and gentlemen
very sorry for the late start here but
unfortunately i’m the only one that’s here
brian and eddie and ari
have not shown up yet brian’s not showing up because he
he was eating some yogurt
and he bit down on his
spoon and broke his fucking tooth
which is one of the dumbest fucking
things i’ve ever heard in my life
so he’s not gonna be here and
eddie stuck in traffic
because it’s raining
in la and when it rains in la everybody freaks out
and already
stuck in traffic as well
so that’s the
story let me
shut this music
off i got this
the guru from gangstar died yesterday very very sad
one of my favorite rap bands ever
um and dude was like forty three years old makes you
think that’s only a year
older than me that’s crazy shit you know
dying of you know cancer and shit
used to be healthy now he’s dead
and that’s life unfortunately but the good
thing is we still got his music
life carries on and maybe
maybe somewhere cool right now right
who the fuck knows right
ladies and gentlemen
so since i’m starting solo let’s get
started with a bunch of shit that’s going on
first of all this fucking
strike force thing you know
one of the reasons why
the strike force
thing is so fucked up is because they
haven’t really done it that many times
they haven’t done
these big cbs shows that many times and
they made a
bunch of big mistakes and the big brawl that happened
afterwards i mean
first of all everyone was
criticizing mayhem
and everyone
was saying that mayhem fucked up and mayhem
might cause
cbs their deal
all right first of all
mayhem shouldn’t have even been
allowed to get into that octagon if that was the ufc
they have security
at the stairs
they have security at the top
you can’t just walk into the octagon
while the fights are
going on it’s
literally not possible
you can’t have
that many teammates in the octagon as well
when jake shields
after his fight he had like
six or seven of his buddies
in the cage
trainers everybody you can’t have that many people
the ufc does not
allow the ufc
i believe you’re allowed to have three
and they regulate
it all and that’s what you’re supposed to do
as far as mayhem
doing something that was inappropriate
well he definitely did something disrespectful you know
jake shields
is in the middle of the biggest victory of his life
just beats dan
fucking henderson and dominates him for four
rounds after you got fucked up for the
first round so
you know it’s a huge emotional victory for him
and for his
teammates rather you know this is a gigantic
fight and he pulled it off so
you know emotions were running very high
and mayhem stepped
in and bogarted the attention and that’s not cool
but it was a mistake
you know he went in there to try to hype up the
fight the same way they
would do in the
ufc the same way
you know the
famous george st
pierre i’m not impressed with your performance
you know when he went in there when
matt hughes had just won
you know that kind of shit happens
to build up
fights that’s what it’s for
but this wasn’t planned
you know strike
force didn’t know it was
gonna happen
mayhem thought
about it last
minute he just
wanted a you know he was hyped up because he had won
earlier than
night he wanted a rematch with jake shields
so he runs into the octagon
and you know
they start pushing him out of the way
and then chaos
erupts he should have never
been allowed to get into the octagon and if he
was allowed to get in the cage
they should have had it
regulated it
should have been a situation
where when they
would let jake
shields speak
they ask him all the questions are
going to ask him
totally respectfully
he gets his chance
he gets his moment to say what he has to say
thank his teammates then
after all that’s done
then mayhem
comes in if that’s what they want if that’s a
fight they’re
hyping up next
who the fuck knows what
their plans were they
their plans
might not be a mayhem
fight next so it
should have been up to them a
they should have
they should have
regulated the cage
they should
have made sure he didn’t get in there as far as like
what the diaz brothers did and you know and
gilbert melendez
those guys are backing up
their buddy
all right those guys are like brothers you know
those guys they’re all a
bunch of fucking psychos and
savages their
buddy just wins the
strikeforce a bit away title
some pushing goes on
they’re down
to get in there that’s just the way they are and
you know i mean
the diaz brothers
you know people always criticize them but
i think first of all i
think they make shit way more interesting
when you’ve got someone like
nate and nick diaz that
they don’t give a fuck like
they really don’t give a fuck like they’re not just
pretending to
not give a fuck no they really don’t give a fuck
they will fight
in a brawl on cbs
on prime time they don’t give a fuck
they they really
knew what was
going on and they
still stepped in there and did that
you can’t just
have them all together like that
and let anybody
in that you want it’s like i used to have pit bulls
and when you get a
bunch of pit bulls in the room
you can’t get mad at the pit bulls if they
fight each other
that’s just what they do
and these guys are professional
mixed martial arts
fighters and
in mixed martial arts
definitely there’s a
psychological aspect to it that’s a huge component
of of of fighting
and whether or not you win or lose and
these guys have this
psychological edge over their
opponents because they’re so aggressive
because they’re so down to
fight at any moments
notice they don’t give a fuck they’re not afraid
they’re ready to throw down
and because of that that’s a significant advantage
it’s a significant tactic
when it comes to fighting
and they’re not
gonna relinquish
that just because they’re on national
television so
if someone gets in one of
their boys faces and disrespects them
they’re gonna
fight i mean that’s just what’s
gonna happen
so what i blame
is i think mayhem certainly made an
error but you
should have
never been allowed
to get into the position to make that
error it was
completely in my opinion on
strike force
or the the committee
or whoever the fuck is supposed to be
watching that cage
you know i don’t know who’s responsible for that
the ufc takes care of all that shit
i never have to
think about it
but whoever was responsible for that
it was a goddamn disaster so
that’s my opinion
on that and as far
as like the commentary goes and the people were talking
about how bad the commentary is
this is what i
think about that
i like frank shamrock i like frank
frank shamrock as a person
i enjoy him i
think he’s funny
i don’t mind his commentary at all
those other two dudes
it’s like my mom said if you don’t have not anything
nice to say don’t say anything at all so i’m not
gonna say shit
because i think
those guys need work
you know it’s not as easy as it looks and
you got to be a fan of the
sport and i’m not sure that
that main guy’s a fan of the sport
i don’t want to mention his fucking name so
here we are this is the the 420 episode of the podcast
and what we’ll do is
i’ll just ramble
until everybody gets here ari and
eddie should be here within
probably 15
to 20 minutes depending on what the traffic looks like
and when they get here
then we’ll jump off so between now and then i’ll just
take questions
if you see my office here if you notice
things have changed
i got rid of some
shit here move something out
and i’m gonna put a
green screen behind me so
for the next you
stream podcast
hopefully the next one if not the next one the one
after that i’ll be in space
so the way we’re gonna have it set up is
we’re gonna have a podcast and then
i’m gonna have a green screen i’m gonna have
a total space
background and
then i’ll have couches and shit like that so
the idea is that it’ll look like couches flying through
space and so that should be pretty interesting this
whole thing is you know i
started out this podcast sort of just
kind of as a move and
you know i just thought it’d be an interesting thing to
do i’d always wanted to do something like that i always
enjoyed radio
but i kind of
never got off my ass to do it and now i’ve done it
i think this is like the 12th or the 13th week in a row
so we’ve been
real consistent and it’s been a lot of fun and now it’s
number eight on the comedy section of itunes
which is crazy because the
audio part of it was just sort of an
afterthought to
throw that up
and the you
stream one is getting plenty of hits and
it’s been fun
a fun way to supplement you know comedy and
speaking of comedy i got
one gig this friday
night and sacramento but it’s already sold out
i’m gonna be doing a color commentary for
jose aldo versus
uriah faber
the i don’t think
they’re literally not even referring
to it as the wc they’re just referring to it as
aldo versus favor
i’m not exactly sure why that is i
think you know
it’s for you know because it’s
because the preliminary is
gonna be on
spike tv a lot
a lot of corporate shit
so that’s what’s going on um
i got a bunch of shit to talk about
first of all this fucking
volcano over iceland is nuts
if you haven’t noticed that there’s a
my wife had no idea what was going on
because she
doesn’t pay attention to shit except for gossip but
there’s a giant
volcano in iceland that literally is
erupting through
the ice it’s pretty badass if you look at some of the
video footage online if you google it
it’s really pretty intense
you seeing like molten lava
squirting up through the ice is really wild and
the volcanic ash
has gotten so bad that they have canceled
all the air flight
over europe
for days and days
oh our spheres here how’s it going
oh beautiful
sup brother
alright alright why is jelly for this place out i did
have a seat
alright ladies and gentlemen he’s here eddie bravo
should be moments behind i’m sure he’s very close
did you even ring the doorbell no
he didn’t i didn’t even hear it
not so much on rambling
we’re talking about
the iceland volcano
and you know
about all that show yeah no one can fly anywhere yeah
today they just lifted it
but i wouldn’t fucking fly lift it fully
yeah they lifted the air band
over europe but
that’s because it’s costing 200 million dollars a day
how nutty is that it’s supposed to be
good to enroll in
the airline industry
200 murders
of in this country is yeah
i know it’s awfully crazy
200 million dollars a day how about that
how fragile
is this world
and any little
thing can happen and
things close down for a couple days and
these businesses
they run so on the edge
that just a couple days off work and they come
close to being bankrupt
i like that people are like fucking
i heard all
the stories like this volcano now i can’t fly home
or like you know we
could have had all life
wiped out too
but that’s just as likely yeah
people have
no idea what volcanoes are all about
volcanoes have reshaped
this earth like
when you’re in hawaii
you ever gone to hawaii
you ever gone over the volcano in a helicopter
it’s the fucking coolest thing ever
i went to the big island and we took
a trip on a helicopter and we flew over the volcano
and you’re flying over this
active volcano
you’re watching
the lava bubble up inside you can see the fucking lava
you can see it and you can see it roll into the ocean
like we fly over to
where it rolls in the ocean
it’s moving four inches
every year closer to japan and
it’s fucking
crazy and there’s another island
there’s another island in the middle of the
ocean that hasn’t
quite popped up yet
but it’s on its way it’s
going to be the next island in the hawaiian islands
it’s on its way up it’s
building up
that whole area is just one gigantic
as the volcano
stuff comes out
it just dries and it dries
and it becomes
yeah it becomes rock and it
breaks down and it
breaks down and becomes dirt and
plants grow on it
of that kind of dirt yeah
i mean it literally is
that’s what hawaii is it’s a volcano
it just came out
of the ground and you know in created islands
but you can see the fucking volcano
and they have all
these different
photos that you
could buy there and
videos you could
watch there’s a
bunch of towns
that were completely
wiped out on the big island
where they’ll show you
where the town used to be
the lava just came rolling in like the 50s and just
crushed the entire town
i think it happened in the 80s i
went a few times a rock half
up i didn’t see any of that but i’m sure there must be
i mean most of the
stuff just gets smushed
i mean the lava comes down it just
literally annihilates
any evidence whatsoever than anything was there right
and what people don’t
realize is like that shit has happened so many times
you know this
world has changed
so many times just in you know
the last few million years
the best place to find megalodon
skeletons megalodon
teeth you know what a megalodon is
they’re these
giant ancient prehistoric
sharks they were like fucking
gigantic way bigger than
great whites
well the best
place to find
their teeth
is in montana
this i used to be
covered used to be the ocean yeah
how fucking that is
after they hung out
the ocean fucking
crazy montana
used to be underwater
you know so many parts of just
just like ten thousand years ago half of
north america was
under a mile high
sheet of ice
just ten thousand years ago
that’s nothing
that’s nothing ten
thousand years is nothing
ten thousand years ago they were
saber tooth
tigers and woolly mammoths did you know that
just 10 000 years ago
fucking saber
tooth tigers
10 000 years isn’t shit
like there were people around then
what was the 10 000
years before that it was there
we don’t know
10 000 years before that i mean as
far as human
it’s all who the fuck knows i mean we know that
the big extinction was
65 million years ago
that was the one that hit the yucatan the big
meteor that
wiped out supposedly
wiped out everything except
small mammals and you
know anything
bigger than like
a fucking hamster was
a small mammal
skill why were they
they figured
out a way to burrow on
the ground and hardy rats and shit like that you know
rats are some hardy animals
and we’re like
the descendants of anything that survived
65 million years old
tons of rats
yeah well all sorts of mammals
and some birds i mean
dinosaurs are
a direct descendant
of dinosaurs
somehow or another some birds survived but
literally most of the life on the planet was
wiped the fuck out
and then there’s the
super volcanoes man
super volcanoes have been wiping out
things on this continent for
millions and millions of years
every six to
eight hundred thousand years
yellowstone blows up and
literally wipes out the
whole continent
kills everything
and it restarts
again yeah and there’s been
2 000 earthquakes in yellowstone national park
since january this year
let’s hear this
thing on npr
about earthquakes and how they’re
swimming more now
you know yeah is that true there are more
no no exactly the same just happened to hit big cities
really yeah
so there’s the same amount
it’s just they’re hitting
places where people are yeah and if it happens
i mean if you had a
birthmark in
bakerscale you’re
gonna get so much damage
if you get it on the corner of
sunset and fairfax it’s
gonna be you know tremendous
right right
right you know
but it seems like
there’s so many of them they’re having yeah it does
seem like a
lot is that because of the news like there’s
more access to information down
there before i don’t know they were
saying like last year was the year of celebrity death
you know was it
yeah it was it’s
never had before
but it just keeps happening more celebrities just
last year who died last year
jackson that
chick that was hot
was the choice angels
farrah fawce that’s your legacy
that chick that was hot charlie’s
oh yeah did he die last year or this year
billy mays billy mays
south park did that episode
about the year of celebrity
death oh did they
yeah but they were already talking about it
opening i think was talking
about it a bunch it was like all these celebrities are
dying but it’s not it’s just
i think it’s just
tmz makes multiple celebrities
that’s true
you know there’s way more celebrities down there before
yeah do you know gangsta
the rap band gangsta
guru from gangsta just died
you don’t give a fuck dude
i just barely existed
i already knew is
that you never
heard a gangster
there’s some
sing with their songs you don’t sing around
rap one of those stories i’ll play you one
how dare you
sing a ditty from guru what a great christian is
that was nice they were good
jack stars this might be a little too loud
they were one of the best like lyrical bands the 90s
the 90s they were more popular and he died last night
apparently had cancer
and then he had a
heart attack and then just died succumb to the cancer
forty three fucking years old dude
that’s like me
forty two i’m almost probably forty three an artist
dudes are dying of like natural causes
type yeah they’re not even the weirdest thing
not get hit by me here you fucking died
you should just gave us
broken leg all those stuff man
so it’s over son i’ve got
he was not seen in a true romance where he’s like your
nigga your descendants and civilians
not yeah so
it’s christopher walken and then the other guy
the old
you people know who the fuck you’re talking about
the guy from was was he in apocalypse now
remember that movie that was awesome water world
the lead bad guy yes offer thank you very much
jesus christ he’s under a hundred pounds now
wow so if he was a chick he’d be hot
yeah that’s
the prior side of life
is that the weirdest fucking
thing in the world is these women that think that being
super skinny like anorexic is hot
that shit is disgusting
some people like it they must
how could the fuck
could any guy like that that’s so
anti nature
nature you want a woman to have some fat on her ass
you want to have big tits so she can milk the baby
you want to have
fat on her ass so she can survive through the pregnancy
those are all like
these are like
those things
yeah but those
things that
they are good
but that’s why
those things are there the reason
why they’re attractive
yeah the reason why they’re
attractive it’s i mean
why aren’t you just
because that’s too much that’s obese that’s unhealthy
but a little bit
of fat is good like a little fat ass i like a fat ass
what else was on
obese just like
that’s not good because they can’t move around good
you want athletic
but you want some fat on them that’s what it is
it’s all nature it’s all leftover shit
i mean think
about how easy it is to
trick your system how
about fake tits
we know they’re fake we know there’s a bag of plastic
underneath your skin but
still it makes you hot
it looks hotter
they poke out and they look
ridiculous like
that that poor
fucking girl what is her name heidi montag
you know who she is really
yeah you know he
doesn’t pay attention he’s the anti gossip man
but this heidi montag chick
is she’s one of
those celebrities
for just being
a celebrity like you’re not exactly sure why she’s
a celebrity
she just had 10 plastic
surgeries all together
she had her chin done
her tits done she had all this shit so she
look better or worse
some people say she looks better but i didn’t
think she looked bad to
begin with she just
had kind of a big chin like sort of like a jay leno
thing going on
but she was pretty
like you like she didn’t have to do that like it
doesn’t make you look better
it just makes you look different
definitely sluggier
she had big
tits to begin with she had
like big fake
tits and she got giant ones
now they’re like
ridiculous like they look stupid
i like a solid see
solid sees good right
it’s amazing
i don’t even
crazy crazy big
yeah when you see girls who have it’s so funny like la
so fucked up with fake
tits that you see girls got real tits
yeah and they’re kind of like sacking shit
what’s with those what’s wrong with those
meanwhile it’s just like that’s normal let it go
yeah like go look at fucking videos of africa you
you’re not supposed to have
these missile tits that
stick straight out of your chest that’s
just not normal i
think it’ll realize when i go from like a bee to a sea
hang down a little bit
they just look like perky
they just look like they did maybe when
they were 20
it’s amazing though how easy it is to trick us
some plastic surgery is good
do we need more of those people
you know it’s like
you’ve got the right plastic surgery
right you look great
to me more is forty seven years old and she
still looks hot how the fuck is she doing that
i saw that that’s incredible the
model with the book there
yeah i’m sure but it’s like no way not that much
that’s our in person
she was at ufc maybe two years ago
she’s kind of
forty seven forty eight
she’s hot as fuck dude
still no i’m sure the vagina is just dumb
i’m sure it’s just dry as fuck
yeah there’s no more blood coming out of that thing
there’s no more periods
50 when you hit 50 that’s a wrap why on periods
there’s no more periods that means you’re not
ovulating means you’re not really able to have bird
babies anymore
your body shuts the fuck off
you’re just shooting loads into a cemetery
and shooting those into a casket
there’s nothing in there
it’s a total trick
you might as well be fucking a rubber doll
i mean you’re having sex with a person that’s all well
and good but as far as like you
shoot a load inside of her it’s a
total waste of time but at least it’s not yeah
we don’t want
babies i know you don’t want babies i’m not saying that
you do but i’m saying like for nature though it’s like
i mean the only reason why sex feels good is to
trick you into fucking so that you make people let
me tell you what the jewish mystical
about what happened to your
semen that you wasted no
when you pull out or when you masturbate
your semen is said to have
some demon woman
it’s like they’re like appearing
right here she’s fucking you as you masturbate it
so you get her pregnancy
and when you get to heaven
or before you get to heaven it’s purgatory level
you have to face all of your kids and they’re like why
why couldn’t we be born real people
and they’re all like
formed and mangled and you have to answer all of them
oh my god that
might be the
greatest story ever how come i’ve never
heard of it before i don’t know how much kamala
do you study
this so this they
taught you this when you were a
child now the people that don’t know
ari spent a
bunch of years
in his youth as a seriously religious man
like read the torah how many
hours a day
when i was in israel public
i don’t know
ten twelve hours a day
reading the torah
we’re gonna have to fire up the volcano for that son
this is great man you really
oh dude i’m turning this bitch into a real studio
dude i did a solo it took
me like yeah took me like twelve hours
well i did have people help me get rid of the dust
ladies and gentlemen have you ever heard of a volcano
do you know what a volcano is
a volcano is
a vaporizing
device and what
vaporizing is
the big argument about thc
about marijuana in general is that you shouldn’t
smoke because
smoke is bad for your lungs
but you don’t have to smoke it
you can eat it
but eating it is very
tricky because you eat it you get too fucked
up because when you eat it it’s processed by the liver
and it creates something called 11 hydroxy metabolite
which is four times more psychoactive
than thc and it’s really a totally different experience
you know that’s why when people eat
brownies they
freak out that’s why
you know i’m sure a lot of you have seen that video
where that dude
he’s a cop and he calls up
the nine one one
and says that he
thinks he’s
dying because
because he and his
girlfriend ate some pot
brownies and he said time was moving really slow and
he thinks he’s dying
well that’s because oh
eddie bravos here
ladies and gentlemen oh
check out the office
you clean this
motherfucker dude
i got rid of the desk and i’m turning to sing into a
studio we’re live
right now there’s over 2 000 people this is the biggest
crowd we’ve ever had anyway
that’s a vaporizers
and vaporizer
ladies and gentlemen
it blows into this plastic bag and it looks like
like a like a you know
like saran wrap or some shit
and you just get pure thc vapor
and what it does is it heats up the little crystals
on the thc and releases them and it comes out like mist
so there’s no
smoke at all so there’s no argument anymore there’s no
negative health
effects that’s my
i said smoke out of a vapor
so i’m gonna have
two dedicated cameras in here and this
is gonna be a green
screen and we’re gonna be in space
when i set this up within two weeks
this will all be
green behind us and then when we’re
watching it’ll
be like we’re flying to the universe on a couch
it’s gonna be the shit
every episode is a different paris
yeah yeah sometimes
they were in africa
for real so
what we were talking
about we went over volcanoes
we went over i went over
strike force
i don’t know if you got any opinion on
strike force i said the
whole reason why that brawl took place
is because they didn’t
they didn’t
guard the caves they didn’t
do a good job of making sure that nobody got in there
that was well
as soon as i
saw the fight end i was like
i want to go to a spot
the spice done it’s over i
never won well
and watch mayhem went in there and talked when jake
shields was
in the cage and said yo jake when do i get the rematch
gilbert melendez
pushed mayhem out of the way
the diaz brothers jumped mayhem jumped him
man pushed oh jumped him it was a brawl
dude it was
kicking him
when he was down there was like four people on him
eric apple took jake
shields and
got him out of there and pushed him over to the
other side so he can get involved in the bra
i mean it was a fucking
bench clearing brawl
that was pretty awesome there was
a great picture
there’s a great
picture online
where someone
from the audience captured it on the
phone or something
where jake shields and nick diaz are coming
it’s like from behind
jake or behind man
yeah it’s a
great shot that
was that yeah
yeah mayhem is
standing there and nick diaz is like this and jake
shields is like that and gilbert melendez
is on the other side
look man those fucking dudes they have a lot of
unity and i respect that and you know
and everybody’s like oh they’re thugs and they’re this
mad well you
gotta realize man
these dudes are fucking professional cage
fighters alright
they’re in there
scrapping with each
other every day
they’re down to die for each
other the reputation is hugely important they’re not
gonna fucking back down they’re not
gonna have a situation
where they look like a
bitch they’re not gonna
allow someone to
think in them
to anybody who
think that their
buddy got disrespected but they didn’t do anything
about it that’s not
gonna happen
so any sort of a situation like that
where a brawl takes
place i’m playing fucking
strike force man
i blame strike force for
allowing that to get to that position
allowing those fucking dudes to get into the cage
those were all the
comics for our last
thing really yeah
there was some
definitely people
that have who i’m scared of
they asked me to
leave and lit up as far as the
front patio
and el dorado
were scared
so we’re like
just call the cops and get them out of here
but they wouldn’t do it eventually the
fight broke out
and somebody like are you let’s go to the
front i saw the
fight and i’m like
i don’t want to get involved in this i don’t get
stabbed for someone else
that you see already
let’s go fight
looks like everybody like
come on come to the
front defend everybody are
they looking at
you is the enforcer
now because
seriously come on
they’re not
no but there’s gotta be some guys
where i go so how long you been doing
did you choke me out there’s probably one or
two oh shit
you might be the baddest motherfucker in the comments
did you hear what gus johnson said
do you hear what
gus johnson said
somebody no this hasn’t been confirmed
but i’m just gonna say it because i hope it’s true
gus johnson who’s the guy who’s the the
black dude who does the commentary
strike force
made a bunch of errors called like arm bars
come or i saw that i was like yeah this see this
ladies and gentlemen see the fog in that that’s missed
well anyway this reporter called them up and asked him
about it i think
mike russell i believe
was his name
and he said
listen dog i know the difference between our bar comola
kimora i train
he said if you want to come
down and roll with me i’ll show you the difference like
he’s like challenging guys to roll with him like he
trains like
gus johnson on the internet yes
people do with mike russell
no it’s too far away we can pull this
but if we put close to the problem as
there’s three of us here
can’t read it we can’t
read it yeah we don’t have to read it we get just talk
we got to pay attention to
the audience
yeah but you can’t
pay attention to the audience and keep a conversation
going at the same time sometimes
yeah it’s not really harsh in your lungs at all
that’s just like a mist you know be great if like
if the da busted in right now
we’re all legal
we have prescription yeah we’re legal i’m sick
insomnia bitch
so i’m gonna
crank this back up and i’ll fill the bag up
again oh no we go one more time son i
think seriously
though seriously because this is the 420 episode
we should be allowed to have like
order pizza
and like have
food and shit
during the show
it’s four twenty we’re getting high
like snacking on shit
yeah but that
fucks up with the that fucks up the conversation no you
never had a
great conversation and eating
pizza but yeah but people are
watching this
conversation this conversations like a show
but i’m talking
about how i’m hungry
i’m starving
i was gonna go to the
fast food joint but
why don’t you just go walk into my
kitchen and just go scrounge around
we got a show to do son but we need to
order pizza we’ll order
pizza later
we’ll order some pizza later
the idea will be the
pizza comes right before we kill this thing okay
how dare you motherfuckers so well
i was telling us something hilarious
listen to this shit stop
it off we need to be focusing on the show son
i was telling us that there’s
an ancient jewish whatever the fuck it is
jewish mythical thought
there’s a when you wait see
the wait see
uh huh so um
they say when you pull out and you
masturbate you’re
not really masturbating you’re fucking a
demon woman
with nothing just like a
ghost and when you go to heaven
when you go to a
the afterlife you face all your kids that
would have been born in the real life
instead of born this
demon woman well
like like this like why
why did you
pull out we want to be born real little boys
that’s hilarious
i can’t wait to die there’s gonna be all my kids
i thought i didn’t have any kids man
i don’t feel so bad now dude you’ve got a billion
you’ve got a billion monster babies
i think it’s per load
i don’t know
they don’t cut sperm so yeah you’re like fucking one
demon i think so how many demons do you think you got
damn it
i’m gonna have a much more efficient
setup here as well ladies and gentlemen
when we get back
no how many demons
i think on average
six a week five weeks since i was
you shoot six loads a week
sometimes more than one does
in a month you ever feel like a
loser when you get more than one again
no i feel like i’m alive my dick
works that’s what i feel like yeah like yeah
still working for this
i always feel like
if i jerk off
more than once a day that i’m just obsessed
yeah three times a day
is bad that’s bad obviously i’m not horny
you know already jerked off
i know but why why just sit there
like a little monkey at the zoo
yeah no in the wild you fucking
you know you’d be badass
spreading spreading your seed
ready to see you jerking off into a napkin
but if there was vagina then
if there was a vagina
david no one’s ever said no i’d rather just jerk off
and how crazy
is that you’re insist
that someone’s telling
you that masturbation is so bad that you’re fucking
that’s the worst case scenario
you’re having
sex with a demon and making half demon
babies that are
gonna be waiting for you when you die
to scream and yell at you yeah
that is because the institution of marriage
they want that that helps religion
they want people making units and
then breathing
it’s amazing though
like what why do they give a fuck
i don’t know
why do they give a fuck if you masturbate what is it
about masturbation
about no masturbation
you know that somehow or another
equates to them having more control over you well
the more you don’t masturbate the more you want to fuck
right so they can fuck women
and you may
have babies
the results of
babies so the more you masturbate the less babies
right so that’s got to be exactly why
the catholic church
doesn’t want you having
birth control too right
does that make
sense yeah well it’s
definitely way
easier to control
someone when they have kids i feel that myself
i feel like i’m easier to control
now that you have kids when you have kids when you want
everything to be nice
you know you want
everything to be easy
i don’t want any
drama you know
but man the idea of
demon babies you’re fucking a
demon no they came up with the
worst story ever
you’re fucking a
demon and you make babies
that are half
demon and they’re
waiting for you when you die what the fuck man
missed those stuff
it’s like why
stops because you
by the time you figure that
out you’ve already jerked off like a thousand times
like it’s 50 000
demons 50 000
demons i’m fucked either way
might as well
enjoy this life you’re facing an army of demons who
cares there’s
gotta be something you
could do to
cancel out the other
demons to make up for
a good point
there’s got to be is there another
thing you know i didn’t mention
that like what if you let a
great lie had 12
babies you know
with your wife
but masturbated
three times you get to heaven you have
three little
demon babies you’re
still gonna
the whole lives
like tasks you can do on
earth that cancel out your
demon babies
there’s gotta be you
gotta look into
it’s gotta be because
what about people
that are trying to convert into this religion
and like i would but god damn if i do that
the jews don’t give a fuck i already got 75 000
jews yeah those
recruiting religion
ever they don’t give a fuck we try to convince
you not to do it yeah they make it really hard to
do it also the jewish thing yeah
it’s like a regular do this thing
i never heard of this before
you remember
when david was a king the juke so
powerful that they wouldn’t allow any conversions
wow they’re like no one’s doing it for the
right reasons we can’t risk it
that’s deep yeah
and you guys
what do you guys
think of jesus
they think that he was a real person
okay that spoke
about things he
was a sort of
a wise man but they effective went off the deep end
so they looked down on christianity for
choosing jesus as
their savior
and lord yes they
would say that no no that’s not the right
guy to choose
it’s so funny how they’re all sort of kind of connected
like judaism is
sort of kind of connected with christianity
it’s like that’s why the
all the really conservative
fundamentalist christians wanted to control israel
and support israel
they believe in the rapture
and they believe
that you know when the shit goes down that’s the
place to be
like you have
to protect them but they believe that they’re wrong
even though the
bible says that they’re the chosen people
the christians to go yeah but you guys got the
story all fucked up we got it
right and and don’t and don’t
it’d be an awesome
thing for the jews if it came out
the jesus actually never existed
wouldn’t be like dude you guys he never even existed
you know what i mean that would
crush the christian well what
proof do they have that jesus
existed historical
documents well i looked online man and
apparently that’s very much in debate
very much in debate yeah there’s a lot
of scholars that do not believe he was an actual person
there’s a lot muslims
islams believe that jesus
existed but just was a man
the jews believe that
jesus existed and he was mad
and it would
it would benefit
their cost because they
would kill each
other they’d
slice each other
if you weren’t
their religion
i believe that they
would the former rap
the great revised
would talk about who he was
jesus see that’s what
my thing is
that makes me
think that he
even though there isn’t that much
proof that he actually wants to
laugh there’s a lot of holes and i want dvd
the god that
never was all that shit
you how could
how come the jews in the
muslims don’t jump on that
jesus christ
never existed
why don’t they
yeah exactly so that makes me
think damn he probably was a man who was a bad
motherfucker who knows who
knows what it
sounds like but the issue is
if the guy existed
for sure he didn’t walk on
water and come back from the dead yeah
that was like that was like
like someone thinking bruce lee
could really beat up 50 people
you know what i mean like
bruce lee the real god
and bruce lee the superstar
two different fucking people but it’s
hilarious how many people banked their life on some
story that would not make any fucking
sense if you told it today
like if you told that
story today
and said there was a dude who walked on
water and came back from dead everybody
would go just shut the fuck up that’s ridiculous
but because it’s 2 000 years ago everybody’s like whoa
that shit could really happen isn’t that
nuts like anything
like rational people that you talked to that would
there was a guy that we were doing fear factor who
we did a the family fear factor we came to people’s
houses and made him do things
you know we
traveled all across the country this dude was a
teacher he was a fucking math teacher
and he was telling me like
that jesus existed
because you can
prove it because
they’ve looked at molecules
that are too complex to have just
occurred naturally
this is a super that’s a ridiculous argument
here and this is
super super smart guy
and i was listening to him talk you know supposedly
super smart guy
and i was listening to this guy
talking like how nutty is that
but this guy can’t see
that he believes in some
also that’s not the reason you can say anything
existent because something was too amazing to
exist naturally
like millions
and millions
of faces that does not
she sees somebody draw a
picture of jesus
with the captures
of this is jesus
right but you can
never say that nothing can
exist naturally you don’t know the power of nature
nature is absolutely ridiculous
completely unpredictable there’s subatomic particles
that blink in and out of
existence all the time they appear
in two places at once this is science
real shit we know that
exists in nature
the whole pattern of nature is
gigantic the fibonacci
sequence that you see in pine cones
and pineapples and all sorts of different
plants and it exists in
human facial features and
this is like a mathematical code
to all this stuff
it doesn’t mean that there’s a fucking dude
pressing the button
it might mean that the whole
thing is just
super complicated and conscious
what do they do
pressing the button
there’s a god
we want to break it down to someone like us
want to like make a
super version of us
that’s running well yeah you’re talking
about that the old man with the beard in the sky
but jesus on
everything everything
every oh no for sure
of course that
of course of
course of course
no no of course but
it sounded like you were saying
that you were describing
how wonderful the universe is
in the fibonacci
series and how it’s all like this
code and structure
the greatest why
did there have
to be a god doing
that like to me i was like that there is an intelligent
other side that is way too complex for us to
understand it
well it’s what i don’t
think it is i mean it
could be that
everything has an intelligence
about it what i don’t
think it is is
a single entity
i think it’s much more likely that the
whole of course
it’s an interconnected
thing we totally agree
like an ocean
the ocean and then we’re like little
water molecules
the ocean it’s all exactly and that’s what
experiences feel like it feels like you’re in the
ocean sometimes it feels like you’re all connected
all around you to something that you don’t see ordinary
those mushrooms
i never told you
i did them by myself
on a fucking
thursday night i
decided a party by myself
yeah then i took all
those fucking mushrooms i got
pictures and
everything and um
how many the
whole thing
double that wasn’t five grams
no not five
grams it wasn’t five i’ve done five
grams before that was like
three and a half
okay so i did them all myself
and just want to let you know it
was it was pretty fucking insane
it was insane
but not as intense
as it would have been it at five
frames it was pretty intense but the five
grams like dm
five grams really is that threshold point
boom that was
about a year and a half ago when i did the five
grams of fucking
i was at a zoo
and i just woke up in the zoo
i thought doing mushrooms at the zoo
would be fucking awesome
you know what i
mean outdoors you
get mushrooms go out of nature zoo
but that is like anti nature
fuck i freak the fuck out how
to get the fuck out
you were watching their sorrow
oh yeah for sure right we just had to get the fuck out
jesus christ
super negative man i feel terrible when i go
i do not like it at all it makes me feel bad
i used to enjoy it because i used to
enjoy staring at the animals
but then one time i went high
i went one time when i was super baked what i did
what i did when i was super baked
i i got really i felt terrible i got really sad
i thought it was
you know the terrible terrible
thing that they were doing was just
taking these animals and shoving them into
these cages
and they don’t even get to do it and they just pace
you got a polar bear at the la zoo
they’ll just pace back and forth by that back door
just waiting for that fucking back
white door it’s like
fake eyes in a white door
right there by white door
that’s crazy
yeah that’s horrible man
i freak the fuck out
went out to the parking lot and
this chick i was with me we did the exact same thing
and we saw the exact same shit
we looked at the mountain
we would stop in the middle of the parking lot because
everything was connected it was all connected
but look at the sky
it’s like this guy would dance before and like
aztec writing
we look at the mountains in the distance like
miles away like pasadena mountains
and all this like
aztec pattern they’re forming the
aztec pattern isn’t that interesting and i was
like are you seeing when you look at the mountains
what do you see it’s like
the aztec patterns
dance then look at the sky the clouds the clouds are
in their spot for a second and then they form
and i remember
connor tell me because connor is the one who
turned me on to the dude who had him
he said the same
goes dude the
clouds gonna
dance for you
wow i didn’t even pay attention to that really
until it was actually happening
we get in the fucking car you’re like okay cool i
swear to god i was driving on the freeway
freaking out i didn’t
know if there was cars next to me on the side of me
but it really did look like
as i was driving on the freeway like
like i was in
like i was in
what dreams may come remember that shit
i was driving on the freeway
and it was like rose petals and
like bushes
would form in
front of my car i’m driving really rose
petals and bushes whoa
it was fucking insane
that by the way we don’t want
to encourage
i just wanted to get home
no i was just trying to get home
all i wanted
exactly all i wanted to do is get home
get in my little fucking dark room
i just close my eyes and
enjoy that light show
cause that light show was fucking
insane the twirling beauty of
you just can’t even
explain it it’s just fucking
that’s all i want to say
i want to see why do you
think that you see certain like religious
symbolism and like
hindu shit and buddhas
that’s where they got it from
you think that’s
where they got it from
yeah must be right
we’ve been doing mushrooms
since the dawn of time
of course that
when i looked at him like that’s
where all this shit comes from
all that alex gray shit
he’s telling you that’s
where it’s coming from well alex gray
is but these old cut like
like you know
those things that i have in my
office of the garuda
those birds
you know those you know i’m talking
about in the media room
they’re these
crazy psychedelic birds
and when i did dmt ones
i saw those
things i saw
that imagery
and then when i went to a
store and saw them for sale i’m like
oh my god whoever
created that
thing was there
they had to have seen that you
could see that first
well why is that
i don’t know
is that or i mean is it something that’s already there
we just can’t tune into it
until we take
or is it the same
hallucination happens to
every person takes a drug
i think i mean is that possible
i don’t know
i think that
it’s just it opens up your
senses somehow to this
other dimension and all
these dimensions that are all around us
and right like we’re in a radio
and we’re only
tuned in to 97
point one we
got an infinite number of stations we’re just
going to another station
that’s possible to what was that i
think it just fucks with the
brain makes it
make see things
weird possible
i don’t i don’t personally
think i don’t
think that i don’t
think the shit that i’m seeing
i don’t know
what you’re seeing but the shit that i’m seeing
five grams i don’t know if you’ve done five grams
but the shit you
say when you do five
grams is for me
who knows it seems
impossible for me to
dream that up in my
brain like it’s just the most
beautifully constructed flowing
shapes of nothing
random and you know when you’re not high you
close your eyes you see like
random blackness and there’s no pattern this is like
you might see
lit or tight
flashes of light
but when you
close your eyes on mushroom
all of a sudden
there’s a show
that’s about a thousand times
more complex than that visualizer you got on itunes
and that’s pretty fucking cool
visualize pretty cool
it’s in that same
thing but a thousand times more complex
way more complex
and i’m like
i’m not making
i’m not designing this i’m not controlling this
there’s someone
else controlling this someone else is making this shit
not me it seems like that’s
definitely one option but another option
is that that
stuff super charges your perceptions
and just makes your
imagination more hypersensitive and it makes your
visualizations go wild
because it reacts with you know also
the parasite
eyes that you use to see
things this is parasite
it lives in the sewers and it only feeds on cats brains
so what it does is it’s like a worm right
yeah but it lets
rats eat them
and then it burrows
into their brain and the only
thing that changes the rats and
change any behavior at all
except it takes
their way their fear of cats
so they will get
eaten by a cat
everything else is saying they eat
and breathe and do
everything when they
say what’s up
nothing major
cat kills it goes into the
yeah that’s incredible
and that’s his
brains i know it’s totally
fine we talked
about this one on the show the
other one that they do
where there’s a worm that gets inside a grasshopper
it convinces the grasshopper to commit suicide
so that it can
hatch out of its body
it grows into the
and teaches the grasshopper to jump into the
water and kill itself
it’s an aquatic worm
so it has to be hatched in the fucking
water how nutty
are things like that
that’s just crazy
that’s just like
existing on a
whole new level of yeah
like this that
alone right there
is so fucking amazing
it’s so amazing
it’s just another like
you know there’s
something going on dude i just
think something’s
going on i think well there’s
definitely something
going on but i
think our idea that our
culture is based on
is just that we want it to be
close to us
we want it to be like a
super version of us
which is like what a god is
it’s like a
super version of a human
but you know with all
these rules and god is you know
fucking kind of vindictive
and gets pissed at you if you fuck up
and you know a lot of
religions will kill you if you don’t listen to them
you know we want it like a
super virgin
plus but it’s much more possible that this whole
thing is just
connected to something that you can’t stop
you know some big
powerful thing
that feeds off itself
everything in this world
has a role and plays a part in this thing
it’s just we’re used to it
we don’t realize how nutty
it really fucking is because we’re used to it
because it’s just a normal part of our day
and people get used to anything
people in africa have
giant plates they
stick in their lips
and all the girls do it
and they’re used to it we just get used to
stupid shit
and once we’re used to something then
everything becomes fine
and then we
think that there’s some sort of a
grand order to
things you know
it’s really
getting weirder and
weirder as i got
older as i get
older and i look at
our culture and i
look at life on this planet i look at my own mortality
you know the fact that i’m like
you know the next half of my life is
gonna be the half of my life
where my body
doesn’t work good
you know that’s just the way it is just
getting close to dying
you know you’re
gonna have health issues if you don’t
watch your diet you know
you have to make sure you get the proper
sleep or you
might get heart attacks and shit like
things start
going wrong
when you really
start assessing this whole big
picture of what this really is like
god it’s like i
feel like i’ve been flying without a manual for so long
like just operating my life
not really having
any idea how to do it correctly just fucking up
learning from my fuck ups
starting from scratch
i feel like there’s got to be a way better way to
learn life than the way we do it
she’s like by the time you get christian
by the time you can get yourself
your own personality figured out
and your own the way you interact with people
figuring out
by the time you get that figured out it’s like
god you’re already
dying every guy
every guy has an
age they think oh
if i know what i do now and i go back to
that age i get laid so much oh god yeah
you look like you were 30 for like 30 years
yeah let me figure
that shit i knew i
was like 19 i knew right now
maybe better
maybe more advancements in skincare for men
it seems like we’re not
supposed to live long enough to figure this out
it seems like
the reason why turtles live to be 1 000 years old
are people in
life to be 100
is because we’re not supposed to
it would turn
into a thousand years yeah
there’s some tortoises no way
i watch discovery all the fucking time
was that a national geographic
god damn it
that was like today right now
god damn a thousand years old
damn so they
literally lived like back when people were writing
you know like
fucking what was the thousand year old writing they
should put like little black boxes on the time like
write everything out on paper yeah
a thousand years ago they
might have been doing it on animal skins to a lot
you know that’s crazy you know like the dead sea
scrolls that shit was all written on animal skins
those motherfuckers didn’t even know
paper they didn’t even have paper back there
could be a dead sea squirrel on a fucking turtle right
i wish i knew for sure who’s telling the
truth about the dead sea squirrels
because i don’t have enough time to
learn ancient hebrew
or what is it aromantic
and go back and read the dead sea
scrolls and decipher it for myself
but there’s all this dispute on what the dead sea
scrolls actually mean
and some people say that it contains
all kinds of nutty shit like fucking ufos and flying
saucers and
i mean there’s guys who have deciphered from dead sea
scrolls like the john marco
leggo guy says it’s all
about mushrooms he said
all it was about was them eating the ammonium
scaring mushroom
and fertility rituals and he
breaks it all down like
the origins of the words but
people argue
against him and
i don’t know if who’s
right it’s too
common they
should have a fucking live
thing on abc
where they all all
the best scientists on the planet all the best language
they get together
that should be important
let’s disciple
the shit in
front of the world
live satellite feed from fucking friends
the guy who
wrote that book but
he was the one of the head guys
the sidekick and dead sea scrolls
he worked on it
for 14 years and he was the only agnostic in the group
you know they had a
bunch of people that were ordained ministers and
they were the deciphers they were all religious people
and he started out a religious person but when he
started studying theology
he realized somewhere
along the line this is
obviously bullshit
and he just became agnostic
so he looked at the
whole picture
completely different than all the
other guys they all
refuted his findings
but there’s a lot of people that say he’s
right a lot
of people that say that he was the head scholar
he was the number
one dude and he was the guy who had it all right
he was the guy who was looking at it objectively
and everybody else was looking at it with a religious
slam this fucking guy
thinks it was all
about mushrooms
it was all about
psychedelic mushrooms that
they would hide
these mushrooms from the
romans and they
would hide what the
magic and what the mushrooms can do
and the way they hid it from them was in stories
and they didn’t even
write it down for
like a thousand years they just told each other as a
story for a thousand years
so it just became all fucked up
and so he breaks down
like ancient words
he broke down the word christ
brought it back to an ancient
sumerian word that means a mushroom
covered in god semen
because when
they thought it was raining it thought god was coming
on the earth
that’s why things
would come up on the
earth like come wasn’t bad to them
so like when god
would reign
and he was coming on the earth
these mushrooms
would just appear because they didn’t have
they didn’t know what
a spore is they couldn’t see
things so they didn’t see any seed or anything and also
these big mushrooms appear
like the next day
they grow quick
and then they
start eating them and they trip
their fucking
balls out they don’t want anybody else to know
about this so they
tried to hide this information they were told oh they
were keeping it from
their enemies
wow isn’t that nuts god jerk it off
that’s how they
used to look at it or did he pull out of
some goddesses
he came somehow dude you gotta think of this
like daddy you gotta think
if it feels so good to have a baby
right now think about how good it feels to have a baby
right now it’s an amazing incredible feeling
but most babies now they live
they live to be grown ups they go to be
adults they
think you don’t have to worry about them getting
eaten by lions you don’t have to worry about plague
but the people
that live back then have the same love for their kids
as we do now
but they couldn’t help it
so there were
people were
dying left and
right there’s nothing you can do to stop it
that must have been nuts man
that must have been fucking horrifying
to have kids have just
died well that’s
why they had all
these rituals
it was like fertility rituals are so important
they want to have as many kids as possible
they wanted
to tell we’re
in ovulation
roman times 50
lots of people die
after kids god damn
before what
what is the
it’s probably like
adulthood i
guess that’s don’t
make sense like
only half of them make it
to adulthood
oh god it’s so fucked up
imagine what it was
like that was on discovery
so i don’t know the history channel
don’t quote me on that
oh no that makes
sense i remember that look it’s
even if it wasn’t
fifty percent
it had to be a high number i mean they just
you guys can someone
check that mortality rate and
roman times
over that shit
so i think it’s
fifty percent
could be wrong
dude i’ve had two
major surgeries
both my knees reconstructed
both acl’s and one
more minor surgery my menescus surgery on my knee
but if i lived
you know a thousand
years ago i’d be fucked man i’d be fucked you
wouldn’t be doing
jiu jitsu no i
wouldn’t have to
we wouldn’t have been playing
by a small step by a school
do it working you
learn to been a softball champion
softball i smash my knees
there’s guys out there they’re fucking
champions of softball
like they’re the fucking
mark mcguire of softball
there’s guys out there will do this that crazy
who is the hicks and gracie
of softball we need to find that out
hicks and gracie of softball
how accurate can you be when you whip that fucking
thing around they are that looks dope that’s nuts them
chicks yeah it all
i don’t think i’ve ever seen a chick
throw that hard regular
have you ever seen a chick throw that hard regular it’s
clearly the right way to do it
yeah why are they throwing
that’s like
no it’s like it’s like breaking the balls and pool
you know you try to break the balls really hard
if you want like a little person they have like a
loose wrist and just
smash is like a tiny
to it where they just know exactly how to put
their weight into it just hmm
it’s weird like
jujutsu such as certain
things when it comes to techniques
it’s like the more you do techniques
the more those techniques
just become ingrained the way your body moves
your body just gets real good at the movement
so you teach your body move what do you
think of jay
shields control and i fucking incredible
he’s a natural
17 pounder dan henderson’s a
monster he took
first of all
i’m just impressed as fuck that he survived
that first round
that first round he got face
planted he got
ballasted like henderson you have here
on the button no i do i erased it
i raised it
henderson hit him on the button you
erased it yeah i erased it
get it online
we could get it online
we’ll watch that
but uh henderson face plant
face plants
yeah he just have shields
blindly died for a dude
he got cracked and then henderson hits him
again with a hard uppercut dude
and he goes down again he got fucked up in that
first round i was like i always got a chance
but then he came on
strong in the second round and henderson
started to fade a little bit and jake
shield started taking him down
fucking controlling them and they were saying that
that henderson’s been having problems with his back
so you know
he looked kind of
stiff that could have been what’s
going on i could have been why couldn’t
couldn’t stuff the take down but man shields look good
total control
mounted them
just mounted them over and over again
and henderson could not shake them
couldn’t finish them
and never went for one arm walk with that said it’s 420
it is 420 on 420
ridiculous oh my goodness
i am high yeah this is ridiculous
you’re not supposed to do this
i think four twenty is time to order pizza no
wait can me and i want
this is a tv show
no it just takes they don’t give a shit
they do though
there’s people listening this on itunes too
at this point in
time they’re already like are we allowed to eat pizza
i bet no one says no
yeah dude i
you can’t even read son
look i need to get you goddamn more pizza more pizza
pizza for everyone eyeballs fixed
how can you have
an operation get your eyeballs fixed
no no pizza fuck you
fuck you happy three eighty seven hey
how come you haven’t got your eyeballs
are you scared of that
no i’m not scared at all i just haven’t done it
would you want to do it yeah
what about you that part eventually
but like the contacts is just so easy like i don’t
even know their answer i never even got contacts
sometimes i leave my contacts in for like
three or four days and shit i don’t
think you’re supposed to but don’t you want to get him
fixed though would you like to not have the contacts
i yeah tell us we gotta make a plan
this pretty incredible
you can see better
yeah i see fine how naughty is that
means see seeing is so fucking important
you can fix it with a little
piece of plastic
how did they figure that shit
out they figure
out contacts someone figure that out that’s incredible
that’s incredible
house inventions of all i want to see a documentary
all the shit that people change things right now
think about what all the shit that people can do
right now it’s getting so nutty
it’s getting so crazy yeah
what the fuck is gonna be the next big thing
because no one saw the internet coming
you know no one ever thought it was
gonna affect people the way it’s
affecting the human race right now because if they did
they would have never let it get out
no corporations
would have ever wanted the internet it’s too tricky
you know it’s too hard to control
it’s it’s too unpredictable
what the fuck is gonna be the next thing is this isn’t
gonna be the last thing you don’t think that’s it
it’s gotta be like it’s gonna be like hologram laptops
where you’re just gonna need like maybe a little
little block and then it just blows up or something
i think it’s gonna be neural
just thinking it happens i
think it’s gonna be neural implants or
the other idea that i have is
was not a neural implant but that they figure out the
frequency of your brain
like what if they
could get your brain to work like a wi fi signal
like what if your brain
like obviously
input comes into your brain
in the form of hearing things and seeing
things and these electrical impulses wherever the hell
sight and sound is created
and how you represent that stuff in your head
that’s like those are like signals that are coming in
from your eyes from your organs
what if there’s a way to get that signal
out into the air
so instead of like having to be like directly
input into your brain with
just you know with
sight signals and with you know
the signals that your ear is giving what if
there’s a way
to tune the whole mind like a wi fi with some sort of a
neural implant or something that
activates a certain portion of the brain
and literally allows your
brain to tune in to everyone else’s brain
like we all
share a giant hard drive
like that totally seems possible
it seems to me like
they just have to figure out
how that would work and what kind of a
frequency that would operate under but if
they can introduce
all sorts of things in the people’s brains this guy
they did an operation on him
and they stimulated a part of his brain
and he started
i forget what they were trying to do
this was an accident
but in stimulating part of his brain
he started remembering shit from his
childhood like in
graphic detail like it was happening
right there right in front of him
like they literally figured out how to charge
and jump start your memories
you know if they
could do shit like that
they can introduce thoughts to people’s
minds they can read vision they can read vision now
they can like put little
things on your head
and you look at something
and a computer will show an image
of what you’re looking at
that’s incredible it’s the same i mean not good
not a good image they
haven’t figured it out good yet but if you read letters
you’d like see the letter a
really yes but
not like pecan
not yet not yet but dude it’s
close man well then they’ll be able to figure out like
memories exactly
as we might
but how do we
rethink the
world if we realize that
memories are
completely unpredictable
that memories are
so easy to scramble
when you think
about how much of
human history
was just written down and
spoken on memories
lately when i get to argue
about somebody
about something some
waste things happen
and they’re like no that’s not
what happened
you’re like you know what we’re just remembering it
and i have no idea if i’m the one is
wrong or they are
but it’s like
it’s a good way to look at it
and i’d like to say like no no no you’re remembering it
wrong but it’s like why do i
think i’m the one
you gotta be
you gotta be real careful
about that i went back to my town
where i grew up in
i hadn’t been there in like 10 years
and i remembered
everything different man i’ll
never forget that my
house looked different
the fucking
street looked different i thought
the staircase was on a different side of the
street like i had it all fucked up in my head
that’s weird i went to the
place that i love that when i was
three in la
and apartment and my dad got my mom
it was exactly like i
really yeah i was shocked
remembers in a different
way some places changed
they might knock down a
building and change shit around you don’t know
that building was exactly the same
how old you remember
that three i got like
maybe four images
from three that’s cool you
know what i mean but the way the
street looked at you know
the safeway it’s weird
that safeway
i feel like
this time you’re just remembering having remembered
you know so you remember the memory you had a year ago
and then you remember the
memory you had
two for that
you remember your memory of the yeah
i don’t even
think i have
those original old memories
yeah we’re thinking
about and then
one little thing can
throw you off and then it
shifts your idea oh no that’s not what happened
oh wait no no no this happened and then all of a
sudden you see it better
but you were just committed to the way you saw it
10 seconds ago
it was the incorrect way
it’s not fucking reliable enough
it’s what i was
thinking what i was
thinking before about
like the reason why
turtles lived to be a thousand years
and people only
lived to be a hundred
is i don’t think you can
keep our purpose going
and keep us living
because the way society seems to work best
is that people don’t
live long enough to figure out that it’s all bullshit
cause if they do then chaos
everything goes
to a different way
and that’s not the way that
humans are going
right now the way we’re
going is like
some sort of a global domination
thing some sort of a
technological singularity
thing we’re moving further and further and further
if we were able to step back and
as a culture get old enough to realize how
silly that all is
and realize how much better life
would be if we all just
relaxed and shared resources and be nice to each
other and treat the
world as if
we’re friends and work this all out together
but nothing
would ever get done
things get done because people
are competing when people competing people hate the
other people they’re competing against
whether it’s
countries or companies or
political parties or anything so
when that kind of shit happens
that competition is why we make newer and better things
if there was no competition like that there
wouldn’t be the pressure
to be the best at everything
if you didn’t hate the
other people
there wouldn’t be this pressure to dominate them and
crush them that’s part
of progress
can we live in a
world like the amazon indians
in the whole world
well there’s a reason why
those dudes are
still running around with fucking
pieces of animal
flesh covering
their dick is that
right i don’t know if it’s
wrong maybe
that’s right
maybe it is it’s certainly an alternative but i think
i think we have to look at
human nature as being natural
and i think that if we look at
everything else is being natural if we look at the way
wolves behave
and the way
monkeys behave we look at
their simple lives
as being natural why don’t we look at the course of
humanity as being natural
we’re pretending
that it’s something that we all consciously control
but if we do why is it so fucked up still
why is there so much political corruption
when we know there’s so much political corruption
why are we still
going to war when
we know that wars are
ridiculous and that they’re only ways for profit why we
keep continuing
along the same lines even though
rationally we must know at a certain
point in time
this is an insane way to live
well maybe it’s because that’s just the way people live
so that’s what people do i believe
that we’re moving towards
that this behavior
pushes us towards something it pushes us
towards some creation some kind of some global purpose
something some end of
world we’re all in little
worlds thinking
it’s all about us
but meanwhile
you know whatever’s
going on you’re just producing an energy
that needs to
collectively do something
to the world or something
like we got our little lives and it goes to what
ari was saying
about that parasite
like think about that
think about the animal that this parasite lives in
the animal this parasite lives in has no fucking idea
you know they have no idea no idea
not aware of
existence at all and
the rat has no idea
the cat has no idea what it eats the rat i mean the
whole thing is bananas
it’s bananas and it’s all
they said it’s possible to make
those crazy cat ladies too because
a few people aren’t
immune to the fucking parasite
they said there is a
certain person i don’t know why
there is a certain cat parasite
that has infected a tremendous amount of the female
population in like brazil
and a bunch of
other countries and this is
an actual parasite that makes women more docile
yeah probably the same thing it was
no fear i have to look that up because i remember that
yeah but they make some da
sound make some ice for me market that shit
i know right
that’s why women
in brazil i have to find this i have to google this
right now this is
too strange i have to find this out
because i can’t remember what it was when i read it
i’m just parasite
in brazil cats women i gotta find this fucking article
mood altering cat parasites make women friendly
and men into jerks dude that’s brazil
i mean think about how many
how many really
friendly girls come from brazil and how many
super aggressive dudes
that’s hilarious yeah
if you look up what
google what i looked up
you come up with
quite a few articles about it it’s a parasite that
causes rats to sacrifice themselves to cats
may also change human behavior
making women more outgoing and warm
hearted and men
more jealous and suspicious
the toxoplasma
protest is a shed
it’s shed in cat feces
which are then eaten by rats
infected rats become fearless in the presence of cats
which makes them easier to catch
which in turn
spreads the disease to new cats holy shit
it makes women nicer
and it makes men douchebags that’s hilarious
nature is totally rooting against us
they’re finding new ways to keep it fucked up how
crazy is that man how crazy is that because
men who are more douchey are more likely to fuck
a bunch of different women
and impregnate them like fuck their friends women and
you know i’m saying like the more douchey the guy is
the more he’s
gonna do like creepy shit to go get laid
so the more likely it’s gonna make like
accidental babies all over the place
and it’s gonna keep spreading yeah maybe
nature likes douchebags
well it’s like
it goes back to what i said it’s like it’s almost like
you don’t really achieve
unless there’s competition
and competition
doesn’t really mean anything
unless it’s competition
like like primal
you know a man
who hates you you hate him and he hates you
and it really
forces you to work hard
you know that’s why companies fucking hate each other
companies that compete
against each
other are rarely friendly
you know they fucking hate each other
maybe they’re supposed to
maybe that’s the most efficient way to get
things done
you have to
light a fire
under someone’s ass in
order to get the most productivity out of them
hate equals productivity
yeah it’s like
your life would certainly be better off if you
didn’t have that you know that aspect to you but you
wouldn’t be a
successful person
that aspect
to you either so uh
so it’s like a mess fucked up shit like war
you know that’s how it’s supposed to happen
that’s a that’s a terrible conclusion
it’s a terrible conclusion but
it might be that
everything we do is the way we’re supposed to do it
yeah there you have it jealous for war
it’s not that i
wanna do it
but someone’s
gonna do it you know
it’s just the
way they’ve been doing business forever it’s
gonna take way too long for that to settle down
all these people that promise that they’re not
gonna have war anymore
like look at
obama he promised that he was
gonna stop all this
he’s gonna pull people out and
just more in than ever
no i still think remember how
george bush
made fun of her playing golf they said
obama has already played more golf than george bush has
and like i think his
first term in his
first year he’s played
thirty two times i said george
bush played
twenty eight and he called that flag for
twenty eight times
obama’s a very
smart guy very good speaker
that’s really all i i have to say
about in other than that
i’m not seeing anything different
he’s not doing any of the
things he said he would do
you know i don’t know
about the stimulus package i don’t know what’s
gonna really happen with that or whether that’s not
gonna be able to look
into that shit because that’s too fucking complicated
and did you look into healthcare
no they didn’t
even bother nah
fuck it well maybe a little documentary my problem
my problem with all the
stuff is where do i put my attention
how much time do i have in a day what do i want to
think about do i want to concentrate on
oh how are they fucking us
oh you know
where’s this more corruption coming in what is this
do i really want to
focus on that
sometimes focus on the fucking november ballot
with a legalized
pot completely
that would be insane
what’s the latest
about re and
eddie and myself are medical patients we are
yeah we’re all sick i have insomnia
lower back pain i got injured at two surgeries yeah
yeah it’s all real yeah so and and
and it’s a nice calming agent
for you like during the day it’s a perspective enhancer
right i just do it for the insomnia
i say i don’t smoke pot all the time i just smoke
before i have sex
before i do comedy before i
write comedy before i do jiu jitsu before i know i’m
going to eat something delicious
so it’s not all the time
it’s just before cool shit
to make it i almost feel like now whenever i’m like i’m
gonna go get a burrito or something like oh let me
make this better
and then i’ll get the burrito
the first time eddie got me high we went
and got ice cream sundae it was like um
what is this
you went on stage that
night and you were talking about how great that ice
cream sundae was i couldn’t believe it it was the
greatest thing ever we had to write you wrote material
about how good it tasted it was so good
well right and right away the material made more
sense like i could write material
right there
the first time we’re going on
by the way the iron sheik
smoke weed only during his big fights
before all hulk hogan fights
that’s so crazy to notice
that’s what he said he
likes talking about that class
he likes smoking weed
after he trains and after he wrestles
unless it’s a big
match like bob acklin all the hulk hogan
he was always hydrated
he loves weed he knows a lot about weed irish
knows his shit i mean he also
knows a lot of other shit too but
the iron chic
is a pothead
i got i got a fucking
forty five minutes
worth of interview with them i’m
gonna start posting little clips
i got it all where
this what you weren’t there when i tell the story last
night i walked in towards the end of it oh okay
my buddy danny calls me up and goes dude
i’m gonna fucking meet iron
cheek right now how the fuck did that happen because
he’s in town for like the comic con
or what a comic that
whatever whatever like a comic book convention
he goes and i twittered his manager and i
asked his manager if he could
if i gave him 200
bucks if he
could record an answer machine he wanted
to make one like the one joey has for me he loves it
he want an iron
sheet to have
or to do his
so the manager you know they need money
the manager goes come on down
we’re at this hotel
and i go oh
shit he goes you want to roll i go fuck yeah
so he jumped in
went to the hotel
but they were waiting outside and like
danny pull up as fuck
it looks like they’re in a fucking big
hurry cause he was texting him
hurry up where you guys at
we gotta go to the airport as fuck i wanted to give
him 200 bucks
to sit and rap with him and get a lot of shit
you know so
um said fuck it whatever so let’s do it really
quick so he pulls into this
hotel i don’t
shoot like brood and shit
he’s like oh we
gotta go to the airport just make this
quick let’s make this quick
like oh man okay whatever
unless you want to take me to the airport
you know that
we drive into the airport
and we’re like yeah yeah
that way we get him for fucking 40 minutes man
so we got we had in the car
video dude we just
we had this
final of us
you should make
a documentary
dude it’s like
forty five it’s like
forty five minutes of plastic
shit just take the
whole forty five minutes let’s put on
one chunk yeah
definitely got
certain pieces
they need to be cut to make them funnier
yeah yeah because we
we did a lot of
cool because he gets paid he’s like a
like a super villain through it’s like almost 70
and you to say okay say and his manager was his nephew
let’s say he barely
speaks english his english ain’t that great
and like danny knows all these rock stars and he goes
you say west borland say west borland
fuck him and then his manager goes yeah
bring them down set them up
and then take them home it was like these code words
it’s on the video i forget what it is
slam them take them home
and then glaze them at the end or some
weird lindo
so then he goes okay
tommy lee fuck tommy lee
some big boobs
i fuck i am
the shit called couple clutching family
so he was made he would just say all
these things they want to cut them off
and like send
these guys the messages like here’s i heard
it’s always fuck you in the ass
would you look apple clutch fuck your mother
and just disrespect
you would be humble yeah thank you
it’s like he’s got his that’s how he makes his
money i give him some
money i say what do you want me to say
it’s like what is his personality like outside of that
um like a nice guy like
he’s not so he’s not like that all the time
man you gotta see
you gotta see that at the clip
damn he’s teasing i got
it i got it you see
we’ll put it online later
that’s hilarious man
that’s one of
those dudes that would
love to meet when i met hulk hogan i was like holy shit
i’m still here talking to hulk hogan
you know like when i have to do that interview with him
and he’s like brother you know we’re getting
fired up at
tia brother
and i’m like god damn i’m talking a
whole fucking hell
yeah dude iron
chic was probably
all time number one villain ever
think about it
what was bigger than iron chief
he wasn’t really a villain
it was like half of
he was good he was like half villain
path though
sometimes iron
chief was fucking
evil dude he was iranian we’re
going nuclear war type shit
you know that was deep
yeah that wasn’t another
crazier villain
than him he’s on
a cane walk i
got really badly hurt from wrestling
you know i just love to her fucked chester venturas
takes thing take the same robert he
crushes it i want to get dirt for
talking about hulk hogan he’s oh man he’s he’s a he’s
man those guys don’t
have to get operated on
they all have to get operated on
that’s a time of life
so such a tough life
to do that every
night what they’re
doing is nutty shit man flying out of turnbuckles
he shot he talks about that
he just does
oh no
definitely knows this guy who
said things that weren’t very nice but eddie bravo
what do you say
you don’t brush your teeth in the morning
no like he started the interview like they asked them
some guys interviewing them and then this is jujutsu
legend and some guys interviewing him and says
the video starts on the eddie bravo section of twitter
draco lino on the gee
draco lino on world champion
draco lino on training
eddie and then they got the eddie ross
the champion
i guess i mean
i always heard about him i always knew
about him i never knew what he looked like
until i saw the video i never i was never
but especially one of the very highly
regarded yeah one of the best guys
about grace an older guy now probably 40 something
and the video start talking about who
mango what about what do you think of eddie bravo
and then who johnny bravo
who said johnny bravo
no no eddie bravo no johnny bravo oh johnny bravo
like he’s just like
oh yeah you really thought he said johnny bravo
like that’s even funny
you know and then
immediately it starts off with just
a bunch of backhanded compliments like
yeah he’s got some good positions oh yeah but
you know mean already had a high guard like he was like
like basically saying that
nino had my
style of guard first when me and nino
style guards are totally different
they’re nothing they’re nothing they’re
very difficult to offer
i mean we both play
you know we do roma platas and
stuff and i got to build a plata for him but the actual
style of our guards is very different and
obviously he doesn’t know that you know he
doesn’t he hasn’t really paid attention good
enough to know the difference big fucking difference
and then he says other stuff like
that’s just a bunch of backhanded
compliments it wasn’t very but
i thought it was hilarious and so she knew about that
so that she knew about that oh i don’t
know you said a lot of good things about me thanks man
i really can’t say anything bad about the record
you know i mean i don’t even fucking know
well you know what man i think
there’s a lot of people that don’t know you
and you have a polarizing effect
because you’re so controversial because
just i mean
the way you look the way you act you know
your behavior
is very controversial
you think about like
most jiu jitsu people
jiu jitsu instructors they’re not like these wild
musician motherfuckers
you know that come up with
jiu jitsu moves because they’re high on weed
like that fucks up their whole dynamic
their whole view of what you know jiu jitsu is and so
because a lot of dudes don’t know you
i think that’s where
the controversial
comes in but if they got to know you they realize
that you’re just a completely open minded dude
who’s willing to accept techniques from anywhere and
gives people credit all the time and you invent moves
or you teach moves
based on people’s names
like the duda
or different
techniques that you’ve got the jean jacques
suite that you got from
each individual you give them all credit
they just don’t know
they see you getting all this credit for this
revolutionary type of
guard and so they just assume that it’s all bullshit
it’s all overhyped
when really it’s not
it’s not arrived you got
some weird wild shit you put it together in
like a real system
and it’s very legit
and it’s very unusual
and you’re willing to talk to anybody
and have them fuck with it
and come up with their own
stuff i mean look at all the different
things that you’ve
added from your students
all the moves
edwin stuff you
know how you
start incorporating that into class
you know all sorts
of different shit the japanese neck times you’re always
adding whatever there’s a new
thing you’re always adding it and always giving
the person credit
who created it
that’s one thing that’s probably the one thing
that the biggest
misconception the biggest
is that you take credit for
things yeah is that i take moves and i
change the names
then i pretend like i made them up
and i put a
whole new name
like there’s a lot of people out there to
think that and that’s
that’s like kind of true
or like not really sort of 50
it’s totally the opposite
it’s the opposite i give everybody fucking
well like a
twister you know when you
first started doing the
twister and it
started wrestling
yeah that’s a big that was the big
thing because i
never called it the
twister i got it was the
wrestlers guillotine to me but
the guillotine
was already
taken twister
right and jean zhang
it was the guillotine was already
taken in jiu
jitsu and submission
grappling all that shit
so when i would call
the guillotine
the brazilians just called it the
twister and it
stuck after a while
so a lot of people
think like russells go
that did that in high
school man i’m like
yeah you gotta know the
story so real quick
it’s easy to convince
those guys if they ask
about me like what’s up with this
twister thing
you know that’s a guillotine in wrestling
they go yeah yeah he’s got a
bunch of moves like that dude he just
changed his names and then
real quick now i
gotta dig myself out a deep hole with
a lot of people like that that’s like
a total opposite misconception
that i like take moves and
steal em and
it’s not like i did it for a
while and then
i had to stop and slow down and change my life
from day one
my first book i give everyone credit
my first broke
marcelo silverado do that
all that shit
i’ve i get pissed off
when people
learn techniques
from someone else and i know them personally i know
where they got the move from
and then they
start showing it to someone
and they’ll
bring up the person that
taught them
that offends me
i always remember to
bring up names but i
tried to as much as i can you
think of jujutsu moves
as like a creative
thing that you’re adding to like one big gigantic
piece of artwork like the martial art itself like
when you invent a new technique
like you invent some new
sweep or some new way to set up a google plata
and then you add it to the
jiu jitsu language
do you feel like that’s what
it is like it’s almost like you feel like it’s like a
piece of art
so it was something that you create
and people don’t give you credit for creating that and
then people are out there doing it it’s like they’re
stealing your art almost
cause they’re
gonna do it regardless
but he wants them to
do it yeah it’s fun he
wants them to
do it that’s the
thing anybody who’s doing his shit he supports me
i mean like aoki
you’d love that guy out
there doing your shit you’re supporting yeah totally
i mean i’m human
i want you know if someone
learns some
shit directly from me or my books or anything
you know the
right thing to do is give credit
you know that’s the
right thing to do
and not giving credit
is you did you know whoever you
learn a technique from
you gotta give them
you got to if you don’t you’re a douchecraft and that
way it doesn’t take away from what you did at all
people think that somehow another you
teaching a guy you know a certain way to set up a rear
naked and then he does it
and then you
give him credit it takes away from him no it
doesn’t take away
from him not at all not at all it’s just the friendly
thing to do
anytime i get
things to do anytime i pull off a submission
that someone else
in class showed me
i’ll always go up and go dude got it
twice a day you know what i mean yes
do the same
thing it’s like
i do the same thing yeah
yeah that’s important man
it’s important
it fosters that friendly attitude too you
know all i’m trying to do
i mean i guess it feels good it’s like a
piece of art
and something i always feel good when a new
transition comes up out of nowhere or someone else
one of my students
teaches me or we see it on the
internet i get
excited it’s cool it’s
like a little
piece don’t do it have no idea how complex it
is they really have no idea how many levels and
layers there are just
like i was talking to nathan
we were talking
about how he trained
with marcello
and i went down new york in
training a couple of times
and he was just talking
about how good
marcello moves and how
it’s really amazing to see someone operate on that
level and we just
started thinking
about it like how humbling that is
like when you’re around a guy like
marcelo or a
jaguaro or something like that
i watched a video of
jaguarin online rolling through people
just rolling through one dude
after another just submitting a left
right left right left right
when you see someone who’s at that high level
you know it’s like it’s so humbling
because you realize how many goddamn
layers there are to this and
it never ends
it’s more complex and more
the guys who are competing
against are faster
and they’re diving on shit with more precision and
their technique is
more crisp and more
sharp and more options
dude there’s 12
different ways that i can
count there
maybe more 12 different ways to play off your back
that’s what i can count 12
distinctly different
styles like
there’s a difference you can tell
to the train guy
someone could tell
he’s playing deep
half he’s playing
x guard he’s playing
you know lockdown hat
he’s playing 50 50
guard he’s playing
butterfly guard it’s you know he’s playing
rubber guard
there’s all
there’s 12 of them that i
could count there
might be more
adelahiba guard spiral guard all that shit
there’s so many
it’s so complex i mean i’ve been doing jujutsu
16 years and i suck at most of those guards
like i’m not that good at
my mandela heba
guard doesn’t exist
there’s that’s a whole different style spiral
guard inverted guard i never do any of that stuff
i never play 50 50 guard
i never do any of that shit
i have like
four or five guards i have like four or five
guards and there’s like 12
there’s a lot of them that i don’t do
there’s so much like all these world champions like
rafael mendes and cobrina and all these guys
their style is totally different than mine
totally like if we talked four hours seminars each
we’d be two different worlds
you know there’s so much to learn
which path you’re gonna take
you know i mean
i’ve been doing like
again 16 years and i’m still
putting new
weapons into the game that’s
i make sure that there’s always new projects that i’ve
never always always always
got to be a new project
and those projects
could take one two
three years to get them
where you need them to be you know
the darse is
still my project from like
you know five years ago
you know i’m not
as good as the top guys are the darse
are pretty good
i’m not as good as
i still got some more
levels to pop through
but over the last year year and a half
via teens and
north south
i suck with those
but they’ve been on my project list
when i go against the
scrubs when i go
against the
white belts new guys
i’m not going to do anything that i’m good at with them
i’m gonna only get shit that i suck at
and try to train my body
i would get into north
south and i go this feels awkward i don’t know how
danny does it
you know but i
would get in there and try to go as far as i can
and i lose it and i go
do something else like cool i’ll come back to it
then try it
again i’m like
they’re not tapping i’m not really
squeezing right
trying to move my location
focus on it like and
after a while
bam you get into the
oh okay this is feeling good
you know eventually it’ll come
and you have to remember that
people forget that
cause a lot of people when they try something new
they go well it feels
kinda awkward fuck that i’m
gonna go back to my shit i don’t know he’s weird
he’s got some strange butts big
you gotta remember that all moves feel
awkward in the beginning and if you want this move it
doesn’t matter
you can master this move
if you want
it you can be a killer with this move it’s up to you
how many reps you’re willing to put in
you know and in jiu jitsu
you know the only sport where you can spar
100 percent every day
everyone just sparse
they put in
as few reps as possible
most people have that
mentality back
unless you force them and that’s what i do i
force my guys because i know
they’re gonna get lazy and if i say
okay everyone do
15 of this and
20 of that and make sure you do that and i
write it on a
board and let them do it
and i just kick back and
you know chill
they’re not
gonna do it
you gotta have people need
people that’s why they hire trainers
they could do
everything they know all the exercises they know they
could do it
they just need someone to force them
if you have someone to force you
and you’re paying them
then it’s easier to go through that shit you never do
and then you can roll it
afterwards and actually get to try it you know
when someone
doesn’t know for me i just look at
everything most
things is like long term projects like
how many cycles
have you gone through with this technique
and eventually by
third or fourth cycle
once you hit it bad look now he’s doing a new role
look at him
yeah it’s hard to
motivate yourself to push yourself
it is definitely important to have something pushing
rolling is so much more fun
than drills
yeah actually
can you imagine getting on a
video game and
do you ever get on the practice
no you ever like
just practice the little
movements over and over like 50 times like okay this
do people do that
like they get in
a room where they can just practice move
and now they’re getting really good with all the moves
and they do all the techniques
quick players do it
i’ll do that it’s like a workout
they can wake up well
quake is based on a map
it’s based on map
systems so like there’s a
bunch of different
maps you play on but one of the most important
things about playing quake
when you’re in a one on one duel
is to understand the map
you gotta know
where the guns are hidden you
gotta know where the ammo’s hidden and you
gotta control the map
so what you
gotta do is you
gotta make sure you know
every fucking
every minute
area and you can move around so
they practice like special jumps
and rocket jumps they
practice jumping into certain areas and like
so they don’t get to
really far and then crumble
so they’ll practice that shit they practice it so they
have complete command of the
map so they can move around the map anywhere they want
and then they practice timing
when the how is
quake bound
is there a new version
cause you’re playing that
for 10 years
yeah the latest
best version though is quake
iii to me quake
iv is pretty badass
what’s the latest
i think quake
iv is the last
it takes years to make them
you know everyone they did
they came up with a new doom what
every year when
they get better and better i don’t know anything
about video games does does
like the graphics
and the graphics and the amount of area you can
travel to always bigger that’s a they
get bigger and bigger
to have some games they call
a massive was it
mmorgs or something like that
it’s role player games massive
world it’s like an artificial
world role player game
where you can just
travel for miles and meet new people and
people live
their whole lives inside
those things
and they’re actually real people
the people that you meet in there they’re real people
playing the game real people playing the game yeah
they’re great
people have lost
their mind when it comes to
these things i’ve
never heard of that
what does this game call
they starve
these two people in
korea let their baby starve
while they were nourishing
their online baby
they have fake
baby online and they were taking care of that baby
while the real baby starve to
death like they lost
their marbles
that’s crazy
people are living in artificial
worlds 8 10
hours a day and addicted
to it what’s it called this game there’s a bunch
world of warcraft there’s
everquest there’s
what’s the other one
the sims there’s
another one something life’s there’s a
half life no no that’s the that’s the cool
video game there’s a
there’s one how many people are
second life maybe it’s called second life or something
dude there’s thirteen thousand two
hundred and ten people no look no
no look about that’s
april thirteenth twenty ten face as we
count the numbers like what the fuck am i watching
watching three retards
stone out of their mind i talk to a camera
thirteen thousand two hundred and ten
all this shit
is it boring
i don’t know
this is a 420 episode
if they’re all with us they’re all with us
i passed out
on pot yesterday
whoa i’ve been close like two or three times last
month or two
in real life is like oh my god
and then i manage to jump to the bed i think
i woke up on the floor
how much weed you smoke man not that much
dude not that much
and it happened to his
girlfriend i had once
and it was like
she had like one hit it wasn’t anything major
what yeah i saw someone do that
we gave that to this
chick was working on fear factor that was one of the
production people
we’re all in new york we’re outside we all
were out there filming there for the weekend
inside a bar i have a
drink you guys
want someone to join yeah come on it’s fun time girl
i just want to be this chick
i guess she’s
never smoked please
she decided she wanted to join in the fun
she took one big hit of some
train wreck
and her eyes rolled back in her head and she was
dropped i thought she was faking
i thought she was pretending like wow i was caught so
i was like i’m
gonna pass out
i thought she was being
silly like we had a catcher
she was falling down to the ground
the girlfriend
was like that she smiled and
i was like what she doing i don’t understand she
didn’t know she was going down did you catch him nope
an effort to
catch her well i was holding popcorn so you did
so you let the fucking chick drop
so you didn’t
have to drop your popcorn i probably wasn’t
gonna be able to
catch her anyway
wow you didn’t see a chance
no i did not
i didn’t understand what was really happening
but it happened to me yesterday
how long did the date was checked
a few months
so how attached were
you to her right
right i was
still dating
so we bummed out when she walked
down she fell
yeah i didn’t
quite get it
until she was
fully down i was like
it’s just faint
she felt all responsible
someone yeah
well he gave us a pod
oh when does he
zombie land
did you watch this
season of celebrity rehab
no you’re not you
don’t watch it i
watch one episode
because that was a
chick too much
for me that
was you know that chick
from one day at a time
mackenzie phillips
she’s in bed
rooming with this
country this ex country
chick singer
do you have epileptic
seizures and
she she went off like in the middle of this
conversation she was just telling mackenzie like haha
and then she
was on film
she’s freaking freezing because it goes like yeah
are you playing it’s all on video wow because he was
replaying that mother you know that replay shit on
reality shows
oh my god have you guys seen shreds you know
what shreds shreds is a thing
these guys are doing they’re taking music videos
and redoing the music like
i just saw from journey they redo the music
as lip syncing totally as perfect as possible
but the worst voices to
everything’s attitude and everything’s out of key
so you see this it’s like the worst rock band ever
they’re really funny dude really yeah jerk
it’s a journey music video
yeah it looks like they suck really
yeah it’s on something shred
let’s watch it and we’ll
anyway you want it journey it’s fine
they did one on mac dan’s
not mac dan’s
like the singer and
he’s friends with
this guy i know
and he said when he showed it to him to he
got really offended
really yeah
so they’re doing it to journey they’re doing
and journeys like
you know they’re like amazing
musicians and singers
okay i looked up shreds
journey shreds what shreds journey that’s it
any way you want ead
or ed i think it
no no it’s with the
it’s with the
no okay that’s right
sure journey
this it junkie
shreds that’s it that’s it that’s it the top one that’s
junkie shreds no
you guys gonna have to look up junkie shreds i’m
it’s not junkie jerk knee jerk
journey more like journey oh journey
i didn’t get it either
all right here goes let’s see what this
that’s the way you need it anyway you want it
oh god oh man oh every night
all kinds all kinds baby all kind
anyway you want that’s
he said anybody want that we need anyone
oh oh
it’s genius that’s very funny that’s good shit man
i just you guys can watch it i just sent it to twitter
the solo dude this solo is so bad
it’s so cool you can do that so easy
you mean it’s so easy to do
stuff like that now to edit video and put it online
like it’d be nice to be hard to do that
listen to song on earphones record here
sing it right along with them after doing it yeah
a lot of people have already seen it
go look up van halen or or different
that was some funny shit yeah
yeah it was funny i’ll try to read some of these
we might be too high to be doing this should be
probably starving maybe again should be a little re
bad bladder
that was loud yeah sorry about that one
probably didn’t do that the best way
kids shreds
no i heard you were publishing a
scientific paper and neuroscience that’s hilarious
if that wasn’t true i would be carlson seeing it
some dude wrote some shit in arabic
arabic does look cool doesn’t it
look how cool that shit looks what arabic
yeah it’s probably the coolest
thing in writing on the planet
probably cooler than chinese or japanese
that shit it looks like
something elegant to it you know
it’s like cool to see it on your wall
you know it’s like art
so this chick wants to fuck you dude
slurpella she’s back oh shit she says
explain the name slurpella
where’d you get that from who gave it to you
did you dub
yourself 1600 people in here man there’s no way
you have to keep an eye on it to catch her in response
can i get dave chappelle in here sometime i
would love to hang out with dave chappelle
but i don’t know him that well
we did a show a couple times
and one time was just because i was walking down the
street and i ran into him
another time was the fear factor one
the one we ran into him was hilarious
remember that you were with me
now in new york
we were just walking down the
street and i’m
like that looks like dave chappelle with a mustache on
hey joe you
wanna be in my show
was like okay it was out of nowhere
no his show
times square just walking down the street
that was when the dave chappelle show
you know nobody had any idea it was even coming out
and then when it came out like
right away it was like the best show ever
yeah first sketch
i’m sure it was like no no no let’s
leave with that one
knocked it out of the park
that was the best show ever was that the
first sketch ever i
think so i don’t know i know it’s the
first sketch
i know it’s the
first sketch
on the top 25
because i think when he said it i
think i remember going like
lilo’s my friend said i shouldn’t do this
sketch but it almost seemed like he had
introduced a few
other sketches already
maybe the audience
knows the answer to this
that’s a good question
there’s like intelligence the audience here
we could find out anything
about that how
about we couldn’t remember that dude’s name
earlier dennis hopper bam
just knocked up
yeah that’s incredible
yeah i mean there’s
there’s sixteen
hundred sixty six one six six six we’re evil
we’re officially dude
got a lot of viewers
see there’s some dudes writing some other shit
they wrote shiny
happy jihad listen man
don’t be mixing my shit up
with that shit because i don’t know what you’re saying
did you buy the chicken nevada that got sent to
life in prison
because she talked to 14 year old
boy i just wanted to try to get him have sex with her
and she grabbed his hand and put it on her tit
and tried to get her to fuck her
and the man
like she got life
in prison that is the mandatory
sentence for that
life in prison is a man’s voice
the kids 14 years old and she’s like 34 or some shit
and she grabbed the kid’s hand and put it on her tick
and she said she was drunk
and she doesn’t remember any of it
and this bitch is
going to lie
in their way
yeah that’s possible
so what she
doesn’t remember
it she did it all she did was put it together she did
you know obviously the bitch is
crazy and she needs to do like a
night in jail or
maybe a week at the most
you know like
sometimes you
could think
about what it
would be like to
spend one month in prison
that would fucking destroy a lot of your life
and people were like oh
maybe he’s got at
least 10 years like
think about what a
month yeah in prison
would be like
yeah that would be horrifying
terrible terrible
and for just getting a boy to
touch a kid
i mean yeah you
should have done it
but come on you’re supposed to like slap on the wrists
until you get out of there that’s
what happens
so she’s not even eligible for parole
for 10 years
she has to go ten years before she’s
even eligible i’d like to know the details of that case
it’s gotta be some
stuff that’s not she
might be she’s done
this before
you guys you
fucking support that
how dare you
i know but it seems an unbelievable
i can’t it’s hard to believe that people are that
stupid to give
someone life
for that yeah
i mean that’s why it’s an interesting
story when your
favorite in
class got thrown out and like what you do like no
thanks move my chair
two times phrases
like no you didn’t you were moving it over and over and
told you to
stop that’s all well and good but that was the charges
what the charges were
most of it is
lootness minor
she’s been selling kids
for a while
eight probably wasn’t the
first time crazy the
speed breaking
sucks dick on the little kids that
doesn’t stop
well if she did it to this kid she’s probably doing the
other one it’s not like she’s been fucking grown man
just said no just take
yeah big time
it’s not like yeah like all of a
sudden out of nowhere
she says let me just dive in this fourteen year old
think she’s done before
just not particular
about who she blows
you know that’s all that is she’s just a
crazy bitch
but you shouldn’t have to
go to jail for the rest of your fucking life that’s not
you know they’re trying to put kids in jail for sexting
they’re trying to make sexting illegal
for kids girls are shutting
to child porn
they’re saying
child porn good for teens
because you’re a
child pornographer
isn’t that nuts
of course right
dude what are they kids doing it to each other yes
child porn setting to their boyfriends
wanna hear a crisis
tour a bunch of boys
got suspended i
think it was like nine girls got suspended
from this one
school because they had a
bunch of pictures that they took
and put on their myspace page
in between school when they’re not at
school like during
their summer break
so when they came back to school they were suspended
because of sexy pictures of
their myspace page they’re like sucking figures
sticking their ass out and doing
stuff and they’re only like 14
you know they’re just doing normal horror shit
and they got
suspended so the girls are suing the school
they’re gonna win
i mean if it can go on myspace you can’t tell someone
they can’t do something
during their off time because you don’t like it
just because you’re teaching them you know when did
these fucking retards be
watching our students at school
what’s that people accessing it at school
well you could access to that
school if you had access to myspace at school
i don’t know what kind of internet access they have at
school yeah but either way
the kids should be able to put up you
know she wants to be a whore she wants to be a whore
you can’t legislate against that and
you certainly can’t punish them for shit
that’s illegal to do
yeah you’re acting like you’re
their fucking mom
like you’re saying you don’t want them in
school for the
it’s gonna give
other people a bad impression
of your school is that what it is
cause she’s in her underwear online
shut the fuck up
it’s one of these dummies
that are teaching
our kids today and that’s the problem there’s a
bunch of them who are fucking dummies
when did they become the parents when did they become
the moral arbitrators
when did they become the people who dictate
how people were supposed to behave
you know if you don’t have a problem with your kid
sticking her ass
up in the air in myspace
and you’re the
teacher you should be like whatever i’m gonna
teach you some science and you get through life and
enjoy yourself
but what the
teachers supposed to step in and say
you shouldn’t be in your underwear when you’re mad at
school fuck you
who are you
you just teach just teach me
you don’t get to fucking shut my life down
because you don’t like me in my
underwear that’s ridiculous
see ya no i said that
i said it in first person like i was a 14 year old girl
it was a secret fantasy
he didn’t even know it was that
how old are they 14
they were 14 14 15 years old that’s wrong
look man you can’t stop chicks from doing horror
shit they arrested a 15 year old girl for
child pornography because she sent a dude
in her class a picture of her prison
so they arrested her
they eventually
charged her with
use of criminal tools
and a criminal tool was a cell phone
what’s the charger
how nutty is that that’s incredible
that’s all that like what was that alabama
i don’t know
i know tiny little facts is he
yeah brian’s fucked
hi everyone i love you i’m also invited
oh that’s so sweet
poor brian wanna hear how dumb brian is
brian bit into a spoon
he was eating some yogurt
bit down first of all
son you’re not supposed to bite that goddamn hard on
yogurt you know
how hungry was he
he bit down into his
metal spoon he
must have slurp
it there yeah what are you doing biting it
i wanna eat yogurt
only plastic
spoons from now on for you
so he bit down on a
spoon and broke
his tooth that’s
this guy said he’s
gonna put me in a triangle
choke how dare you
are you scared i don’t
wanna tell i don’t like being caught triangles
that’s uncomfortable
i’m scared for you i’m
scared that you’re scared now you really got me scared
i was said he was stoned eating yogurt
he was eating yogurt thinking about yummy dicks
just got outside of the clamp down
i think we talked
about all the things i want to talk about
i talked about the lady in nevada
talked about strike force and mayhem
any other comments
eddie oh mike
whitehead got busted for weed and sexual assault
that sucks that’s not good for the movement mike damn
that sucks was he drunk too
i hope it’s all bullshit i hope he was drunk
jack narrator
didn’t he die a year ago no he had a massive
heart attack you’re going
based on they just thought
really i thought
he was dead the whole time
i didn’t know he was a person they thought he was done
there’s a bunch of people sent like i
think even doug benson
set out an rip
a lot of people were saying he was dead
and so there was a
rumor going around
but it wasn’t his
dad but he was
basically like
barry newell
he was basically the
not actually
well i don’t know the scientific
medical details
but i know that he was in really really bad
shape from the time of that
till now so who was it
so it wasn’t that he was just really
powerful marijuana
activist that
started out his life as like this gold
water republican type guy who was like really anti weed
and then he got divorced
smoking pot with this woman
that he had just met this new woman he
took a chance and he was a single guy
hanging out with some chicken
and really kind of was
blown away by it and then
fell in love with the
effects of marijuana
and then started looking into the history
and then he put out this
really fucking amazing book
called the emperor wears no clothes
and it’s all
about this marijuana
he wrote it in jail
putting him in jail
the reason he went to jail is because
he before he
wrote the book he was already a
like a marijuana
activist for certain
things there’s so many ways you can
fight for marijuana but
i forget exactly what he was
fighting for in the very beginning
he was protesting in
front of a federal building
reagan showed up reagan
told the people the federal building
haven’t handled
yeah the cops come arrest everybody
all they had to do is pay like some
twenty dollar
ticket or something
he refused to pay it
and he went to jail for
a year and two
yeah he went to jail
he was hardcore
he wrote that’s where
it was good for him
that’s where he had the time to
write that for
his own clothes he
voted in jail
that’s amazing yeah
it’s amazing
it’s a good book too it’s really very detailed
if you want to know anything
about the history of propaganda and of
hemp being made illegal
everybody thinks the
reason why marijuana is illegal is because it’s bad for
you i mean if you ask like 100 people 75 of them are
going to tell you it’s bad for you
it’s something it does
brain damage
causes some problems
but that’s not why it’s illegal it’s illegal because
when they figured out a way to process hemp
fibers more effectively they came up with this
thing called
it was a machine
that grinds up the hemp and makes the
fibers easier to process
william randolph
hearst owned
paper companies
and he also owned newspapers and these
paper companies they make
paper out of fucking wood and this hemp
paper was much better it was far superior
and it was a competing product
so he wanted
to make it illegal so what he decided to do was
print newspaper articles
where they said that
blacks and mexicans were raping
white women i knew it
what is this
and the reason why
they said the reason why they were raping
white women is because
they were smoking this due drug called marijuana
so when congress made marijuana illegal
they didn’t even know they’re making the textile
you know the fabric the you know all the
things that hemp can make
they didn’t really even
know they were making that illegal too they had no idea
it’s really
completely ridiculous
the fact that it’s stuck
from the 1930s all the way you can hear
2010 even though we know it’s ridiculous
i mean you can go
right now we can go down the corner
store and buy
jack daniels and
drink ourselves to death easy
if we walked in with there right now
we each bought
a big ass bottle like a gallon jug of jack daniels all
three of us in line
no one would bat an eye
that’s lethal doses
we just bought lethal doses of alcohol
and we could just come here and the
three of us would
drink those
drink that jacked candles
until our body
literally shut the fuck down
that sounds cool
how crazy is it
that people would even bat an eye that marijuana
should or shouldn’t be illegal
of course it
should be legal
if you can go and buy jack daniels that’s ridiculous
ridiculous yeah i’m fucking hungry yeah
you want to end this thing sounds it
5 18 i think we did enough talk about silver
i think we’ve already talked
about silver enough you know
i think they’re
bored enough anderson
silva saying he’s
gonna take all the ufc belts
you know what
maybe anderson silva is
bored at 185
pounds maybe that’s
the reason why his last performance wasn’t up to par
you know who the fuck knows man you don’t know
until you’re inside that dude’s head
you know he’s obviously brilliant
you know and he’s
fighting and he’s probably a very complicated dude
you know but i think
i would like to see him challenged
now chao sun in
fights gonna be very interesting
chao sun is gonna
talk a lot of shit
and he’s gonna attack him
yeah yeah but august
i think it’s gonna be in salt lake city
i don’t know
well chelse signs a real good wrestling
man he beat the fucking
well he beat yushino comedy which was really impressive
cause yushen at the time thought to be like this real
powerful grappler
chelsea and just manhandled them without grapple
the shit out of them kicked his ass
then he beat
nate markport
and i was like oh
that really opened a lot of people’s eyes
and so now he gets this point he
took for a wrestling
really explosive with double leg
take downs and you don’t see that often you
see a lot of greco guys
flying for your leg he does he’s like gsp
with wrestling at 85 that was
a win streak or anything
so he fought
damien maya before that and he got triangles he got
taken down i
think he hit him with a lateral
drop or some sort of a
throw it was really
impressive and damien
mounted them
and then slide the triangle in from
the mountain and pulled them on top of them and tapped
into triangles oh yeah that’s two wins that’s really
sweet yeah those
are two wins that
set but you
know the damien maya thing
look you know
if that guy catches you he catches you
he’s really good at that
chill something’s been caught with
stuff in the past
that would be an interesting
thing if anderson
could submit
him off of his back
that would be fantastic
because you know
chelsun and
at some point
in time if anderson
doesn’t knock him out immediately
chelsun is gonna have anderson on his back
you know unless he catches
them and claws coming in
which is always possible with anderson
so great a sprawling
i have a feeling that
this time this
time chale is gonna take
submission defense in the
guard and pass in the garden
really more seriously i have a feeling you gonna try
yeah i don’t
think he’s gonna come out
cause he gets caught in the guard
cause he likes to
pound in the garden when you
pound in the
guard you can get caught
you know look at the
car in there obedience
he got caught
you know and he’s awesome
he’s awesome with
jiu jitsu but
once chale finally realizes that he needs to get
really good at passing and mountain and taking the back
fuck yeah once he realizes
he needs to adapt
the gsp strategy
once he looks at gsp in a few
fights and says holy shit
i should be doing what gsp is doing
once he makes that decision
chell be unstoppable
that dude’s
got serious cardio too
the reason why he does
great but then you
know he loses he does
great then he loses
it’s because he
he is not taking
guard passing and being safe in the
guard and taking
guard passing
as the number one
priority over ground and pound
in the full
guard you only
should really
pound in the full guard
to open shit up like passing
should be your number one
focus look at gsp
passing is its number one focus
that is the correct attitude well that’s important
what did you think
about what greg jackson said
about gsp well
greg jackson said in the
fight that he didn’t want a gsp to pass his
guarding only took dan hardy down
he said just don’t pass his garbage
route he was
being i don’t
agree with it
i don’t agree with
it ever saying he couldn’t pass his guard
but he wasn’t passing it he was like i
guess we thought he was wasting energy
i just wanted to
go like that beat him up from inside the guard
you know the thing
you guys always say the
tour is good from the half guard
but you can get thrust when
i don’t agree with that strategy
at all ever i would never agree with them but
i can understand it in a way where
i could see that
after gsp passed this guard and mounted them
dan hardy would give this back
then he would post up and then eventually would
shake him up and they would
stand up again that every time so
greg jackson was looking at it was like
if he passes the guards and a mountain
they’re gonna eventually stand up
after he gets his back
up and he gets up
so i think just do it
great jackson just like stay in his guard
he can’t get up from there
he can’t get up from the
guard he can’t get up once he gets his back
you know so just stay in the guard let’s get the w
don’t take a fucking chance with this guy
that’s like the
super conservative strategy
which i understand but
i think gsb was doing fine and i
think he should always go for
the finish he should always go for the past
and you know
he almost had him
twice he almost had a good
one yeah yeah
you don’t want your you don’t want your
partner to get the
orders done you know
john’s donker
they were working on it
afterwards they
were working on tightening what he was doing
wrong the setting of his
kimora telling him to hit it at a different angle
i don’t know i
remember how he did it did he have to leg over the face
that’s pretty damn good i don’t know why
he did that was he in psychiatry
or did he have to leg over the face i don’t remember
with side control but
the camorra looks strong the armbar looks
strong for a couple seconds man armbar was bent
back way back for a couple seconds
dan hardy just
gritted it out rolled his face into the mat turned
and dan only had two scratches on us under his
right eye and he wasn’t hurt his arms were fine
it’s amazing that he went five
rounds of gsp and he barely had a couple nicks on it
you know harvey’s a tough dude
he’s such a
smart guy too
so good at shit talking
so good at those interviews man
i got you know
it’s like it’s such a tricky
thing because in one way that’s like kind of like anti
like what the martial arts is supposed to
stand for talking shit you know but
when dudes do
talk shit they make it so much more interesting
yeah i think they
talk shit back in ancient times like samurais against
the kung fu
dudes and all that shit i
think they talk shit
i can see them talking shit it’s a
tactic you fucks with people’s heads
i’m gonna make you suck my dick
yeah man what it is a tactic you know
fucking with dudes heads it is like a
legitimate technique the problem is that everyone
thinks they’re doing so well
and it like rarely actually kills people off
their games yeah
just seems like
that was woody
sometimes it makes it douchey
two guys are just talking shit to each other
you know sometimes the
you know but when guys are good at it
but it wasn’t like personal
energy going
i’m gonna be honest with you
i really don’t
think i win
but i’m gonna go out and give my all
that’s all i could do what else do you want me to do
would it be awesome if someone went on the internet
and said here’s the deal man
i don’t really have a lot of job options i need some
money and it’s not a lot of
money but fuck it i need to fight
and you know
seeing that
starting it’s gonna be
a song on tv a couple times and i thought you know what
i’m not gonna make some cash with that
my favorite was anderson and one of the times when
they go back and forth they tell you what that guy said
and you say something and they go back and forth
and they said well he’s the
best at fucking
drama school
right but so
they said you know anderson like i said he’s
gonna you know get you down
mount you and
pound you into
submission this is
like that’s a
great tactic
yes i would go
in if that happens right
yeah that’s a
smart way that’s a
smart way of telling it
yeah anderson is pretty good when it comes to
TikTok and how casual and
calm he gets but
apparently he gets very angry
i mean when you saw that
chelsun fight man
or the rather
damian maya
fight he gets real angry
you know damien maya
whatever the fuck damien maya said
really made him bananas in that
second round
i don’t know what the fuck was said or
what but have you ever seen him like that before ever
screaming screaming shit talking like that
what if damian
what would happen if
danny and mae were in a buck’s and
anderson’s silvers
and what if
danny and mae
started doing some fucking
windmill break
this is tough
coming after him
right you know
and then would stop what if he just
started dancing
it would be crazy if i
right in the middle he just started
break dancing
you know that
thing where it’s like
it’s like they don’t
dress it they spin
that would be awesome
girls had to do that
your same here for breakdance
yeah remember you
should do that a little bit and sometimes
earlier fights what
you got really good and you attack someone like that
like you just fucking spun out of myself
like a big propeller
that’s a lot of energy can you imagine that’s a fucking
break that would be badass man i bet the
break dancers would
start making some
noise it was the
sickest fucking baseball
era like this and
fucking switch positions
and make him
break dance
a break dance
card yeah that’s pretty good
what if capo era
got together with
breakdancing and created a new martial art
this is a list
of something
great right
so not me of
those things
just you gonna get fucking boss you can do some kind of
shit and go right to the head spin
when you spin on your head
right yeah and then slide your legs out yeah yeah
it’d be a great way to pass the guard
i think we’re done
yeah that’s probably a good are you guys bored yet yes
ladies and gentlemen
we’re talking about talk about aoki yeah let’s talk
about that real quick while because you’re here
what did you think about the
shiny aoki gilbert melinda
i didn’t let him but scoot very interesting fight
uh you know
gilbert melendez is awesome in the guard
and he did a great job of staying away from any danger
i think maybe once or twice
aoki had an amish control and
smashed it against the cage
that was aoki senez is a bad motherfucker
he’s very good
gilbert has awesome timing his
stand up was wicked
stayed on top of them
you know i mean the only way that strategy was
gonna work for him you know stay
avoiding the guard was if he
could beat him in the stand up exchanges
you know and he definitely did
he beat him in all the stand up exchanges he was not
hard he looked involved he
beat his ass you know
that really could
him now i hope he had the wrists
once in persona that was good yeah
he got the arm trapped a couple times but
just pulled right the fuck out of it
and it was never in any danger at all
so that was a big fight for him
yogi’s just not as good with the fucking with regular
shorts so is jay shields contract demonstrated for us
supposedly yeah which is amazing
if they really let him fight without
a contract saying that if he wins that he’s
still in contract
i don’t know how that stuff works
i didn’t know you could do that i guess you can
if you’re not willing to sign a new contract i
guess you just have to do it
do whatever you want yeah and so
i think he felt like
i think jake
shields was upset because he felt like they were
not respecting him
yeah they didn’t
promote him enough they mostly most of the promotion
that they had was mentioning dan henderson and not him
because he was on his last fight
yeah and they wanted it to be a big deal i mean dan’s
a legend two time
pride champion
in two different way
classes so that was a
big deal for them a big acquisition they thought he was
gonna be the big star
so they were hoping that jake shields
would lose i
guess yeah give him the belt
right away yeah
the other guy off was like an orange i mean his
first fight in the organizations a title fight on cbs
and crazy ass fucking fight to
whoever thought that jake she was be able to take
down him some down that many times just order
pizza and watch it
i gotta go all right
then that’s it ladies and gentlemen
this was the first annual 420 podcast
i think we got some good shit we talked about in there
pretty good
pretty good i don’t think we lost a
train of conversation too much you got the
potato chips
yeah sure i’m
considering the fact that we
we got completely vaporized
like four or five times
it was a really it was not bad
next week i should have
couches in here
and it’ll be all set up and then
the week after that will be can i
swipe my twitter yeah twitter is eddie bravo
twitter at eddie bravo
at eddie bravo ari shafir
joewogan joe rogan net i’m trying to get joe rogan
tenth planet kj com
if you got joe rogan
holla at a nigga
let me know i like to get that from you
alright thanks guys later
have you ever broke one of these bags no
seems so fragile
just firefox is frozen again
this is the
second time
that i’ve shut this off and so everybody can
still hear me right now
it won’t let me log out
close it yeah you know