I've Had It - Boom, There’s My Ex-Wife

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So are we supposed to start the podcast?

Ready?

Okay.

Better.

Okay.

How are you?

I’m good.

How are you?

It feels like it’s been a year.

I know.

You went to the Grand Caymans.

You went to Paris and London.

Paris and London.

And we were separated for like eight days.

I was very, very sad.

I think I did text you halfway through and I was like, I’m embarrassed to tell you that

I miss you.

You did.

You texted me on like day four and it was really sweet.

I know.

It warmed my cold black heart like you wouldn’t believe.

Cold black heart.

So Pumps, what have you had it with?

What I’ve had it with, Jennifer, is universal and that is personal space invaders.

Oh yeah.

I don’t understand as an adult, particularly if you’re married and or have children, how

that continues to be a problem.

Because my children, if I were in people’s faces like that, would tell me, back the fuck

up.

Like get back.

You’re too close.

But I have people that like, as I start moving back-

Hang on.

I’m kind of confused.

Are you talking about your children invading your personal space?

No.

I’m saying like as somebody that has a child, if I were a personal space invader, they would

shoo my ass.

I mean, there’s one in particular that I’m thinking of that, I mean, I have backed up

and backed up and she keeps coming and she keeps coming and I’m like backed up against

the wall.

Right.

And I just want to throw my hands up and be like, I surrender.

Like get out of my face.

No, it’s bad.

I just don’t understand how people can not realize their personal space invaders, especially

if the person you’re talking to keeps backing up.

I mean, subtly, but you’re backed up and then all of a sudden I’m up against a wall and

I mean, we could French kiss, we’re so close.

It drives me crazy.

And in fact, when I see this person, I like try to hide.

No, that’s what happens.

It’s almost like it’s like for the personal space invader, it’s like the self-fulfilling

prophecy that they have that nobody wants to be around them.

And then they start inching closer, inching closer, and then they make it come true.

You know what I mean?

Because they manifest it.

They manifest it because I have people that are around me from time to time in business

that are total personal space invaders.

And here’s the biggest offender of all, personal space invader plus chronic halitosis.

That is the worst.

These people are the worst.

It is so bad and everybody in the world knows this.

And I don’t know, again, why isn’t somebody close to them telling them, A, you have chronic

halitosis.

Chew gum, get a mint.

I’m very good about asking people if we’re in close quarters, like if we’re in a car

and we’re traveling and we’re talking, like, oh my God, is my breath bad?

Just tell me and I’ll put a mint in or something.

So the people with the chronic halitosis, again, why aren’t the people that live with

them, their nearest and dearest, i.e. kids, husbands, wives, telling them?

Maybe they’ve just given up.

Maybe it’s like, you know.

Do you think Roman Welch would give up on you if you were in people’s faces everywhere

he went with your horrible breath?

No.

And I’m not saying you have horrible breath.

I’m just saying.

I’m just saying that I think sometimes some people are so set in their ways that you get

to a point where you just throw your hands up in the air and it’s like, I can’t fix this.

I’ll give you a prime example.

Josh Welch talking about his hair 24-7, 365.

I can’t make him stop.

I’ve tried.

I’ve tried very – I’m like, okay, you got a haircut.

Let’s move on.

When we were in Paris, he got his haircut.

We had to hear about it building up to the haircut, after the haircut, and at least three

to five times per day post haircut for the remainder of our vacation.

So I have just given up on this.

But wouldn’t you think that like if you had bad breath –

Logically, yes, but they’re still out there.

So I’m offering a – I guess it just defies logic.

It defies logic.

I agree with 100% of everything you say.

I think these people, the chronic halitosis personal space invaders, should not be allowed

to leave the house.

Yet they are.

They’re out there.

They’re in there.

They’re leaving, and you’ve got some gal backing you up to a wall that’s trying to

French kiss you.

Nobody’s telling her to stay at home.

So I don’t understand a lot of what goes on with the general public, which is why I have

become more and more agoraphobic as my life has gone on.

But the personal space invaders plus chronic halitosis and then, you know, like sometimes

somebody has like a booger.

I always tell when people have boogers.

You do.

You always tell people.

I always tell if people’s pants are unzipped.

They have food in their teeth.

Like even if I don’t know them, I’m like, hey, girlfriend, food in your teeth.

I just think that that’s being a good person.

The person that lets you run around with lipstick on your teeth or your fly unzipped, that’s

not a good person.

I agree.

I’ll never ever tell you one time I was at DHS or juvenile court, which I don’t practice

in juvenile court very much.

And I have no idea what’s going on because everybody that’s there like works in the building.

It’s a rarity for like a private attorney to be out there.

So I’m out there prancing around like, you know, the princess of the legal community.

And the clerk, the judge goes off the bench for a minute and the clerk comes, says, Ms.

Sullivan, can I see you in the back?

And I was like, oh God, I fucked something up.

I’ve done something wrong.

Like what is going on?

So I go back there and she goes, your fly is unzipped.

Which thank you.

Yeah.

That was a thank you.

That was a public service.

Yes.

That was really helpful.

So I think the question is, what do we do moving forward?

I think what we could make a pact to do, you, me, Kylie, and the listener, is when somebody

is personal space invading, is immediately say, stop invading my personal space.

And if you have a personal space invader plus chronic halitosis, you can double down on

that and say, you need to back up and you need to go scrape your tongue, brush your

teeth, rinse with Listerine, visit the dentist, and then circle back with me.

Yes.

And then I’ll be happy to hear what you have to say.

Exactly.

So maybe we just need to be more blunt.

Maybe we’re not blunt enough.

No.

I would never say, oh, my God, you’re in my space and your breath is terrible.

I just wouldn’t.

But you just said that you tell anybody if they have something in their mouth, something

in their teeth, something.

I know.

I know.

I do.

But I don’t know why I don’t tell the personal space invader, like, just take a step back.

Yeah.

I don’t know.

I’ll give it some thought.

But I do want to circle back to something you were talking about, the Josh Welts incessant

talking about his haircut.

What are the tips that you use to kind of get that conversation out of the everyday

mainstream?

I completely ignore it.

I mean, I complete he starts talking about his hair and I just completely act like he’s

not speaking.

I don’t feed it at all.

I just completely ignore it.

And he even went as far as to suggest that the haircuts in New York or in Paris are so

superior to those in Oklahoma City that he’s giving strong consideration to flying to New

York once every four to six weeks to get a haircut.

To which my 20-year-old son Dylan said, dad, that is the dumbest, most impractical thing

I’ve ever heard in my life.

Well, I think that I appreciate what Dylan said, but what really should have been said

is you are the biggest fucking entitled brat.

Don’t ever say that out loud again, ever.

Don’t ever say it out loud.

Never.

Well, okay, Kylie.

So now we have some tips on the pickleball.

We’ll just, when the pickleball conversation, Kyle and I are just going to look at each

other.

We’re just going to act like you’re not here.

Do you want to hear what I’ve had it with?

I would love to hear what you’ve had it with.

So the entire eight days that I was in Europe, I paid a lot of attention to the Europeans.

Right.

To the Parisians and the Londoners.

And there was one thing that I never saw, not one time.

And I took the tube, I walked the streets, I did public transportation.

I was out amongst the people all the time.

I’m a much better traveler than I am day-to-day liver in Oklahoma City.

There was one thing I never noticed, not one time.

I think I know what it is.

Can I get to guess?

Do I get to guess?

No.

There is an oversized beverage that you do not see.

These beverages that you schlep around with you everywhere you go, they don’t have that.

You go to a restaurant and if you happen to drink sugary drinks, like a Coke, you get

a small bottle and a glass and there’s no free refill.

Nobody schlepping around these big giant water bottle caps.

And they walk everywhere.

They walk a million times more than we do.

They walk everywhere.

Are you sure no one had a Stanley cap?

Not one fucking person.

I am 100% positive about it.

As I started the story, I paid rock solid attention to those around me and I was looking

for it.

Nobody walks around with beverages.

Well, you know, that’s interesting because when we were in Grand Cayman, I too noticed

that nobody like served big drinks.

You had to ask for a refill, that kind of thing.

But you will be happy to learn that the four girlfriends that I went with, we all took

our Stanley caps with us so that we were able to still enjoy our oversized beverages.

So y’all like took your beverages down there with you and then you took them everywhere

with you on the trip?

I think I was the only one that took it everywhere with me.

But when we would go down to the beach, we all loaded up our Stanleys.

I’m just going to tell you this.

It will be a cold fucking day in hell before I ever am caught dead with a Stanley cap.

It really fucking chaps my hide that you have found a posse that enables this egregious

consumption of yours.

It is to everybody that went to the Grand Cayman with pumps, go eat a bag of dicks because

it’s enabling.

It’s not necessary to drink that much 24-7 nonstop.

I’ve had it, had it, had it, had it.

And as you well know, I take all of my supplies for my tea on all trips.

I’m abundantly aware.

I’m abundantly a listener.

When we travel, we go to Mexico every Thanksgiving together, the minute we check into the hotel

room.

The minute in our hotel room, this is like a house that we rent and it has a kitchen.

She is down there, I mean, just ravaging through the cabinets, finding things to make this

tea and then she has to make the tea and then she refrigerates part of it.

It is so disturbing that you cannot even like just go in and like enjoy the room for a second,

look at the view, look at the swimming pool, kind of look at your bedroom and have a little

conversation.

It is like this fix, like a crackhead that has walked in the Sahara Desert for 500 miles

that just bumped into their crack dealer.

That is what it’s like.

So the fact that you are traveling with others like you, number one, is disturbing, but number

two shows you what an integral part I play in your life to not-

To stand up against the over drinking.

Yes, yes.

That at least there’s somebody in your life that says you don’t need to consume so much

all the goddamn time.

It’s not normal.

It’s uniquely American and it must end.

Okay.

Well, thank you for that.

You’re welcome.

Okay.

I would like to welcome everybody.

Boy, we were worked up on that intro.

You were worked up on that intro.

What about you and the personal space invaders?

Oh, no.

You went on for 10 minutes.

Yours was 10 minutes long.

Mine was five, Missy.

I know.

The personal space invading, it makes me crazy.

Okay.

I would like to welcome everybody to I’ve Had It Podcast.

It is a place where we come to air petty grievances with each other, with others out into the world,

and sometimes with the listener.

That’s right.

So I’m Jennifer.

I’m Ian Sheehy.

We call her Pumps and she is the star of our show.

Kylie is here with us today.

Richard is here with us today.

And we have an in-studio guest.

Which is so exciting.

So listener, for those of you that don’t know, I am an interior designer when I’m not the

co-star to the main star of I’ve Had It Podcast.

The supporting star.

The supporting star.

I am a high-end interior designer and I work with a gentleman named Kyle Bunting who makes

these fabulous cowhide rugs.

And when you hear cowhide, listener, don’t think country and western because that’s not

what this is.

For those of you that watch our TikToks and Instagrams and YouTube, you can see the blue

wallpaper wall behind us.

That is all cowhide made for us by Kyle Bunting.

And I have been doing business with Kyle for over 10 years.

And he has come up to Oklahoma City to do some business with me and to be a guest on

our podcast.

We snagged him to do it.

We need a male perspective.

So let’s get Kyle in here.

Kyle, welcome.

Yes, ma’am.

Thank you.

Thanks for having me.

To Oklahoma City.

My pleasure.

To I’ve Had It Podcast.

Mm-hmm.

So why don’t you tell us, you make these rugs and you sell them all over the world.

Correct.

Can you tell the listener, are there any A-list celebs that you can kiss and tell where it’s

been public?

Absolutely not.

None?

Nope.

I’ve done work for Jen Welch.

That is a D-lister.

That is as far as it’s going to go.

Okay.

What about…

No, she’s not.

She’s a C-lister.

I’m teaser.

Come on.

At least a C-lister.

At least a C-minus.

No, you know how it is.

I mean, that’s kind of part of how this thing works.

What about…

Didn’t you do some for like a bougie retail store in Paris?

No.

You know, I did do something that is public.

It was a stunt rug.

Oh, really?

Oh.

Yeah.

I made a…

The company was on the Kardashians about a decade ago.

Okay.

And the producers called and said, hey, we got this idea.

We’d like to have this domestic disaster.

And our idea is one of the girls drops like a bowl of pasta on the Kyle Bunning carpet

and Chris freaks out and this whole thing.

And they’re like, but we don’t want to destroy the rug.

So what do you think we should do?

So we made a stunt rug.

It was like a small version of the same carpet and they closed up on it and they dumped the

pasta on it and we got a bunch of notoriety from it.

So I have made carpets for the Kardashians.

Okay.

Yeah.

I could talk about that one, but that’s as far as you go.

And I have a famous one because I’ve seen it in the person’s house.

Who?

The Flaming Lips.

Yes.

The chairs you’ve done for the Flaming Lips.

I’ve seen those in person.

They’re amazing.

That’s when I first saw your work because I thought, oh my God, this is nuts.

Yeah.

Thank you.

Yeah.

And we did a carpet for Elton John.

That was my big one.

Oh, yeah.

Did you get to meet him?

And that was published so I can…

No, I never get to meet these people.

Oh, that’s a shame.

But that’s okay.

You know, but all in the game.

Yeah.

So, Kyle and I work in an industry that is basically comprised of women and gay men.

Right?

You think?

Totally.

Yeah.

And Kyle is a good looking guy, lives in Austin, Texas, travels all over the country in Europe.

And Kyle, I have to tell you, so a lot of my friends, because they hear me say, Kyle

Bunting, Kyle Bunting, let’s do a Kyle Bunting rug here, Kyle Bunting wallpaper there.

So, they Google you or they get on your Instagram and they say, does Kyle have a boyfriend?

He’s so cute.

Sure.

Right.

Yeah, never heard that before.

That’s a new one.

Yeah, that happens all the time.

I think that’s just part of the design business.

If you’re reasonably manicured, wake up, maybe take care of yourself a little bit, a little

reverse stereotype maybe.

Right.

Straight guy thinking, you know, thinking he’s a gay guy.

I thought Pumps was gay way before.

But even when we first went to dinner, I just assumed you were gay, I never asked, but I

just assumed.

So, we’re at dinner, you’re manicured, you’re groomed well, cute outfit, good hair, all

of that.

So, I’m thinking 100%.

So, then you start talking about your kids.

I was like, oh, that’s so cool.

He adopted kids, you know, great.

And then it wasn’t until later in the evening, and I think I leaned over to Jennifer, like

dessert was coming.

I was like, so Kyle’s not gay?

She was like, no, Kyle’s not gay.

And I was like, oh, well, I thought he was, but I mean, you thought I was gay.

Does this benefit you out in the dating world?

Listener, Kyle is divorced, single, dad.

Do you think it makes you more approachable to a woman?

Well, it definitely makes me more approachable to a man.

No doubt about that.

It’s like all the time, like, hey, fellas, it’s cool.

Thank you.

Yeah, right.

You know, I don’t know.

I think there might be something to that.

I think it’s the, it might be more about the business that we’re in, like you have something

that women are generally interested in, design and something you can relate to.

And so I think, I think that’s useful.

It’s never hurt to be a designer, but he ever said, God, you know, could you be a fireman

or like a contract or something masculine?

I’m like, you know, I just do design.

So yeah, I think it works.

Josh Welch, who is a friend of yours, is total metrosexual.

So he gets a lot, especially when we were on the TV show, he’ll get this.

I’m getting a gay vibe from Josh.

And I kind of, I personally like a more manicured man that likes to go shopping with me.

I mean, Josh and I love to go shopping.

Pumps is a terrible companion for me to shop.

Let’s get on to Kyle thinking you were gay.

I think this is.

Well, I want to talk, I mean, you know, I’m trying to not wave the gay card, but I’m gonna

talk about shopping.

So you say you’re not gay, but you do like to shop.

Well, it’s kind of like the funny thing, like, I mean, you’re, you’re, these are like

interesting stereotypes, right?

Like that we carry and we think we’ve shed them all.

But that’s kind of a, what are you like a little under the radar one?

Because for me, it’s, I like to shop because I like to see, you know, what’s happening

in design and fashion and what’s forward.

And I’m touching textiles and fabrics, you know, and thinking about where it comes from.

And that’s kind of part of the game, you know, that we’re in.

You need to know these things and be in front of it.

And it just happens to be, you know, nice to buy pretty things too.

I know.

I love.

I am.

I’m addicted to buying bags for.

Like man purses?

Kyle, recently.

No, the women, if I, the relationships that I’m in, I’m in a, I’m a real good.

You get bags, you get all sorts of great stuff.

Listener and Pumps and Kylie, Kyle sent me a Christmas gift and I’m very difficult to

shop for because I make my own money and I buy what I want when I want to.

And I don’t have to ask anybody for permission.

Right.

I get, if I want something, I can go buy it.

And so Kyle sends me this gift and I’m like, oh, that poor soul.

I open it up and it is this fabulous Alexander McQueen clutch that is, I mean, 12 out of

10.

I called him and I’m like, oh, it’s, it takes a lot for me to be effusive over a gift.

I was like, Kyle, I am genuinely telling you, you crushed it.

You knocked it out of the ballpark.

You did.

I mean, even Josh was like, he nailed it.

Like that is a great gift.

Yeah.

It didn’t, it didn’t hurt that it had brass knuckles on it so you could, you know, take

care of people.

It does have brass knuckles like that you can attach your hand to.

Oh, that’s cool.

And so it is a nice little thing.

Like if somebody, we were just talking about personal space invaders before you got in

here.

And that’s a great, I could, we should get you one of these clutches, Pumps, because

you could use that.

Just knock the personal space invader completely out.

Just knock them out.

Kyle, I want to move on to this whole, you know, Pumps is single, you’re single and this

whole post divorce dating world, it seems to focus on women and it seems like, and maybe

it’s just because I’m a woman and that’s what shows up in my algorithm.

But as a man out there in the wilderness, a Gen Xer, walk us through your dating journey

post divorce and what that has been like for a man that often is confused with a gay

man.

Good looking, works in the design world, great gift giver, deep in the heart of Texas.

Tell us what this looks like.

Yeah.

So like, you know, you can, online dating is kind of interesting because you can just

put, you know, I’m straight, believe it or not, and try to clear the deck.

But, you know, I think that, you know, people that have been divorced, I mean, it’s complicated.

You meet people and there’s children and then there’s jobs and just all sorts of strange

stuff and blending things.

But I think there’s a lot of crazy in the field.

Oh yeah.

Yeah.

There’s a lot of crazy.

And I think we talked about this, you and I once, about like social media and I think

it kind of warps perspectives.

It does weird things to what would otherwise be like normal stuff.

Right.

You know, when you’re in the seventh grade, you’re like, I’ll see you after lunch.

Right.

And, you know, you see him after lunch, but, you know, somebody swipes right if you’re

online dating and they’re like, he hasn’t, you know, swiped right like I did.

You get all anxious and you wait on these things.

And I think, you know, there’s a lot of people that get a little lost in it all.

Have you ever bumped into people, you know, on an online dating app?

I have.

That’s why I went on, you know, I went on Bumble and you have these interesting things.

You kind of, you’re running into profiles of people and you’d be like, oh, that’s somebody

I know.

Oh, she’s a friend of mine.

All right.

No big deal.

Right.

And then you have, oh, she works for me.

Oh God, that’s, you know, so-and-so down the hall.

Right.

Okay.

There she is.

There she is.

And then you’re like, oh, I went out with her, hope she finds somebody.

And then you’re kind of like, oh, you know, there’s God, oh God, I dated her for a couple

of months.

Wow.

And she dumped me.

Right.

You know, I should try to do that again and see what happens.

And then there’s like, you know, the mother load of emotional reaction, which is bumping

into your ex-wife.

So walk us through this.

You’re swiping through Bumble.

Yeah.

And so what do you do?

Like one direction is a yes, one direction is a no, and you’re swiping and then pops

up your ex-wife.

I remember it was one night I was in a hotel or something and I was just like, well, you

know, why not take a look?

Might as well.

I mean, maybe somebody will say, I’m amazing, I love guys in the design business, I’m looking

to move to Austin, Texas.

I mean, I was hoping for everything.

I’m a great lay.

Yeah.

Like, you know, I’ve just, I cook, you know, I’ll do what you say.

I mean, I don’t know, whatever you want it to be, right?

And I’m swiping along and then, you know, boom, there’s my ex-wife.

Which was, so, you know, running into your ex online is kind of like a big one.

But it was kind of funny because, you know, that’s inevitable, right?

Right.

You know, we’re just going to be back in looking for someone.

But to see your ex is an emotional experience you can’t truly describe that people can relate

to.

But I was in the profile.

You were in the profile photo?

Yeah, which is super weird, right?

Right.

Like, I was in it.

Like a couple’s photo?

I remember going, oh, you know, damn, there she is.

And I started looking at the pictures and I’m like, there I am.

And it’s like, it’s like my hand coming around her hip or like on a shoulder.

It was like, I was cut out of every single one of them.

Oh, you were chomped.

Okay, wait, you were chomped, but your hand was in it.

All of them.

It was like the Addams Family.

You know, like the hand, I was like on a shoulder or, you know, you could see some fingers around

a hip or something.

Oh, that is great.

But I’ll never forget it because it was, it was like, oh, and then you, you know, it’s

like anything when you get, you step back and you stop and you go, okay, kind of look

at this and you read it.

And it perfectly summarized my ex, her description.

Okay.

I was, that was my next question.

Was the summary accurate?

Yeah.

The summary was just dead on.

It said, and I’ll never forget it.

It said, not for the faint of heart.

Got nothing else to say.

So Ponce, do you remember when our show launched and Kyle was so sweet and he was like, Hey,

I’m going to come up to Oklahoma city.

I’m going to get a big table and invite whoever you want to.

I’m going to take you and your friends to dinner.

And we found a like restaurant that had the TV so that we could all watch it.

And so Kyle, I’m going to let you take the story from here.

Tell the listener what happened.

You know, I’m, I’m pretty comfortable at stuff like this, but now I’m feeling a little awkward.

So here’s my version of the story.

So we’re having this lovely dinner, just like Jen described.

And Jen had a single friend who either she wanted me to meet very casually.

I’m not trying to set you up, just maybe you’ll like her.

I make space at the table and I’m like, Hey, sit next to me.

You know, how are you?

And you know, just kind of make conversation.

And then I’m like, Hey, so are you hungry?

Would you like something to eat?

And she goes, Oh God, that’s so nice.

Now mind you, it’s like 10, right?

It’s 10 o’clock and there’s, you know, there’s been a reasonable amount of wine.

And she’s like, Oh, that’s so nice.

That’d be great.

Let me order something real quick.

I’m like, Yeah, of course, please do.

And so the waiter comes over and she, you know, whispers something to him for dinner.

And then about 15 minutes later, she gets up and says, God, well, Hey, thank you.

You know, some kind of single mom thing, like the babysitter, my kids, you know, the meter.

I mean, it was just some kind of…

Gotta wash my hair.

Some kind of dumb excuse.

Like, I gotta go.

But it was lovely to meet you because there was, like we were talking about earlier, there

was…

Eh, it’s not here, right?

No spark.

Yeah.

I wasn’t looking for that.

But point being is she gets up to leave and I look over and I watch her leave and I look

over by the…

They’re in this private dining room and there’s this like a little credenza.

And on the corner of the credenza is this massive to-go bag.

Like with like styrofoam boxes popping out of the top, you know, like where you can’t

pinch the handle and they have to kind of tape it together and you end up hugging it.

Yeah.

And she picks it up and she just rolls out of the restaurant with a massive box.

And I remember the waiter, I look at him and he just kind of goes, you know…

Sorry, dude.

Yeah.

And he gave me like that, I’m so sorry, dude, like puppy dog eyes kind of thing.

And then when he brings me the check, I’m like, you got to tell me, what’s the damage

on there?

And he goes, man, I never seen something like that.

So she…

It was like sides and dessert and appetizers.

It was like a porterhouse, I mean, I was like, what?

So, but yeah, that was…

Sorry.

No, you know, I’m not sorry.

You know, I always kind of laugh with you, like, you know, I ain’t had it with a lot

of stuff, right?

Right.

I’m generally real positive.

But even something like that, I mean, I guess I should have had it with it.

But I look at things like that as like great stories and experience.

It was worth it in every way, because you kind of grow, you know, when things are hard,

you get better.

Right.

Kyle, we cannot thank you enough for joining us and giving us a male perspective on things.

My pleasure.

And I mean, not the gay male perspective.

The straight male.

The gayish straight male perspective on things.

Absolutely.

It’s an honor.

Look, I adore you both.

And thank you.

My pleasure.

Listener, you can find Kyle Bunting at at Kyle Bunting on Instagram and at KyleBunting.com.

And again, this delicious wallpaper behind us.

This is the man who makes it all.

I did that.

Thank you.

He did that.

All right.

Please like us, subscribe, rate, review, do all of those things.

And Pumps, tell the listener when we’re going to see them.

We will see you next Tuesday or next Thursday.

And either way, it’s cut.