Aware & Aggravated - 25. How to Make A Change

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Hi friends! So for this episode, I want to talk about some of the things that I’ve recently realized when it comes to making changes and changing your life.

And everything that has to do with that. And y’all, it’s fucking annoying. I’m just going to let you know.

Like, what I’ve been realizing the past couple of days, week, two weeks, is a lot to take in.

And of course, what am I going to do when I realize some new shit?

I’m not going to make myself be the only one dealing with it. I’m going to throw it at y’all too.

Now we all get to suffer. Now we all get to have this awareness and not know what the fuck to do about it.

Not really. This is just going to be really good stuff and things that are going to help you make changes if you want to make changes.

And if you feel like changes aren’t happening, this is how to make them start happening.

And if you want a different life, this is the shit you need to know.

And I’m not talking like major life changes, even though I’m about to run away.

Like, I’m about to do a major life change and abandon my full life. But, this stuff can be used for everything.

So I have no plan for this episode. I’m going to just shoot my shit and just see where it leads me.

But I’m going to start off talking about this big realization I had when I hit 300,000 followers on TikTok.

I woke up and I saw that I had 300,000 followers. And I was like, cool.

Like, I really just didn’t give a shit. Like, I just genuinely couldn’t have cared less.

And I was like, mmm, something’s off. Like, why do I not give a fuck?

Like, this is huge. This is like a big thing. And why am I not excited?

Like, I wasn’t mad at myself for not being excited. I just looked at myself and I was like, hang on.

So why am I not excited? Why do I not seem to give a fuck? And why do I feel numb?

Like, I felt just very numb to it. I’m like, okay, cool. It’s a thing.

Like, there’s 300,000 followers on that account. Cool.

Like, I just am very, like, unimpressed. And I really, it wasn’t that I was unimpressed.

I more just felt numb to it. And it’s cool that I have them, but I don’t care if I didn’t.

You know? Girl, I do care now. After I got through my shit.

I am excited. I am, like, happy about it.

But coming up against these feelings, or lack of feelings, when I should have been excited or felt something at least, you know?

Brought me to the realization and had me come face to fucking face with some shit.

My life is the same. Like, my life has not changed at all.

And typically with social media fame and shit, it’s like,

Anytime growing up, I would watch people on YouTube or I would watch anyone that had a lot of followers.

If you watched them from the beginning, their entire life would change.

Like, they would start making a lot of money. They would move away.

They would start doing other shit. They would start hanging out with other people that were, like, bigger.

And I was like, okay. So it just set up this weird expectation in my brain.

Don’t make fun of me, okay? Don’t make fucking fun of me.

Because I know what I’m going to say is going to sound really fucking stupid.

But there was just this little expectation in my brain that I didn’t realize was like a set expectation where

when someone has followers, their life changes.

When someone has followers, these changes come along with that.

Like, I just thought it was part of the fucking package.

So I still remember hitting 100,000 followers.

And it was New Year’s that I hit it for New Year’s 2022.

I was just like, okay, like, yay, cool.

Like, maybe it’ll start doing something now.

Like, I felt like 100,000 was a good milestone.

And then I hit 200,000.

And I was like, why am I not, like, that excited?

And then I hit 300,000. And now I’m like, I don’t give a flying fuck.

And the whole reason I was, like, void of emotion toward it is because nothing was changing.

Nothing in my life fucking changed.

Yeah, I had a number on an app that said you have a lot of followers.

And when I would go out in public, people recognized me now.

And people say hi to me. And I have little friends everywhere, which is nice.

But I didn’t see and haven’t seen any of the other benefits that come with the typical gaining followers thing.

So it’s like there’s no real point.

Like, I was looking at it like, okay, followers for what?

But that’s another thing that was really frustrating was that I’ve seen people with less followers than me make a lot of fucking money,

have a lot of fucking brand deals, have a lot of shit happening for them and changing for them.

And I started to, like, look around and be like, okay, these people have half the followers that I do.

They get a quarter of the views that I do.

Why the fuck are they getting all this shit and I am not?

That’s when I started looking into getting brand deals and trying to reach out to brands.

And it just wasn’t fucking working. It didn’t work. It didn’t go good.

I couldn’t find any brands I gave a fuck about enough to, like, rep their shit.

Like, I found a lot of, like, booty ass brands that were like, oh, I’ll send you stuff for free promo.

And I’m like, bitch, my follower count is past the point of, like, sending me free shit for a post.

It’s like, now you gotta start paying for a post.

Because if I’m advertising to hundreds of thousands of people, that ain’t free.

Like, I can’t rip myself off.

Like, I have to understand what I have is, like, monetizable.

But I really didn’t put that much effort into it.

But I couldn’t find anybody that I was like, okay, this could be a thing.

So I just kind of quit when I had around 200,000 followers.

Like, I just stopped trying to reach out to brands. I stopped giving a fuck.

I was not seeing the benefits of having followers. I just had followers.

So when I realized I didn’t feel anything toward gaining new followers, that was wise.

Because for fucking what?

Like, if I’m not getting anything for it, it literally just is a number on a fucking screen.

I’m finally starting to see a little bit of something.

Because the coaching thing is, like, starting to pick up.

Like, a lot of people have already scheduled so far, and I’ve done a few calls, and I’m like, whoa.

But I’m starting to see changes.

But the thing that made me make all these changes was not seeing any fucking benefit.

So I literally had to face the realization of, like, nothing in my life has changed,

so why do I give a fuck about my follower count?

But then I was like, alright, fucker, take responsibility.

What have you done to change your life?

You know? And that’s what fully, like, brought me into where I am now.

And I’m like, god damn it.

So, like, don’t just expect your life to change.

That’s not how it works.

Even if you gain 300,000 followers, your life’s not gonna change until you change it.

And that made me really fucking upset.

Really, I really, really did.

Because I’ve lived a lot of my life feeling powerless to being able to change my life.

So I’ve always just kind of, like, subconsciously hoped that getting followers would change my life for me.

I wouldn’t have to do it.

No, bitch. I’m over here and I have to fucking do it.

And my life is only changing right now because I’ve started changing it.

Like, you have to put deliberate action into changing your life or changing something if you want to change it.

And that was my full, like, come apart I had with that.

And it fucking just, ugh, like, it just irks the shit out of me.

Because I can see logically now it doesn’t make sense,

but I can see how I was hopeful before and why I wanted something to just change my life.

Like, when you feel powerless and you feel like you can’t change anything,

you’re gonna shoot for shit that you think will help you change it or change it for you.

So it made sense, the beliefs I was operating from and the hope that I had.

But I got to a point where outside shit wasn’t helping, so I had to face the fact that I’m the one in control.

And then I started making the changes.

And now, oh my god, guess what? My life is changing.

But that’s my first point for this episode.

It’s like, if you want to change, you gotta be the one to fucking do it.

And I know everybody says that.

So I’m gonna get a little more in-depth and give you some more advice,

not just some cookie-cutter bullshit like that.

And nothing’s gonna come save you.

Like, I hoped social media would save me. It didn’t.

It literally fucking didn’t.

It made me feel worse about where I was at.

Because I’m like, goddammit, why is it not working?

And instead of questioning myself and my own value and being like,

why am I not good enough?

Why is it happening for everybody else and not me?

I looked for my power in the situation instead of looking for how I was not good enough.

And that’s what led me to seeing the things that were in my control

and now taking control of them and creating the changes I wanted.

So in the process of making my changes that I’ve been making to my life,

I’ve had a lot of things piss me the fuck off.

And a lot of those things are morning routines.

In daily routines.

Like the shit that you see on TikTok and you see all over social media.

Like people glorifying their morning routine.

Like they wake up, they read a book, they meditate, they drink lemon water,

they go on a walk, they have a nice hearty breakfast with like 45 fucking ingredients.

Like these people glorify the living shit out of drinking some fucking water

and waking up in the morning.

Like girl, why y’all doing so goddamn much?

I don’t understand why social media has made it seem so productive to simply survive.

Like I don’t get it.

I don’t fucking get it.

But that was my problem is I was doing all this shit

and I thought that by living healthy that I was like accomplishing something.

But I wasn’t accomplishing shit toward the goals I actually had

and the changes I actually wanted to make.

Like I was doing so many things in the day

that were actually not producing an outcome for the changes I wanted to see.

So that’s really my first tip.

My biggest fucking tip if you want to make a change,

look at your like daily actions you take

and get very clear on the direct actions you’re taking

to create the changes that you want to make.

So whatever your goal is, look at the actions you’re taking daily.

And as soon as you do this, you’re going to realize

you’re not even doing like a quarter of what you thought you were doing.

You’re not actually being a quarter of as productive

as you thought you were being toward achieving your goal.

You’re doing so much other fluffy bullshit

that everybody is making seem like cool.

Like going to the gym is not like an accomplishment to me anymore

because yeah, I want to look a certain way.

I want to stay healthy. Great.

But that’s not going to help me move.

That’s not going to help me make an income.

That’s not going to help me change my fucking life.

That’s literally just maintenance of my human body

to not die and to look cute.

Like eating, drinking fucking water, sleeping.

That’s just basic survival to me.

Hygiene, I don’t look at that as being productive anymore.

Because I used to put that shit on my to-do list.

Like, oh, it’s all over my to-do list.

My to-do list is fucking huge.

But when I looked at my to-do list after I had this new mindset,

I was like, girl, you ain’t actually doing shit to get toward your goals.

Like you’re doing all this fluff and it’s making you feel productive.

But you’re not actually being productive

because you’re not actually moving toward your goal.

You’re just doing a bunch of shit.

So I had to get very clear on what I was actually doing

for the goal I wanted to achieve.

And by realizing all this other shit that I was doing

that took up space and took time away

from what I actually could be doing to work on things

became very clear and I started knocking that shit out.

Like eating, I don’t make eating a big deal.

I meal prep, I have my meals, I fucking eat them and I keep going.

And there’s a lot of other things I’ve done to simplify my life.

I still make sure I get everything done I need to get done

for my life and surviving as a human. I get it.

We have certain things we want to do, of course.

Make time for it, do it, get it done.

But don’t look at that as being productive.

So what I had to do is completely change my mindset

where basic survival I no longer perceive

and I no longer look at as being productive.

So if something is just considered surviving,

I don’t make it seem like it’s productive.

I just make that a given.

I make that my baseline expectation

of what I expect myself to do for myself as a living human being.

So doing that leaves me at the end of the day

with an urge to do more, to accomplish more

and to know and be aware

I’m not actually doing shit toward my goals.

So if I want to actually create change,

I need to make a whole other list

of all the things that I could be doing

to work toward whatever it is I want to work toward.

Then I’m going to feel more confident that changes are coming

because I can clearly see the impact they’re having.

But when you just have a long list of shit

and you’re not mentally clear about what’s accomplishing what,

you’re going to feel very productive.

You’re going to feel like you have a lot of things to do.

You’re going to be overwhelmed. You’re going to feel tired.

But you’re not going to see results

because all that shit’s lost in translation, basically.

So that’s a really big step

is knock out all this glamorization of basic survival

and human shit.

Like, people, I swear to God, y’all,

these TikToks piss me off.

The shit that people post online

of their daily routines is honestly

my version of fucking hell.

Like, them being up in the Skyrise apartments

with the perfect fucking, like,

furniture and the perfect bed

and the nice city view

and they go to the perfect gym

and their perfect little outfit

and nothing is dirty and everything is just perfect.

Like, that’s my personal version of fucking hell

with their lemon water.

I’m sorry, but waking up in the morning and drinking hot lemon water

is like drinking stomach acid.

Fuck that shit. I’ll do cold water.

If I have the energy to throw the lemon in it,

I will. But fuck a lemon.

Like, girl, I’m busy.

Let me hit my water, my vitamins, and let me go brush my teeth

and fucking get on with my goddamn day.

I’m not trying to cut up no fucking lemon and boil some water.

Like, girl, I have shit to do.

But yeah, that’s my version of fucking hell.

Like, the perfect life in the Skyrise apartment

and, like, having the Tesla

and going to the perfect gym

and, like, all your appearances.

Like, ugh. Like, the whole living perfectly like that

makes me fucking cringe.

Like, I hate it.

Like, when I move into my fucking apartment in Houston,

I’m literally gonna have a mattress on the floor

and, like, no fucking furniture. I don’t want shit.

Like, I can afford to buy it.

Like, I have my savings. I’m okay.

I can afford to buy furniture and shit. I just don’t want it.

Like, I want it to look a little grunge.

I want it to look a little, like, real.

I don’t want it to look fake

because I’m living in a fucking prop studio.

I genuinely have no urge to buy shit.

Like, I don’t.

I really don’t give a flying fuck.

Like, I want a fake plant.

I want a mattress on the floor.

Maybe a couch and maybe some bar stools.

But, girl, with my kitchen appliances,

I’m gonna splurge as fuck.

Air fryer, Keurig, goddamn Dyson vacuum.

I’m gonna have all the nice shit.

Like, anything I need, I’m gonna buy it.

But when it comes to, like, decorating the furniture

and making things look pretty, eh, I’m good.

I want it to be functional.

And a mattress on the floor is just fucking fine.

I have a weird obsession with that.

Like, I just want my mattress on the fucking floor.

There’s just something about it that, like,

ugh, like, I just don’t have to take life seriously.

Like, it’s just fun.

I’m gonna go run and jump on my fucking mattress on the floor.

Like, I grew up living on pallets.

Like, my grandmother used to always make me pallets in the living room.

And, like, I would just live on the pallet.

And, like, I would just hang out on it.

And it’s like, that’s my adult version of that.

It’s like a mattress on the floor.

I don’t know.

I fucking love it. And everything white.

Everything’s gonna be fucking white if I’m allowed to paint it.

But, I don’t know. We’ll see.

Okay, let me stop talking about all that.

That’s just a whole bunch we don’t need to hear.

But, I’m not someone that’s okay with, like,

wanting something

and not feeling like I’m working toward it.

Like, I’m not able to just set a goal

out in the future

and then just not take actions to it.

You know?

I’m glad these type people

have the time in the day

to make these fucking videos

making their morning routine look like the most

special and aesthetic thing in the world.

Cool. Good for you.

But, we’re the consumer of these videos.

We’re the viewers.

So, I want to make sure that your brain

is not getting fucked up in this.

Doing the pretty shit, making your morning routine

look pretty, it might not actually

be productive. It might be, though.

So, if you want to

continue doing whatever you’re doing, do it.

But, become aware of what’s actually

going to get you toward your goals or not.

Because, at the end of the day, you want to be able

to feel good and feel like you’re moving

toward your goals. That’s a huge

thing, is accountability

and reassurance

that you’re making a difference in your

life. That’s a big thing for me.

And, of course, this can be taken into, like, the toxic

ass hustle culture shit.

But, that’s not what I’m talking

about. The people that listen to my podcast,

y’all fucking get it. You’re aware

enough to not be fucking stupid and

work yourself into the ground. So, even if

you want to do that, do it, bitch.

Humans are capable of handling

so much more than we think. Okay?

We’re not as fucking fragile. And, like,

we don’t need to be babied as much

as people think. Like, what you’re

able to create and do

as a physical human, you could probably

do ten times what you think you’re capable of.

And, that’s the truth.

But, I really, like, sound like one of them

preachy fucking assholes right now. Like,

you just gotta work. You just gotta fucking

grind, bro. Like, I’m

not talking about that, y’all. I promise. I’m just saying

get accountable and get

realistic with what you’re doing. Like,

see the reality of the way you’re living

for the truth of it. Like,

see what is actually going on. And,

if you’re confused why you’re not achieving shit,

look at what you’re doing

to work toward it.

But, my next tip with all this is

when you make the list of what you’re

gonna do daily,

make a list of actions

you can take. Because

human beings are conscious

creators. We are here on this

earth to create.

If you are not creating shit

and creating change

and causing, like, ripples

in, like, the water,

you’re, like, not

fucking fulfilling what you’re supposed

to be doing. Like, that’s what

we’re here for. People get fucked up

when they try to suppress and do

not act on their creative ability

and their creative, like, what’s it called?

Energy. Like, we’re meant to create.

We’re not meant to fucking manifest. Shut up

with the whole manifestation shit and get

based in real life for a second.

And, like, look at what you’re doing everyday

to create what you want. So,

make a list of things you can do

daily to help create

and bring about what it is you want.

Like, you’re meant to create it.

Not mindlessly just think happy

thoughts and manifest it.

Not fucking air quotes around

manifest. I don’t like that whole idea

of it. I used to be very into it,

but it just made me fucking lazy and hopeful

and let me down because nothing was fucking working.

Because we’re meant to create

it. We’re meant to do it. Not

think about it and envision it

and picture it and buy crystals.

Like, yeah, all those things are great, but that’s

not it.

The biggest part of it is conscious

action and conscious creation.

So, yeah,

make your list of action steps that you can do

so that you can also reassure yourself.

That’s what I use these lists for. I’m a very

big, like, list maker.

Because I can look at it and reassure

myself, okay, this is fine. Because when I get

emotional and upset, it’s hard to think

logically. So, if you can have something

in front of you, like a notebook or something

written on paper, it’s sitting in front of you.

You can look at it, even when you’re emotional

and reassure yourself. There’s no fighting it.

Like, if the actions are directly going to get

you where you want to go, and you’re upset,

and you’re feeling like you’re not doing enough,

you can clearly look at the paper and reassure yourself

you’re doing great. You’re doing fine.

Okay? Now cool it. Cry,

let it out, and then fucking get it together.

Okay, so I’m gonna take a

second to get off, like, the fucking preachy

shit and get into, like, the emotional

side of it and believing

in yourself that you are able

to make a change or to change

your life. So, if

you were like me in the beginning of this, when I was

talking about how I was, where I felt

powerless to make changes in my life,

you’re gonna have to do something drastic

to prove

to yourself you do have control

over things. You do have control over your

life. You can at any moment

choose to do whatever you fucking want.

And that is so

important. If you don’t feel

like you’re able to make a change,

and you don’t feel like something is in your control,

it is very important to you

for you to do something big

to disrupt shit, to show

hey, I can

create change. You need to prove that to

yourself. So, I don’t care what

it is, but that’s one

thing that’s really big, is, like, to create

a shift from hell. Like, that’s

why I’m running away and changing my life right now.

Like, I’m literally running away to Houston soon,

and when this episode releases, I’ll be

in Houston looking at apartments. I’m recording this

early, before Sunday.

But, I need to prove to myself

I can create a change.

A big part

of that, because a lot of people are like, financially

they let things hold them back.

So, you don’t need to

make a change where you need to risk

finances, but I did, because

I kept telling myself,

oh, I’ll move once I can make

$5,000 a month

relatively passively, or I can figure

out something that I can do, and make at least

$5,000 a month. That’s what I would feel comfortable

moving out and living normal with.

So, I was telling myself, until

I can make $5,000 a month, I’m not moving.

And, that’s why I have not moved

for the last year, because I’ve been wanting to

move since May of 2021.

But, trying to live like that

like, beat me down.

And it pushed me up against the fucking wall of

powerlessness, because I was like,

I can’t seem to create

this amount of money for myself

without being fucking miserable.

So, I was looking at it like,

if I want to move out,

I have to go work a fucking

job I hate, in order

to make the money. So, what

I told myself was,

fuck the money. Like, I’m now at a

point where I was up against the wall

of such deep hopelessness.

I was like, I don’t

give a fuck about

the money anymore. I’m not gonna

allow the money to keep me trapped

and make it be justification

for why I can’t leave. I need

to feel like I can change my life. I’m

gonna fucking do it. I’m moving.

I’m at a place where I’m so fucking

hopeless, I don’t give a shit.

I’m gonna fucking just move, and I will

figure the fuck out. But I’m proving to

myself, I can make a fucking change

and I can change my life.

And a big thing that that came from

was from starting

to care about the way that I feel.

So, I preach that in all my episodes, and I will preach

it forever, until the fucking day I die.

Caring how I feel

is what has led me

here, to finally have the courage to say

fuck it, I don’t care. Because


do not enjoy my life.

I am not okay with living the life

that I’m living right now. I no longer want

to live it. So,

I look at the way that I’m feeling, and

I’m going to take myself into consideration.

I’m going to care

that I’m unhappy with my life.

And do what I can to get myself out of it.

And do what I can to change it.

I’m not gonna make

myself try to become okay

with living a life I don’t wanna live.

And that’s my biggest point with this podcast


do not try to make yourself become

okay with something you’re not okay with.

Put your energy instead

into trying to change it

or flip it.

Because I’ve tried.

I’ve tried to become okay

with living here and living at home with my dad

and living in Pensacola, but

I keep coming up against the same

wall of hopelessness, but this time

I’m approaching it differently. I’m done

trying to make myself become

okay because I have an easy life here

and I don’t pay rent. I can live for fucking free

with my dad and everything’s fine.

I can logically see

how anyone else in my position would be

happy to have this, but

for me personally, I want more.

I don’t know what I want, but I know I want

more. I want different. And that’s

okay. It doesn’t have

to make sense to anybody else. It doesn’t even

have to make sense to me. All I have

to fucking do is follow the way that I feel about

it. If it doesn’t feel right, if I

don’t fucking like it and I’m not happy being

here, I’m going to say, okay

me, scoop myself up and we’re

going to go make a fucking change. I’m getting the

fuck out of here. I’m not going to try

to force myself to stay here where

I’m unhappy and force myself to stay

somewhere I’m not okay.

Mentally, this place is fucking

killing me.

There’s so many reasons I want to move to a bigger city

and get the fuck out of this place,

but that’s not really the point of this episode.

So my

whole spiel came to that

with caring about

the way that you feel. And if you’re uncomfortable,

caring that you’re uncomfortable

and caring that you’re unhappy

and caring that you wake up every

day feeling fucking hopeless.

Okay. I only let that last for

three days. Like I hit this one wall

of hopelessness like last week

and I thought it would just

like go away or I thought I could kick it

or I thought I could continue

with like doing my lives and

helping people and I just, it wouldn’t

go away. That lingering just like hopelessness

wouldn’t go away and it was stronger than ever.

And times before

I wasn’t

as strong as I am now to handle it.

I know where it led me and it led me

to a very very bad

fucking place multiple times.

So this time I completely

changed my approach to it.

And this time

I actually care about how I feel

and I’m going to prioritize how I feel.

I’m not letting myself

go through that. I’m not letting that fucking

shit happen to me anymore. I’m not letting

myself stay here.

And I care about myself and the way

that I feel more than I care about

potentially not having money

to pay my fucking bills. Like I have a credit card.

I’ve never been in credit card debt, but I’ll make

it fucking work. I’ll go bartend if I have to.

I’ll go back to nursing. I literally

will figure it the fuck out. But all I know


I gotta prioritize me.

So that’s something that’s

really gonna help all of you

make a change is when you shift

your energy from making

yourself feel comfortable with something

you’re not comfortable with into

looking for the ways you can change it and bring about

change. Like that’s gonna

completely flip everything.

And I never thought I’d

make it out of here. I’m gonna

be really honest. I didn’t

think I’d ever make it out.

And this is the mindset shift

that has made it

possible and I’m

actually getting out. So

I wanted to make sure I shared

it because this is the most

life-changing thing that I’ve ever


One more thing I

want to ramble about off the

emotional track is

consistency. So

if you’re gonna make a change or you’re

gonna try to do something different and you’re gonna change

your daily routine, set a time

limit. Set a date for how long you’re gonna

do it first. Like that’s a

really, really important fucking thing. Alright?

I promise. I know it sounds a little nuts

but as long as there’s

an end date for when you’re

gonna stop doing the things you’re doing, it helps

you do them longer. It helps you

do them better. Okay? And it helps

you feel like a little bit more hopeful. So if

you’re like, okay, I’m gonna do these action

steps every day for the next 30 days

and then I’m gonna see how my life changes and

I’m gonna make a whole new list of what I’m gonna start doing.

Give yourself the

30 days or 60 days or however long you

want it to be. And then work

toward it and do it for those 60 days.

Commit to that time frame

and then you can reassess

and change what you’re

doing. But when you’re trying to make a change

and you keep fucking switching directions

every 3-4 days or every week

you’re trying to do new shit, it’s like, no, no, no.

Just do what you said you were gonna do

for the time limit that you

set and then keep

going. Because you have to do things consistently

to see, like, improvements

or changes. You know, you can’t just do something

once and be like, oh, all good. Like, where’s the change at?

Unless it’s something drastic

or like, you get what I fucking mean. It’s not like cutting your hair

or it’s like you cut it once and it’s cut.

It’s like, working out.

You gotta fucking keep going. It sucks.

And I fucking hate it. But I love it at the same time.

But I do want to

tell you that the confidence

and the

like, genuine

happiness you will feel

when you show yourself

that you do have control over

things and you can and will

change your reality.

Bitch. It’s like, the best

feeling I’ve ever felt. And

I literally fucking like, bawled my eyes

out about it like an hour and a half before I

recorded this. Like, I was supposed to record this earlier

and I’m about to be late to my haircut.

But, girl, I just had to fucking let it

out. Like, I couldn’t stop crying.

Like, I was just so happy. Like, genuinely

just so fucking happy

and proud of myself and I felt

supported in a way I’ve

never felt supported before because I had

my back. I wasn’t gonna let

myself stay here

and be upset anymore. It’s like,

I had my own back

and the more that I’m exposing

to myself that I can create changes,

the more that I’m trusting myself

and believing that I’m in good hands.

Like, I feel like I’m in good hands with myself

because, like, I’ll do

what it fucking takes and I’ll make it work.

And feeling safe

with yourself is

shit. I can’t fucking describe a single

thing that feels better. Like, I would rather

feel safe with myself


have ten million dollars.

Honest to fucking God. Because feeling

unsafe with yourself, nothing is worth that.

Nothing is fucking worth that. And money can’t

buy that. You have to build that. You have to create that.

You have to show yourself that you have your own fucking back

and you’re not gonna let yourself be miserable.

I hope after listening to this episode

you feel a little bit better about whatever

change you’re trying to make. I hope you feel

inspired. I hope you feel prepared and ready

and, like, hopeful a little bit.

But I really just wanted to make sure

I shared all this with you guys. Because it

really helped me and I think it will really help you.

If you like this podcast

I just have one request and it’s

that you go leave me a five star rating.

Thank you so much.

If you want to keep up with me, all of my social media

will be linked in the description of this podcast.

Also, if you are interested

in one-on-one coaching with me,

I have now created an application

process so it’s no longer just free to

schedule. I’m doing applications

now to keep up with the demand because it

just got too high. So now I’m screening people

basically to see who’s a good fit

and who’s not. Because I want to work

with action takers. I want to work

with people that are serious about transforming

their life. Because the shit that I say

y’all know. That’s what it’s for.

And where I specialize

is with the people that have been

looking for answers they can’t find

and the people that have been trying shit

and it’s just not working.

I’m the person that those people can go to.

So, if you’re interested

in that, I will put the link to the

application in the description box also.

And I want to make it very clear

that you’ve already

got what it takes to get through

what you’re dealing with or to improve your life

or to reach your goals. And I’ll

help you see that. And it’s gonna be a lot

easier when you got me in your corner.

Because that’s exactly how I want it to feel.

I want it to feel like you have someone that has your back

and like I’m in your corner. Cause that’s

what it is. Like I’m there for you and I’m

there to do shit with you.

But anyways, thank you so much for

listening. Please stay safe

and take care of yourself. And I will talk

to you next Sunday.