I've Had It - The Slobification of America

🎁Amazon Prime 📖Kindle Unlimited 🎧Audible Plus 🎵Amazon Music Unlimited 🌿iHerb 💰Binance

I would like to welcome everyone to this very special bonus content episode with myself,


And I’m Angie.

We call her Pumps of I’ve Had It Podcast.

And for those of you that follow us on Instagram, you may have seen several days ago where Pumps

reveals to me that she has been feeding her dog grapes.


First of all, backup.

I did say he liked grapes.

I didn’t say I was feeding him to him all the time.

I did get some grapes.

I gave him one because he was bugging me about it.

And I thought, well, he’s not going to want this.

And then he liked him.

It was on one occasion.

And I gave him probably 10 or something, but that was two weeks ago.

He’s not dying.

He’s fine.

Thank you for confirming what I just said.

I know, but you make it sound like I feed him that all the time.

Like, hey, wake up.

Here’s your grapes.

Listener, as I was saying, we aired on Instagram that Pumps likes to feed her dog grapes.

And I knew that the internet would go bananas, as the internet always does, especially when

it involves the health, safety, and well-being of one of our little furry friends.

And those of you that have followed us for many years know that I am a fucking five-star

pet owner.

I crush it.

You might even be jacked up to fucking crazy-ass pet owner.

Like I said, I crush it in the pet-owning department.

Pumps struggles.

I struggled with one dog.

You are a terrible pet owner.

That’s a lie.

And when I posted this about you feeding the dog grapes to get the internet in a frenzy,

it worked like a charm.

And I just want to share with the listener one of the comments that came in.

And it’s from 1K Davis.

And she says, I remember watching her with her dogs on TV, and I thought, that woman

should not have dogs ever.

The grapes further confirmed my thoughts.

To which I automatically responded, cap lock, exactly.

I could bore you and the listener by going through all several hundred of these comments

that confirm that you’re a bad pet owner, that you shouldn’t feed your dog grapes, but

I don’t want to belabor the point.

I know you would hate that, but I just want to go on record.

I’m not a terrible pet owner.

I walk him every day at least a mile, hopefully two.

He gets ice water.

He doesn’t like tap water.

He likes it to be cold.

So he gets ice water.

He sleeps with me.

We hang out all the time.

So that’s not a terrible pet owner.

Well, I mean, there are some things that I could point out, like the time that your other

dog ran away and you celebrated it, and then it ran back home, and you were just pissed

that it came back home, and then you kind of like encouraged it to run away again and

then celebrated that.

I did not like that dog.

He made Blaze crazy.

He made me crazy.

I could not be happier that he has found a new home.

We don’t know that he’s found a new home.

Yes, we do, because he’s chipped.

The people called me from the vet, but they didn’t want to leave.

They wanted to do like no caller ID, so my phone never rang.

And so they have him.

He’s chipped.

He could bring him home if they want.

So you do know for a fact, true serum and a polygraph, that that dog is with a family?

Well, no, I don’t know exactly with a polygraph, but wouldn’t they notify me if he died?

He ran away the second time.

You didn’t know where he went.

But anyway, this is-

I think he went back to the same people who had him the first time.

Operative word there, think.

Here’s the deal.

Everybody’s life is easier that Scout is out of it.

That’s just, I’m going to stand on that.


All right.

Well, if anybody would like to weigh in on at I’ve Had It Instagram about the orphan

that used to be Pumps’ dog, please feel free to do so.

Until then, let’s have Kylie play for us the comments from you, the listener, telling us

what you’ve had it with.

The first one is Samantha D.


I’ve had it with old people.

I love old people, but who the fuck gave them cell phones?

They go to restaurants, they turn everything on their speakerphone, they play games.

If I hear this bitch in the restaurant pop one more bubble on her game, I’m going to

lose my mind.

First of all, I love Samantha’s accent.

Love it.

Rock solid.

Isn’t it funny?

I mean, these cell phone etiquette is a problem.

It’s a huge problem, and I think the boomers are some of the biggest offenders.


I was thinking more the younger, but it probably is the boomers.

It’s the boomers.

The younger people don’t want to ever draw attention to themselves.

They’re kind of buried in their phones, but it’s not noisy, they’ve got earpods in.

These boomers are awful at technology and at phones.


The speakerphone, anytime you’re in public, you can’t do it.

No, it’s bad.

It’s bad.

It is terrible.

Samantha, I could not agree more.

And I love, especially love how you started off the, I’ve had it with, I’ve had it with

these old people, comma, I love old people.

That kind of crazy contradiction, I get that with every group, because I kind of like have

totally had it with boomers.

I’m sick to death of them.

But there are several boomers that I obviously love, like pumps.

You are the biggest bitch on planet earth, and I’m not even lying.

When you turn 50, I can’t, I’m going to take the next two years figuring out how I’m going

to torture you.

No, actually the next 18 months.

Do you know what’s going to be so great about when I turn 50?


You’re still going to be older.

I know, but I mean, look how good I look for 60.

For those of you that are just tuning in, pumps is actually very much older than me.

Four years.

It’s not very much.

Are you 52?

I’m 52.


But I’ll be 53 at the end of the month.

Oh, so it’s four and a half years.

Only for six months.

It’s at four and a half years.

It would always be four and a half years.

No, but I’m just saying normally it’s just four years.

Right now it’s four and a half, but once August rolls around, it’ll just be four years again.

No, but the timeframe, the four months would always be the same.

No, I know.

But I’m just saying that you’re not that much younger than me.

I don’t care how the math clicks out.

I don’t care how the math clicks out.

This is a true statement.

Jennifer is younger than pumps.

That is true, but this is a true statement.

Angie is so much nicer and prettier than Jennifer.

That’s probably true.

That probably is true.

Samantha, I agree with you.

I’ve had it.

I’ve had it with the speakerphone calls and I’ve kind of had it with boomers and how dumb

they are on Facebook.

It’s just, you know, they’re all juiced up on Fox News and Tucker Carlson ready to like

light the world on fire.

I’ve had it.


You ready for the next one?

Ready for the next one.

I think you’re really going to like this one, Jennifer.


Pumps, I don’t think you’re going to like it at all.



This is Ashley H.

I have had it with Stanley Cups.

I was talking to a mom at drop off and I asked her what she got for her birthday and she

said a Stanley Cup and I didn’t know what they were at the time and I asked her, you

must really be into hockey then and she laughed at me and showed me an Instagram feed of people

with their Stanley Cups.

A sippy cup is not a fashion accessory.

I have had it.

Guilty and I’m just going to go on record that the Stanley Cup is the greatest invention

of all time over electricity, automobiles.

It is the single greatest invention of our day.


All right.

Here’s what we’re going to do.

I’m going to go turn off all the breakers at your house.

And then I’m going to take your car keys.

But I’m going to leave you inside that house with your fucking Stanley Cup.

And I’m also going to have your cell phone too since you know electricity and we’ll see

how long you love that Stanley Cup.

I just think it’s funny that people are so dramatically opposed to the Stanley Cup.

For the record, I took two pictures last week at basketball games, both of them I had my

Stanley Cup in it.

Thanks for letting me and the listener know about your photographic habits.

I’ve had it with the Stanley Cups.

I’ve had it with people constantly having to put a beverage in their mouth all the time

and take it with them everywhere.

What happened where we could sit down, have a drink, have something to eat, then get up

like normal people and abstain from drinking or eating for like 30, 45 minutes.

It’s not that big of an ask.

It is just not that big of an ask to ask people to quit schlepping their goddamn Stanley Cups

and slurping on them in the lipstick stains.

I have had it up to my eyeballs from top to bottom.

Fuck you, Stanley.

Oh my God.

I love Stanley.

Love Stanley.


I think it’s just so fantastic.

I’ve had it that people cannot go an hour without consuming something.

It disgusts me.

You’re such a fucking bitch.

It’s unbelievable.

Did you hear that real good?

I was out of my Stanley.

Oh my God, Ashley, I’m with you.

I’m with you.

I think on your 50th birthday, I’ll try to get you a big round of Stanleys.

That’s nice.

Thank you so much.

Thank you.

Kylie, who’s next?

We’ve got Molly P.


Hello, ladies.

The things that I have had it with are pajama pants with the shower shoes and socks in public.

No one wants to see that.

Obviously you haven’t washed your ash for the day and it’s just the slobification of


So I’ve had it.


That’s a great one.

I agree.

I completely agree.

I completely agree with the slobification of America.

We were just talking about that in the last I’ve had it, the one prior to you where everybody

has to carry a goddamn giant beverage around with them all the time in their pajamas, which

pumps has no issue going out in public in her pajamas and she wears slippers all the

time to the filming of this podcast.

She can’t even put on normal shoes.

Today you have a normal shoes, but I mean, a lot of times you’re in your slippers.


Sometimes I wear my slippers out, but I’m like, if I come here or I mean, I’m not like

going to the mall in my slippers and pajama pants.

I mean, I’m not saying I’ve never done it because I’m sure I have at some point, but

I do notice when the kid, when my kids wear pajama bottoms and the slides with socks,

I’m always asking him like, why weren’t you just get dressed?


My son Dylan, he wears, he’ll wear like pajama bottoms out.

And I’m just like, what do I do as a parent?

How do I end this?

Because you know, you have to pick your battles because I’m like, okay, it’s really not that

big of a deal.

He’s a good person.

He makes good grades.


But I mean, sometimes I just want to be like, pull yourself together.

Well, but I think a lot of them that age do that.

I think it’s like normal.

Like they go somewhere and everybody’s in pajama bottoms.

Here’s the deal.

You’re running up to seven 11.

I’m going to give that a pass.


The airport?


And it’s, there are people wearing pajamas on airplanes now.

And it all started when the airlines quit dressing the flight attendants cute.

They used to have these cute skirts and little cute hats and they kind of had these little,

you know, like little scarves around their necks.

It’s just gone downhill since they’ve taken away the cute airline stewardess outfits.

Flight attendant.

Flight attendant.


Do you think it’s okay for flight attendants to call them a stewardess?

I think so.

I can’t keep up.


It’s just, it’s bad.

It’s bad.

I do like this.

She said this about the bat.

That was funny.

It’s just, it’s a mental picture I don’t want.


Thanks for reminding us pumps.


Kylie, who’s next?

The last one is from Rachel.


You know what?

I have had it with these bicycle posses.

There’s just a ginormous group of people riding bicycles just in the road.

You have a bike lane.

Why are you in the middle of the road?

I’m pretty sure that the tight pants and the seat going up the crack of their ass is messing

with their brain power.

Someone help them please.

Rachel, I completely agree.

And I almost got into a huge fight with a bicyclist.



So I’m driving to a hair appointment.

And listener, I hate being late.

Like it stresses me out.

I would rather be 30 minutes early than two minutes late.

Like it completely stresses me out if I’m running late because I take into account the

person’s feelings that I’m meeting.

So unlike other people that co-host a podcast with me, that’s neither here nor there.

I’m driving down the road and there’s a bicyclist.

There’s probably a posse of them.

And so nobody’s coming in the oncoming lane.

So I go around them, hit a red light.

And they’re kind of at this point kind of catching up.

And then I’m about to make a right turn.

And as I’m turning, the guy that I passed is so mad at me, I guess because I passed

him, but I passed him legally.

He hits my car, yeah, with his hand, not the bike, but he like, as he passes, he slaps

my car and he’s like, fuck you.

And I’m just like, okay, first and foremost, this is what happens when you get on the road,



You get passed.

Sometimes you pass people, sometimes you get passed.

It’s just a part of driving.

And if you enter the road on a bike, sometimes you’re going to get passed and sometimes you’re

going to do the passing.

It’s just a foregone conclusion.

Why on earth this motherfucker was so butthurt that I passed him, I just, I don’t understand


I don’t understand that either.

And I think the biggest issue in regard to the bicyclers is when men wear those stupid

bike shorts and their package, like you can see it from the bike and I’m just like, disgusting.

Those should be outlawed.

Pump the brakes.

You can see their package from the bike?

When they’re stopped at a stop sign, they like put their feet on the ground or one foot

on the ground.

And I look back and it’s just like a row of like men in bike shorts, which is just gross.

You’re not answering my question.

I mean, do I see their wieners?


The outline.

The package.

You see the outline of the package.

Yes, you can see the outline of the package.

So the answer to your question is yes.



Next question is when you see men on bikes, you’re looking in between their legs.

No, I’m looking in my rear view mirror to make sure I’m not going to run over one.

And I noticed they’re standing there and they have this bulge.

And you see the package in the rear view mirror.


So, I mean, I’ve never noticed this.


At stop signs, they’ll like hop off.

I think you’re probably, maybe there’s some well hung cyclists around you or something.

You know what I should have done when I saw that is ask for his number.

I mean, look at Eagle Eye over here sniffing out penis sizes of the cyclists.


I don’t know if it was big or small.

I just thought, why the fuck are you wearing that?

Like it looks terrible.

I wear those because it’s the friction of the seats back and forth.

It makes perfect sense why they wear them.

It’s like, why does a scuba diver wear the scuba suit?

And because your thighs are rubbing back and forth on that seat.

So you want the fabric to be taut.

That to me makes perfect sense.

I just think it looks awful.

Well, I mean, I just didn’t know.

I didn’t know you were such a package girl, but you know, I just run around all day looking

for bicyclists.

You learn stuff about people every day.

Even people you’ve been friends with for 25 years.

You learn new stuff about them.

Watch the bicyclers at a stop sign.

Everyone will notice.

Oh, I’m going to.


I’m going.

That’s a good tip.

Is it?

What about the girls?

Can they wear the tight breeches?


Because it’s just like short legging.

So it’s just the penis that offends you.


Just the package.

Like, ugh.

We don’t need to see that.


I honestly have never seen it.


We’ll have to run around to the bike lanes.


Get your binoculars, eagle eye.

I’ll spot them out.


Maybe we can write a report and submit it here on at I’ve Had It podcast.



Good idea.

You know what I’ve started doing?

It’s kind of a total Gen Xer move.

Instead of saying I’ve Had It podcast, I’m saying the Instagram name at I’ve Had It podcast.

It’s because you’re so much younger than me.

I just call it I’ve Had It.

At pumps, pumps, pumps.


Without further ado, I think this will conclude our bonus content.

If you would like to be featured with some petty grievance that you have, please DM us

a voice memo to at I’ve Had It podcast on Instagram.

And also, please take time to go to our Instagram page and talk to pumps about being a good

pet owner.

Oh my God.

I hate you.

I literally hate you.

Thank you so much.

I love you.

I hate you.

See you next Tuesday.

I’ve had it with that.

I’ve had it.

Had it.

Had it.

Had it.