted by that, your brain’s automatically going to start

thinking back to it.

So I just want to give you this reassurance.

You don’t actually want a nine to five.

You want the feeling states that are in that.

So once you know the way that you want to feel, figure out a way to set that up in your


Even if it takes time, you can start doing things now that will make you feel more stable,

secure, consistent, all these things, less fearful.

You can set things up, but you just have to get clear on what it is you feel and what

you need to set up in your own life.

That’s also set up in a nine to five that gives you those feelings.

So I am officially done yelling at you.

This, like I said, was everything I wish someone would have slapped me upside the head

with before I started a business.

I didn’t mean to offend anybody if I did, but if you’re too weak and you’re like triggered

by this video, another sign you shouldn’t start a fucking business.

It’s harsh, bitch.

But I have a lot more tricks up my sleeves.

Bad time to use that.

But I hope this video was helpful.

Leave me a comment down below of what you thought.

And if you’re watching this on YouTube, leave me a thumbs up.

And if you’re listening to the audio version of Aware and Aggravated on Spotify and Apple

Podcasts, if you didn’t know, I have episode one through 40 that’s just audio version.

So episode 40 and on is video.

But if you’re listening to it, leave me a five stars.

All of my links to everything that you can keep up with me on, everything I’ve got is

all in the description.

If you want to download my app, Positive Focus, I just want to say thanks if you made it this


Hope you enjoyed the video, even though I yelled at you the whole time.

Everybody stay safe, take care of yourself, and I will talk to you next Sunday.